


Equilateral

by JenniferHawke



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age II
Genre: Accidental Voyeurism, Anal Sex, Angst, Dirty Talk, Double Penetration, F/M, Impregnation, Jealousy, Multi, Oral Sex, Pregnancy, Rough Sex, Threesome, Threesome - F/M/M, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-27
Updated: 2014-12-18
Packaged: 2018-01-14 00:20:45
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 55,346
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1245718
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JenniferHawke/pseuds/JenniferHawke
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anders and Hawke wish to start a family, but try as he may, it appears the Grey Warden taint has made him sterile. They come to an agreement to let another man father her child. Enter Fenris. Will they be able to keep their arrangement strictly to procreate, or will old feelings re-emerge and complicate things? Anders/F!Hawke/Fenris OT3.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. You want me to what?

Anders huffed as he started his way towards the Hightown mansion. The sun was stinging his eyes, and it was intolerably hot, but the weather was the last thing on his mind. His nerves were racked, and his head hurt from the debate he was having with himself. He felt like fleeing, and running the other way but no, he needed to do this for Hawke. He needed to do it for them.

For nearly a year, they had tried to start a family, but the taint from being a Grey Warden made it unbearably difficult, and with much tried and failed attempts, it appeared that Anders was sterile. He performed multiple examinations on Hawke, and she was as healthy as they came. It was definitely him. He felt increasingly guilty each passing day, for he knew Hawke longed for a child of her own. They thought of adopting, but he knew how much she wanted to experience pregnancy herself, so he came up with the idea of another man fathering their child. 

Yes, this was his brilliant plan, he scolded himself now. The thought of Hawke laying with another man bothered him a great deal at first, and it still did, but it was for the greater good. One day, when they held their baby in their arms, it would all be worth it.

He brought up the subject one lazy afternoon after they just finished making love. She looked at him, wide eyed, mouth agape, and he could have sworn she was going to hit him for suggesting such a thing. 

“You want me to what?”

“It was just an idea, love. I’m sorry I even brought it up.” Her face softened, but clearly she was puzzled.

“You would truly be okay with this arrangement?”

“I would, yes. I want a child just as much as you do, and I am willing to go to any means necessary.”

“Hmmm...” she thought out loud. She took a moment to herself, then looked up at his waiting eyes. “Have you thought about who you would want to father this child?”

“Well, I was going to leave that part up to you. Obviously I want it to be with someone you are comfortable with.” Again, Hawke went silent. She took a moment to herself, clearly deep in thought about possible prospects. Then suddenly, a smile met her lips, and Anders knew instantly she had someone in mind.

“Anyone of my choice?”

“Anyone at all. I will trust and honour your decision.” Hawke looked Anders straight in the eye, still smiling.

“Fenris.”

“Fenris?” Anders repeated, shocked at her words. Of all the names, he was hoping this would be the last to come out of her mouth. He and the elf were constantly at odds. Not to mention he and Hawke slept together once before Anders came into the picture. It was an unsettling thought that she would be bedding an old flame. And what if old feelings resurfaced? Would she leave him for a man that was the biological father of her child, should she become pregnant?

“Yes, Fenris. He’s the only one I would trust. He and I are friends. Plus, I’ve already slept with him once before.”

“I know this.” Anders said, a little coldly.

“Hey,” Hawke replied, stroking his face. “You asked me who I would pick. We don’t have to do this. I would gladly live my life, with just you at my side.” Anders smiled at the woman he loved. She was always so understanding of him, and so completely devoted. He trusted her with his entire being, and he would do this for her.

“No, love. I’m going to give you a baby one way or another.” he said, bringing her into his arms, kissing her deeply. Soon, they were making love again, and the only thought that kept running through his mind was that eventually, her breasts would swell and her stomach would be round with a baby.

That brought him to his present predicament. Hawke said she was too nervous to ask Fenris herself, and for some reason, Anders agreed to go alone to ask the elf. What a foolish idea, he thought regretfully, as he began to approach Fenris’ mansion. The elf would likely throw him out on his ass, and it would make being in each other’s presence in the future all the more awkward than it already was. He stood, staring at the front door for a few minutes, before gaining the courage to knock. 

After a few moments, Fenris answered the door. A look of surprise resonated on his face, as he clearly was not expecting Anders of all people to be at his door. 

“Can I help you with something?” he asked. Anders took a deep breath in, feeling uneasy.

“In a matter of speaking, yes. I’m actually here on behalf of Hawke.”

“Is she alright?” Fenris looked concerned.

“Yes, she is. Could I um...come inside? It’s a rather delicate matter.” Fenris stepped aside, allowing the mage to come in. Anders looked around the room to see it in a state of disarray. Cobwebs and broken bottles lay scattered all over - and was that a corpse in the corner? Fenris’ intense glare brought him back to the present issue.

“Ah, yes. Um, oh...this is a little uncomfortable to talk about.”

“Spit it out, will you?”

“Okay. Hawke and I have been having some trouble.”

“Trouble with what?”

“It seems that I may be unable to give her a child.” Anders said, quite bluntly. He wanted to get this uncomfortable conversation with over as soon as he could.

“I see. And why are you relaying this information to me?”

“Hawke wanted....we wanted to know if you would be interested in helping us out in that department?”

“How could I possibly help...oh.” Fenris trailed off as the meaning of this meeting sunk in. 

“Yes.” Anders laughed nervously, although nothing about it was funny to either party.

“You would be okay with her laying with another man in order for her to conceive?”

“I love Hawke. I would do anything for her. So to answer your question, yes. It’s not something that I am overly thrilled about, but she wants a baby, and who am I to deny her that?” Fenris took a minute, stroking his chin deep in thought. It felt like an eternity to Anders before he spoke again.

“This child, it would be half mine. I’m not sure I could just walk away, as if it were nothing.”

Anders exhaled deeply. This was something he and Hawke discussed, but he was desperately hoping the elf would be willing to just get the deed done and leave them alone. 

“You would be entitled to visitation rights. We would not deny you of that. I understand this is a lot to process at once, but Hawke was adamant that you be the one we come to.”

“Why?” Fenris asked, clearly puzzled. Anders simply shrugged.

“She trusts you for some reason.” Fenris looked completely dazed, as if he had no idea what to do with the information that was so quickly bestowed onto him. 

“I will need time to consider it.”

“I understand. I will be on my way then.” Anders left the mansion, not feeling any better than he had when he arrived. They did not have an answer, and that had to have been the most uncomfortable conversation of his entire life.

 

Later that evening, Hawke and Anders were sitting together in her study. She was reading one of her favorite novels, and Anders was working on a new development for his manifesto. They heard a quick rapping at the front door, and they both stood up, a little alarmed at who would be at their door at this late hour. They quickly grabbed their staffs, just in case, and went to answer it. Anders pulled the handle, and there in the dark night, stood Fenris.

“I accept.”


	2. Seal the Deal

Anders stepped back and let Fenris into their home. The elf stood in the foyer, looking more than a little out of place.

“Fenris, are you sure?” Hawke asked him, moving forward to close their distance.

“Might I speak to you, privately?” he asked her.

“Oh, yes, I suppose you two will want me to leave.” Anders said, making his way to the door now.

“Anders, you don’t have to go. It’s late. We just need to talk about this first.” Anders smiled at his love, and planted a chaste kiss on her lips.

“It’s fine Hawke. I will just go to the Hanged Man for now. See if Varric needs some company or something. If you two wish to....seal the deal, you have my permission.”

“Alright.” Hawke said hesitantly.

Anders quickly left his home, convincing himself over and over again that this was what he wanted. Indeed, he would be getting drunk tonight. Justice was protesting, but Anders’ couldn’t give a damn what the spirit thought right now. He just wanted to be as far away from that mansion as possible. The thought that his Hawke might sleep with Fenris that very night haunted every step of the way to the tavern.

 

“Come, sit down with me,” Hawke said, leading Fenris into the study that just minutes ago, her and Anders were sitting in. She plopped down on the sofa, and he took a seat on the opposite side. He was sitting in a rather awkward manner, clearly he was anything but relaxed.

“So,” she said, trying to find the right words. “What made you decide to take us up on this offer?” Fenris stared at his feet, not able to look Hawke in the eyes.

“It occurred to me that, with my past, I may never be able to trust anyone enough to get close to them.”

“You allowed me to get close to you.”

“That’s just the thing,” he said, finally looking up at her. “In the nine years I have been a free man, you are the only one I have allowed to - “ he trailed off when she broke out into a smile.

“You mean that since our night together...?”

“There has been no one but you, Hawke.” Fenris gazed at Hawke eagerly. “We have never discussed what happened between us three years ago.”

“You didn’t want to talk about it,” Hawke reminded him.

“The memories...the pain of losing them was too difficult.”

“With Danarius gone, do you think it will be better this time?” Fenris chuckled at her question.

“It wasn’t bad the first time,” he said, moving closer to her now.

“Are you sure you want to do this, Fenris? If I become pregnant, there’s no going back.”

"As I mentioned previously, you are the only one I have allowed close in nine years, and you are with him now." he said the last part like it was a curse, avoiding her glance, yet again. “This may be the only chance I have at being a father. I thought about this all day. I want this.” His words plucked at her heartstrings, and Hawke placed a hand tenderly on his cheek. As soon as she did this, his lips claimed hers passionately. Fenris’ hands and grasped at the back of her head, holding her in place. His tongue swept the inside of her mouth, and they began to pant with want. Pressing into her, he forced her down onto her back on the sofa, and lay on top of her. She could feel that he was aroused, as he pushed himself into her legs and she softly sighed.

Fenris’ hands roamed over her body. They caressed down her arms, past her slender abdomen, until he reached up her shirt and began to massage her naked breasts. She moaned at his touch, remembering how good it felt the first time. Hawke began to rub herself against him and he smiled.

“Shall we take this to your bedroom?

“Maker, yes.” They both got off the couch, and she took him by the hand and led him up the stairs and into her room.

Fenris looked around the somewhat familiar space. “Looks almost just as it did when I was here last.” She smiled at him and sat down on her large bed, where he quickly joined her. Their clothes began to come off quickly - a shirt tossed here, a pair of trousers tossed there, until they were both completely nude. Fenris stared at her form, and she began to blush a little. Thoughts of Anders came to mind, and she started to feel guilty. He wanted this, he asked for it, but she knew it would not be easy for him to accept the fact that she had been with another man. She felt Fenris grasp her face with both hands and turn her head to look him in the eyes. He was on top of her, looking down with concern.

“Are you alright?” Hawke answered by kissing him deeply. She felt his hand glide down her body until he reached her center. He parted her folds with a gentle hand, and slipped a finger into her wetness. She gasped at his foreign touch, as he started to move it in and out of her. After a minute of his ministrations, he added a second finger and Hawke moaned.

“It would seem you are ready for me. You have soaked my fingers.” He chuckled. Fenris pulled his fingers out of her and brought them to his mouth. He sucked them clean, and then put them to her mouth and she did the same. She swirled her tongue around his digits and a lust filled groan escaped his lips. He began to kiss Hawke again as he slipped his erect member deep inside her, and they moaned into each other’s mouths in unison.

He began to slowly thrust his hips into hers, at a torturously slow pace. She whimpered, wanting more. She arched her back, and bucked her hips into him, meeting his thrusts half way. Fenris smiled down at her. “Did you want something, Hawke?”

“Yes, faster...please.” she begged him, and he was all too happy to comply with her wish. He started to move faster now, his cock pushing against that sensitive spot inside her, and Hawke moaned even louder now. Her legs were spread wide open, giving him all the room he needed to completely fill her. She squirmed from beneath him, as he gazed at her with longing eyes. Looking up at him, she noticed the look of want in his face, and she met him for a kiss. His tongue touched hers and she sucked on his lip, causing him to sigh and buck into her more rapidly.

Fenris pulled his face away, ending their kiss, but their lips were still almost touching. They looked into each other’s eyes, both refusing to break eye contact. He kissed her again, and Hawke squealed, feeling her climax building. She rested her head back on the pillow, and Fenris began to tease her. He pulled himself out of her almost completely, then thrust back in. He repeated this action a few times, at a slow pace, and Hawke writhed beneath him. Her hands grasped his arms, and she dug her nails into his flesh. One hand let go of him, and she wrapped it around his neck, holding him close as he fucked her. He moved in and out of her, meeting her hips with his, still going slowly. She was almost there, her release was upon her.

“I’m so close.” she panted, and at this Fenris thrusted faster. The head of his member pressed continuously against that sweet spot in her, and suddenly, she saw bright lights flashing in her eyes. Her whole body trembled, as her climax tore through her. 

“Fenris!” she screamed, and the sound of his name leaving her lips brought him over the edge with her.

“Hawke,” he moaned, as he spilled himself inside of her. Hawke felt the warm liquid ooze inside of her, and she rejoiced internally. She hoped this would mean that soon she would be with child. If not, she would practice with Fenris as much as she could - well, as much as Anders would allow it anyways. 

Fenris pulled her in for another kiss before he slid off of her. She lay on her back, catching her breath, before she turned to face him.

“So,” she said casually. “Different from the last time?” A smile spread across his face.

“Yes.”

“No visions?”

“Not one. I was here with you the entire time.”

“Well, this is good news,” she said softly, brushing a hair from off of Fenris’ damp forehead. He smiled at her, then pulled away. He sat up and moved off the bed, beginning to dress quickly.

“I should go.” The words rang familiarity in Hawke’s ears, causing her to remember the pain she felt when Fenris abandoned her their first night together. No, this is different, she had to remind herself. This was almost like a business transaction, he did his part, and now he had to leave.

“Fenris?” He turned to her and gave a faint smile.

“I am fine. You rest now. I will see you soon.” He answered, and quietly left her home. 

 

Two hours later, Anders stumbled back into the front door. His vision was blurry, and he had to catch himself from falling over a few times. He bumped into a side table, almost knocking over a vase.

“Fool,” he cursed the table. He sloppily kicked off his boots, making loud banging noises all the while. When he finally reached the bedroom door, he swung it open to find Hawke laying in bed in her nightgown, reading the book she started on earlier. She glanced over to him, noticing something different about him instantly. Anders gave her a goofy grin.

“Hi,” he simply said, and stumbled forward. He wasn’t very graceful, and Hawke saw right through him.

“Did Justice give you the night off?” she joked. Anders, still standing a few feet away giggled. 

“Nope.” 

He darted his eyes to the bed, where she lay in, and his smile quickly faded. He thought about her and Fenris, making love in the bed that they shared together. The image pulled at his heart, and he needed to know. 

“D--did you...and Fenris?” Hawke put her book down and looked at him, afraid of what his reaction would be.

“Yes,” she said quietly, staring at him with concerned eyes. He stood there, blankly looking at the bed.

“Anders,” she said, her voice full of regret. He caught on to this, even in his drunken state.

“No...I’m fine,” he said, coming to sit beside her on the bed. “We needed this.” Hawke took his hand in hers, and kissed his knuckles.

“I love you, Anders.”

“I love you too.” Anders hopped onto the bed, sitting on his knees in front of her. He grabbed her by the legs and pulled her down. His hands lifted her calves and bent her knees.

“What are you-”

“You know the drill,” he said, and smacked her bottom playfully. “Legs up. Will help you get pregnant.” he smiled.

“Oh, but I already did this tonight.” she protested.

“Shhh,” he said, clumsily putting his finger to her lips. She began to giggle at his drunken display. She had never seen him like this before, and it made her want to hold him close.

“Come here,” he said, arms stretched out to him.

“Cuddle later, stay like this first.” He said, as he yawned. He rubbed his eyes, feeling the alcohol induced haze take over. “Okay, cuddle now.” He said, plopping himself down beside her, and she laughed. She lay on her side, and wrapped her arms around him.

“Anders?” she asked, but he was already snoring softly. Hawke stroked his blonde locks, before tiring herself in for the night. She closed her eyes, and soon she was filled of dreams about her holding a brand new baby with slightly pointed ears.


	3. Bittersweet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And here comes the angst.

Fenris lay awake in his bed staring at the ceiling, replaying the day's events over and over again. When the mage first propositioned him, he hadn’t a clue what to think of it. It was absurd - why would they want him of all people to father Hawke’s child? He thought of Hawke, and that first night they slept together three years prior. It pained him to leave her, but the memories it brought - he refused to go through that kind of disappointment again. Eventually, time passed and he felt he was ready to try with her once more, but he was too late. Anders was in the picture, and it broke his heart.

Many nights, he had taken his hand to himself, thinking of their passion filled night. The way she cried out, the way she tasted - he remembered it all so vividly. And then the mage showed up at his door, practically offering Hawke up on a platter to him. It confused him to no end. It would have been so easy if it were only for the physical act itself, but no, they wanted a child - his child. Would he be able to live with that? Knowing that just a few blocks away, his offspring was being raised by another - a mage at that? And that was another thing, there was a huge possibility with Hawke’s bloodline that the child would be a mage itself. He felt so much turmoil inside, but the apostate assured him that he could be involved if he wanted. And want he did. Fenris had no idea if he would be a good father, but what if that chance never came again? Hawke was the only person he ever trusted in his entire life - and now she was with him. It was almost a decade since his escape, and no other woman claimed his heart, or had even come close to it. Hawke would be the only one he allowed there, he knew this, and to procreate with her - even if he was not truly hers, it would still mean that she would always stay in his life, always be bound to him in some way. So, he accepted.

He thought of how easy it was to kiss her again. Her lips claimed his with such a heated passion, just like they had before. And when he entered her, it was pure bliss. She cried out his name, and when it brought him over the end there were no memories this time. Now that Danarius was dead, he could leave the past to rot along with his corpse. He was so happy he could have shed a tear. Happy, yet it was a bittersweet feeling. It only proved that he was capable of making love to her without the pain, and now that he had realised it, it was too late. It only confirmed that leaving her was the biggest mistake of his life. 

But then the act was said and done, and he couldn’t stay any longer. So desperately he wanted to hold Hawke in his arms, and fall asleep there with her, but it was not his bed, and Anders was sure to come home eventually. It pained him almost as much as the first time he left, but that was the deal. He was simply a tool for her conception, and he shouldn’t let emotions get involved - it would only lead to disaster. 

He was becoming aroused again, thinking of everything that transpired that night. As he took his erect member in his hand, he could still smell her on him. Oh, how it drove him wild. He should have stayed and took her a second time. The temptation of going back there now crossed his mind for a minute, but he decided against it. The mage may have returned already, and that would just be awkward. Instead, he began to stroke himself furiously, imagining it was Hawke who rode him instead of his own hand. 

 

The next few weeks were trying for the elf. He assumed that this arrangement would mean that he and Hawke would be intimate until the day came that she was pregnant, and then things would return to the way they were before. But Hawke never came to him, so he kept his distance. There was one day however, she came to his door to ask him to accompany her to the Wounded Coast. He thought it was code for “let’s rut again” but when they turned the corner and saw Varric and Anders waiting, he knew she meant exactly what she said. 

It was infuriating walking with her and her lover and their dwarven friend, not a word spoken of what happened that night. At one point, Anders even pulled her into his arms and kissed her. Fenris felt sick. He scolded himself again and again about feeling so emotional when he knew exactly what their arrangement meant, but what he hadn’t anticipated was just how little it appeared to have meant to Hawke. 

By the time the sun was down and he was no longer needed, he left her presence as quickly as he could. He didn’t even accept Varric’s offer for drinks afterwards. He just wanted to be alone and stew in his own misery. He began to wish that he never agreed to sleep with her in the first place. 

 

Anders woke up and turned to his side. He reached over to grab for his love, but the bed felt empty. He opened his eyes and saw her sitting at her desk, looking miserable.

“Love? What’s wrong?” Hawke looked up at him with sad eyes.

“I’m not pregnant.”

“You mean...oh. I see.” He said, taking in the meaning of her words. 

“I guess it was all for nothing,” Hawke sounded guilty, and Anders had to put a stop to it. He climbed out of bed and walked over to her, placing a hand on her cheek.

“No, don’t think that way.” He exhaled and took a moment to collect his thoughts. It was his own fault she was feeling this way. He desperately hoped it would take only one time of her sleeping with the elf, but he should have known better than that. After that night, after his horrid hangover subsided, he asked Hawke to hold off sleeping with Fenris again. The thought of them sleeping together more than that one time did not sit well with him, and if there was a way around it, Anders would take it. But now, here she was, heartbroken and feeling guilty, and that just would not do.

“Sweetheart, I may have been a little jealous, and that clouded my ability to rationalize with the truth of the situation. I didn’t want you to sleep with Fenris more than need be, but...seeing as we don’t know just how many times it will take, I want you to continue to bed him. As often as you’d like until you are with child.”

“Anders, no. I don’t want to hurt you again. You were so sad that next morning, it would kill me to make you feel that way again.” Anders stroked her cheek softly, and tilted her head so that she was staring into his eyes.

“But I got over it, didn’t I? As long as I still get to make love to you, it will be fine. I want this. As long as it is still what you want.”

“It is.” she finally admitted. He smiled down at her and softly grazed her lips with his.

“Good. In a few days when you are done bleeding, you should pay Fenris a visit.” 

“Only if you’re okay with it.”

“I am, love. Trust me. Do it as much as you’d like, you don’t need my permission. In fact, I’d prefer you not tell me about it. Alright?”

“If that’s what you wish.”

“It is.”

 

Less than a week later, Hawke stood in front of Fenris’ door. Anders left for the clinic and she was going to take the opportunity to get some alone time with the elf. It was about a month since they were intimate, and they hadn’t spoken of it since. She had no idea what he was thinking or feeling, but then again she never did. Fenris was a man of mystery, and that was one of the many things she liked about him. She’d be lying if she didn’t admit that she felt a little empty when he left afterwards, and when he never brought up what happened. Hawke was even disappointed that he didn’t try to initiate sleeping with her again, despite her promise to Anders afterwards. She wouldn’t have gone through with it, but it would have been nice to know that he desired her. So many nights she thought of him since, he was so passionate in their lovemaking it was hard not to think of it. And here she was, at his door. Finally, she knocked.

As soon as Fenris opened the door, Hawke pushed him inside and assaulted him with her mouth. It seemed to take him by surprised because he hesitated for a moment, but then gave in to her. Her hands tangled in his hair and she panted as he sucked on her lower lip. He pulled away, looking at her with utter confusion.

“Hawke, what is this about?”

“Our arrangement. You know that.”

“But I thought...” he trailed off. “You did not come to me again after the last time.”

“I’m here now, aren’t I?”

“That is true, but why such a long wait in between?” Hawke huffed, tucking a loose strand of her hair behind her ear.

“Anders got jealous. He didn’t want us sleeping together more than once, but I didn’t get pregnant. So now I have his permission to do it as much as I’d like.” She shot him a mischievous grin, and he stared blankly at her.

“I see.”

“What’s wrong? You haven’t changed your mind, have you?” she began to panic.

“No. I just thought that...nevermind. It’s not important. Where were we?” She smiled at him and began to tear at his clothes, lifting his casual house shirt over his head. The strong warrior scooped her up over his shoulder and began to climb the stairs. When they reached the top, he slapped her rear and she squealed. 

Once they were in his bed chambers, he tossed her onto his bed and he began to shed the rest of his clothing. She did the same and by the time he looked up she was as naked as the day she was born.

“So Fenris,” she said seductively. “Which way would you like to try it this time?”

His mouth crushed hers as he joined her on his bed. He exulted inside, thanking the Maker that she came. He was beginning to lose his mind, wondering why she hadn’t said anything to him, but now she was here, on the very bed that he for so many nights thought of her when he pleasured himself. He felt Hawke climb on top of him, as she leaned over to suck on the tip of his sensitive ear. He shuddered from the waves of pleasure that it sent through his system.

She straddled his hips now, grinding onto his throbbing member. She teased it at her entrance, rubbing it back and forth against her. "Is that what you want?" she asked, smiling, very well knowing the answer. 

“Yes,” he groaned, almost losing his composure. He was so tempted just to grab hold of her hips and ram himself inside of her, but he patiently waited. Finally, she lowered herself on him, impaling herself with his length. "Oh Fenris.” she moaned.

Hawke cried out as he thrust into her at a frantic pace. It was obvious that she had gotten him incredibly worked up. She pushed his shoulders down, and started to ride him. The agile mage bucked her hips back and forth onto his cock, and they both sighed. She bobbed up and down on him, her strong legs assisting her in her grinding. 

Fenris couldn’t hold back anymore. He had waited too long. He grabbed her slender hips hard, and began to fuck her wildly. He grunted and groaned from beneath her and Hawke’s round breasts bounced up and down from the rocking of their bodies. She reached a hand down and began to stroke her nub as he pounded away into her. The sight of her pleasuring herself while on top of him almost made him lose his mind.

“I’m going to cum, make me cum, Fenris!” she wailed and he thrust even faster. His erect member slid in and out of her tight core with such ease, and then he felt her walls tighten around him. Hawke screamed out as her pleasure took over and she came undone around him. As she moaned with her release, he pulled her down and muffled her sounds with a searing kiss. As their tongues danced together, he spilled himself inside of her, panting with her as his body rejoiced.

When they finished catching their breath, Hawke rolled over onto her side, their limbs still entangled with each other. Fenris turned to her, and saw beads of sweat dripping from her hair.

“I suppose you’ll be wanting to be on your way now.”

“Why? Are you kicking me out?” she asked, propping herself up on her elbows.

“No, I meant no such thing. I just assumed you would want to get back to him now that we are done.”

“Anders will be gone until nightfall. I have the whole day to myself.” She said, tracing a line across his chest, where one of his lyrium markings lay.

“You wish to stay here?”

“If you’ll let me. Who knows, maybe we can go another round in a bit. But for now, I’m enjoying lying here with you, if that’s alright.” Fenris smiled.

“It is,” he said as he pulled her into his arms. He knew laying close to her like this, holding her in his arms in the afterglow, it could not lead to anything good. But in that moment, he didn’t care. All he cared about was that he was embracing Hawke, and it felt damn good. He would allow himself this one pleasure before she cast him aside, like he did to her those years ago.


	4. Voyeur

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kinky sexings ahead! First threesome of the story (there will be many more).

By the time Hawke got home, she was exhausted. Fenris took her twice more, and every muscle in her body was sore. She went into the bathing chambers and took a hot bath, slipping in and out of consciousness. There was no doubt in her mind that by the end of the month she would conceive at the rate things were going. After a good hour in the tub, she dried herself off and headed for her bed to get a good night’s rest. 

When she opened the door, Anders was sitting on the bed waiting for her. 

“When did you get home?” She asked.

“About ten minutes ago. How was your day, love?” Hawke paused for a minute, not sure what to tell him. She reminded herself that Anders said he would rather not know about when she slept with Fenris.

“Oh, it was fine.” she simply said. Anders outstretched his arms to her and pulled her into a hug. 

“I missed you today,” he said as he nuzzled into her neck, and that’s when he noticed the hickey.

“Um...Hawke?”

“Hmmm?” She was still in a half sleep like state.

“Were you with Fenris today?” Hawke quickly pulled away.

“Why?” Anders reached out and with one finger touched the mark on her neck.

“He left a parting gift.” Hawke started to blush, and she avoided eye contact with Anders.

“You asked me not to tell you.” Anders huffed, and pulled her close to him again.

“I know. It’s just not easy. I’m not angry, only a little jealous. I wish I could have you all to myself. I’m greedy like that.” he teased and began kissing down her neck. Hawke giggled, and flopped down on the bed.

“I’m exhausted. Can we just go to sleep please?”

“Oh no no no. The deal was that I still get to make love to you.” He said, painstakingly climbing up her body. Hawke began to protest, but decided not to. She didn't want Anders’ feelings to be hurt. She was still quite sore from earlier, but there were still things she could do for him. He had been a rather patient and understanding lover after all. 

She cradled him in between her legs as he began kissing her in a frenzy. She wrapped one leg around his, and before he could react, she flipped him over.

“Not tired anymore?” he chuckled.

“You’ve been so very good to me, I think you deserve a little reward.” she said as she scaled down his body. Anders smiled, and shed his pauldrons and robes in a hurried fashion. Hawke let her bathrobe hang open, and one of her breasts come out when she leaned over him. Anders reached up and pinched her nipple and she squealed.

She reached for his smallclothes and pulled them down. His member sprang free, already fully erect. Hawke stroked him slowly and deliberately. Anders lay his head back on the pillow and groaned. She smiled and lowered her head to him, licking from base to tip before circling her tongue around him.

“Quit teasing, love.” he groaned again and she chuckled, closing her mouth around him. She moved her head all the way down as far as she could take him, then back up. Down, then back up again, each time a little more urgently. She could feel Anders hands in her hair, and she glanced up to see him watching her.

“Maker, you look so good like that.”

This only encouraged her. Never taking her eyes off of him, she began to stroke his shaft as she continued to suck. She moved her hand up and down along with her mouth, using them both together. Anders began thrusting forward a little, driving her to take more of him into her mouth.

Hawke ran her tongue around his underside, which in turn caused him to moan loudly. She knew every time she did this, it always brought him close to completion. He pulled his member out of her mouth and stared down at her with suspicion.

“Oh, I see what you’re doing. Think you can get away that easily?” He said, amused. He grabbed onto her and flipped her on her back again and she giggled.

“Why, whatever do you mean?”

“I’m onto you, Hawke,” he said as he climbed her body. “Both literally and figuratively.” Anders opened her bathrobe and slid it off her body. He trailed a gently hand down her abdomen to her center, and inserted a finger. She gasped from the sense of sharp pain and he noticed right away.

“This hurts? What in the Void did you let him do to you?....No, nevermind, don’t tell me.” He said, then he applied some healing to her and she felt the pain numb. 

“Better?”

“Much.” She said, cupping his face and bringing his lips down to kiss her. As he slipped his tongue in her mouth, he pumped his finger in and out, making her soak him. He added a second one, and she arched her back into him. Anders used his thumb to massage her nub as he moved his digits, shooting little electric currents into her with his touch. She writhed and moaned into his mouth, as his lips never left hers. Her muscles began to clench, as her release shot from her, making her a heap of groans from under him.

“I think you rather enjoyed that.” he teased as he positioned himself at her entrance. Hawke was still coming down from her orgasm when Anders plunged into her. He didn’t give her any time to recover. She instinctively wrapped her legs around his waist, allowing him to thrust deeper into her core. She grabbed onto his back, her nails digging into his flesh as his member hit her in that sensitive place over and over again, making her mewl with pleasure.

“Does this feel good?” he asked.

“Yes,” she sighed, closing her eyes, letting the bliss take over.

“Has he ever fucked you like this?” Hawke’s eyes flew back open, but she could tell he wasn’t angry. Instead he had a mischievous twinkle to his eyes. She didn’t know what to say. 

“Well, did he?”

“Yes.” she said quietly, and Anders began to buck into her faster. 

“Does his cock feel as good as mine?” he asked, as he stared at her, his eyes piercing through her.

“Anders.” she gasped.

“Answer me, Hawke.” he said as he took her fiercely, making her moan even louder.

“N-no,” she stammered, not knowing how she should answer his question. They were both more than sufficient at pleasing her, she didn’t favor one over the other.

“Good.” Anders lowered his mouth to hers and he slipped his tongue past her lips. She could feel her climax building again. She pulled her mouth away, needing the extra intake of air.

“You’re gripping onto me like a vice. You’re going to cum again soon aren’t you, love?” Hawke nodded, barely able to form words, she was panting so much.

“Call out my name when you do. I want to hear my name on your sweet lips.” He whispered seductively into her ear. That was all it took. Her whole body shook and she could see bright lights flashing through her closed eyes.

“Anders!” she gasped as she thrashed from under him.

“Oh Maker.” he said as he felt her muscles tighten and release around his member, bringing him to completion. His seed poured into her, and he trembled and moaned into her ear.

Anders flipped over onto his back, the both of them gasping for air. Hawke reached out and found his hand, entwining her fingers into his. He brought it up to his lips and kissed her delicate skin.

“Thank you, sweetheart. You can sleep now.” And sleep she did. As soon as she closed her eyes, she drifted off. It was a very busy day for her, after all.

 

Two mornings later, Anders was getting ready to leave for his clinic. They just ate breakfast together, and Hawke was still finishing her fresh juice when he leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“I may be a little late tonight. I have a lot to get through today.”

“I’ll miss you.” she looked up at him with adoring eyes.

“I’m sure you’ll find something to keep yourself occupied with.” Anders said suggestively, and Hawke blushed. “That’s a good girl.” he chuckled. “Just so you get my meaning, I am really hoping that you will become with child soon. So, make sure you take every chance you get. I don’t mind.” 

Hawke gaped up at him, and his eyes were set on hers. Over the last few days Anders seemed to get over whatever insecurities he had. It was as if it no longer bothered him, and she was a little taken aback by it.

“Have a good day, love. I’ll be thinking of you,” he said, as he turned and left the estate.

He wasn’t gone for more than five minutes when there was a loud knock at the door. When she opened it, Fenris lunged forward and quickly captured her lips with his. Hawke stumbled back a bit, and he caught her.

“Fenris!” she breathed out.

“I saw him leave. Will you be alone long?”

“He’s on his way to the clinic.”

“Just what I was hoping you’d say.” his eyes smiled at her and he kissed her yet again, even more roughly this time.

“I need you, Hawke,” he whispered into her ear, as he grabbed her hand and placed it over his cock, fully erect.

“Well then,” she sighed staring up into his green eyes. “I’d better get you taken care of.” She took hold of his hand and lead him to her bedroom, closing the door behind her. Fenris lifted her robes over her head and let them fall to the floor. Hawke unbuckled his pants as he tore off his jerkin. Soon they were in the bed, only in their smallclothes.

“I’ve been thinking of you. In fact, I’ve been able to think of little else.” he whispered in her ear, the same words he said to her one their first night together. He unclasped her breast band, letting it fall to the bed.

“I’m more than flattered.” Hawke said, kissing his bottom lip. “Does that mean it was that good for you too?”

“It was more than good.” Fenris took one of her nipples into his mouth, gently sucking on it, swirling his narrow tongue over the sensitive bud as he did so. His other hand toyed and pinched the other, making them pebble under his touch.

As he sucked, he reached down with one hand and stroked in between her legs, over her smallclothes. He could feel that she was wet through the fabric and it made him groan. "I think you need to get rid of these." He said, as he grabbed the waistband and slid them over her hips. He drank in the sight of her. He lowered his hand to her center once again, and started circling her nub with the tip of his finger, kissing her as he did so.

“Fenris.” she moaned, feeling his soft finger toying with her.

“Yes, Hawke?” he responded, playfully.

“Don’t stop. Oh Maker, don’t you dare stop.” Fenris chuckled, low in his throat.

“But what if I have something even better planned for you?” He asked. Hawke stared, wide eyes as he lowered his head to her mound. He watched her eyes intently and she shuddered with anticipation. 

Fenris opened his mouth and slowly traced his tongue along her bundle of nerves. Hawke gasped, her eyes shutting, reveling in the pleasure. He flicked his smooth tongue along the nub, moving at a feverish pace. Hawke gripped the sheets, her legs squirming about. He took two of his fingers, and pushed them into her core. She was already soaked with anticipation. He began to move them in an out and Hawke gasped and moaned.

His tongue felt like heaven on her, causing every fiber in her being to awaken. Each flick, each thrust of his finger, brought her to new heights. She couldn’t keep still, she arched her back and called his name.

Suddenly he stilled and her eyes darted down at him.

“Did you hear something?” Hawke moaned at the lack of his touch. She hadn’t.

“No, it’s probably just Bodahn downstairs. Please don’t stop. I need you.” Fenris gave her a smile and then held her hips still. He sank his tongue into her tight entrance.

“Oh, Fenris!” she squealed, bucking her hips into his face. The elf moved his head back and forth, fucking her with his tongue. It was a unique feeling, having a tongue inside of her, and it made her tremble, feeling waves of ecstasy roll throughout her body.

 

Anders stepped back into the estate. He forgot an important sack of herbs in the bedroom, one that he specifically needed today. He did not see Hawke in the kitchen anymore, and he figured she left their home. He ambled up the stairs, and when he reached the top he heard her. His heart dropped.

She was moaning his name. The elf was there, pleasing her in their bed, so soon after he left. Anders felt that twinge of jealousy he had before, but this was different, because he could hear it happening. He couldn’t stop his curiosity. He put his ear to the door and listened in.

Hawke cried out, he heard that exact noise so many times before, when it was him who caused it. He found himself becoming aroused, despite the jealousy. It was an odd sensation. He experienced it several times the last few days. He thought about her and Fenris together, what she sounded like, what they did together, how she would become pregnant. It drove him mad and at the very same time, he couldn’t help but wish he could see it. Earlier that week he got so worked up thinking about it, he pleasured himself to the thought.

He took a deep breath, and then slowly opened the bedroom door.

Hawke was completely naked, her legs spread open as the elf licked at her center. They hadn’t noticed him yet, so he just stood there watching. So they do more than just have intercourse. he thought to himself, feeling a little betrayed. That was more than what they agreed upon. He watched as she tangled her fingers in his white hair, encouraging him to continue. Her moans grew faster and more frantic, and Anders knew from that ever so familiar look on her face that she was about to cum. She cried out, praising his name as her whole body trembled. Beneath his breeches his cock twitched, watching her moan the way she was. Fenris continued pumping his fingers in and out of her as he lapped at her nub. Finally Hawke opened her eyes, and saw him standing there.

He had never seen her move so quickly to cover herself.

“Anders!” she yelled in shock, both of them jolting away from one another. Fenris cursed at him in Arcanum.

Anders pushed the door closed behind him and moved a bit closer.

“I thought you were going to be at the clinic,” Hawke said as she frantically tried to find where her robes were discarded. Fenris just scowled at him.

“I came back for something I forgot, and then I heard you.”

“That does not give you the right to just barge in.” Fenris snapped.

“Doesn’t it? This is my home.” He turned his attention to Hawke, who was blushing all over. “I was thinking. I cannot be the one who gets you pregnant, but I still want to be involved in the process somehow. It will be my child too, after all.”

“What are you saying, mage?” Fenris asked a little coldly.

“What I am saying, is that I want to watch.”

“You can’t be serious, Anders.” Hawke said in complete disbelief.

“I am.”

“Why would you want to see this?”

“I just do. I can’t explain it. But since I have been so lenient, can you not grant me this? For today, at least?”

Hawke glanced at Fenris who was still stiff with anger. He turned to Hawke, and noticed she was no longer trying to conceal her nudity. She looked beautiful, and her eyes looked back at him with curiosity.

“This is what you want?” Fenris asked her.

“I’m not going to say no.” she smirked and cocked an eyebrow at him. He was annoyed at the interruption from his limited one on one time with Hawke, but he wasn’t sure if he had the right to be mad. “Very well.” he said, softly. 

Anders sat at the writing desk, and turned the chair around so that it was facing the bed.

“Forget I’m even here.” he said with a smirk on his face.

Fenris felt Hawke’s gentle hand on his arm, and he turned to her. She lay back now, and reached out to embrace him. He awkwardly climbed over her, feeling a bit strange that they were being watched by her lover.

“Look at me.” she said, and he gazed down at her blue eyes. Her hand landed on his erection again, over his small clothes. Fenris closed his eyes.

“I’m pretty sure you need to remove those in order to get the job done.” Anders joked.

“Shut up, mage.” He felt uncomfortable undressing, but he wanted Hawke, had to have her. He slid the small clothes off, and thrust into her. 

Hawke cried out as soon as he was inside of her. She kept her eyes on Fenris, not letting them wander off, letting him know she was there with him. His modesty began to fade away as pleasure replaced it. He snapped into her wildly, claiming her, marking her. He was too busy focusing on his and Hawke’s pleasure to notice that Anders released himself and began stroking his member, watching them.

Fenris had a sense of urgency to take her as rough as he could, to prove something to Anders, perhaps. He grabbed onto Hawke and flipped her over, so that she was on her knees facing Anders. He wanted the mage to see how much she enjoyed getting taken by him. That’s when he noticed that Anders was masturbating. He lost his focus for a moment, but then stared down on Hawke’s body, and that was all he needed. He entered her again, wasting no time in pounding into her hard. Her cries became louder. He found himself loving that the mage got to watch this, a sense of pride that he was the one inside Hawke. He stared down at her body, admiring the way that her entrance seemed to swallow him whole, when he heard her cries became muffled.

He saw Anders standing directly in front of her, his cock in her mouth. Hawke willingly accepted it, sucking on the tip. He completely stopped, not sure what to think of this. Anders looked over at him.

“Don’t stop on my account.” he chuckled, which was soon replaced with a lustful moan. “Oh yes, love. Just like that.”

Fenris watched her for a moment, as she pleasured Anders. He watched as her head moved back and forth on his member, and something inside of Fenris liked it. He couldn’t make sense of why, but he went with it. He picked up his pace yet again, moving in and out of her tight entrance. 

Hawke was pushed into Anders’ member each time Fenris moved forward. She kept taking more of it in, causing Anders to moan loudly. Her tongue massaged the underside of him and he began panting louder and louder.

“Maker, Hawke...” he gasped, spilling himself into her mouth. 

Fenris reached around and toyed with her nub, moving his finger back and forth. She was completely drenched, so his digit slipped with ease. He felt her clench on his cock, her muscles contracting as her release came. He picked up his pace, wanting to find his own. Fenris grabbed her hips and squeezed hard as he began to fill her with his warm seed. He grunted, an almost animalistic sound, as it shot into her. He felt his member soften and he slowly withdrew from her.

He noticed when he came down from the afterglow, that Anders already began to dress. The mage went over to a drawer, and pulled out a sack of some sort.

“There it is.” he laughed. “I have what I originally came for.” He came back to Hawke and kissed her. When he pulled away he turned to Fenris.

“You can stay if you like. I’ll be gone all day. I’m sure you two can go a few more rounds in that time.”

“You do not have a problem with this?” He asked, confused.

“It was my idea, remember?” Anders looked at Hawke once more, then left the room. She rolled onto her back and smiled at him.

“Any thoughts?” she laughed.

“It was....different.”

“It was.” she agreed.

“Did you enjoy yourself?” A smile spread across her face.

“I have nothing to complain about. It was rather fun. Are you alright?” 

“I...yes, I am fine.” Hawke lifted her legs, angling them upwards. He saw her do this the last time they were together, she informed him that it would help her conceive. He climbed on top of her, and began to kiss her softly. He could never get enough of her, and he knew that his time was limited. He wanted to make the most of it while he could. Fenris felt himself stiffen, and soon, he was inside of her.


	5. Touch Me

Hawke’s fingers glided under the words as she read them aloud to Fenris, who was curled next to her on the couch. After they made love, she asked him if he would like to stay for a reading lesson. It had been a few years since their last one, and Fenris was more than willing to pick up where they left off.

Fenris’ head rested on her shoulders, as he gazed at the words and listened to her soothing voice. She could feel his warm breath on her neck, and it made her smile. She missed being close to him like this, more than she would like to admit. Feeling him next to her made her realise that she would be sad when his visits stopped. Hawke would have given anything to hold on to what they had, but she knew that it just wasn’t possible.

After a few minutes, she heard the door open, and Anders stood there, taking in what he saw.

“What’s going on here?” Fenris moved away from Hawke quickly, and she stood up.

“Just a little reading lesson.”

“A reading lesson?” Anders stared at the two of them. Something didn’t sit quite right about the scenario. “This wasn’t part of our agreement, Hawke.” 

Fenris stood up, glaring at him. “You do not own her, she can make her own decisions.”

“Stay out of this, elf. It doesn’t concern you.” He warned.

“Anders, we were just reading.” Hawke said, standing behind Fenris.

“Fine. I will be upstairs,” Anders said as he stormed off. Hawke let out a deep sigh and plopped herself back down on the couch.

“Perhaps I should leave.”

“You can come back tomorrow morning. We can continue then.”

“Are you sure that is wise?”

“It will be fine.”

“Very well. I will return in the morning.” Fenris looked down at Hawke with tender eyes, and then left her estate. Hawke marched up the stairs, and opened the door to see Anders pouting on the bed. She walked over, and sat beside him, and put a hand on his back. As soon as she touched him, he shrugged her off and stood up.

“What’s going on with you and Fenris?”

“What do you mean what’s going on? We’re friends.”

“Oh, suddenly you and him are ‘friends’ now?”

“We were always friends, Anders, but it got complicated when you and I became involved. I used to have him over to read once a week. I figured that since he was already here, it would be fine to pick up where we left off.”

“I saw the look in his eyes. There was affection there, Hawke. Even if you are blind to it, I’m not. I don’t want to lose you.”

“You aren’t going to lose me, Anders,” she said, standing up and taking his hands in hers. “Please, don’t be angry.” Hawke trailed a bunch of kisses up his jawline and then onto his lips. He smiled and looked down at her.

“I could never stay angry with you, love.”

“Oh good, because I told him to come back in the morning so we could continue.”

“Hawke...”

“Please, Anders. You can even stay in the room if you’d like.” She looked up at him, with a pretend pout on her lips. He took her bottom lip into his mouth and gently nipped at it.

“That’s not going to work on me every time, you know.”

“But it worked this time, didn’t it?” she asked with an eyebrow raised and a mischievous grin. 

“Come here, you.” He slapped her rear before pulling her into a deep kiss.

 

Hawke had just finished getting dressed when Anders awoke, wearing only his smallclothes. She was walking by the bed when he grabbed onto her wrist, and tried to pull her down for a kiss. He started biting her lip, hungry for more. Anders unbuttoned her blouse when she smacked his hand away.

“Anders! Fenris will be here any minute now.”

Oh, but he knew. He had been thinking about it all night. He needed Hawke, needed to claim her as his for that elf to see. Perhaps he would let Fenris join in, if he was feeling generous enough. He did quite enjoy watching last time, and if he enjoyed watching, maybe he would enjoy sharing her even more. But before he could react, she quickly made her way out of the bedroom and down to her study, where Fenris would no doubt be making an appearance soon. Anders would have to act quickly. He grabbed his housecoat, tied it around his waist, and went to join her in the study. She was already sitting on the long couch, and he clicked the door shut behind him. She had some silly children’s book in her hand, no doubt the reading level the elf was at. Anders sat down beside Hawke, and before she could react, he flipped her onto her back and pinned her wrists above her head.

“I’m hard for you,” he whispered in her ear, grinding into her legs. “In my dream last night, you were so very naughty. I think you need to make it up to me.” He said, once again unbuttoning her shirt. She let out a whimper, feeling his erection pulsing between her legs. 

“Tell me, what did I do that was so ‘naughty’?” Anders stared into her eyes that were beginning to haze with lust.

“You, my dear, did everything to drive me wild. You stripped in front of me, bent over to show me that perfect ass of yours, and then you fucked Fenris, and wouldn’t let me have you when he was finished. Now, that wasn’t very nice of you, was it?” 

Hawke began to giggle. “Dream Hawke! How dare you do such a terrible thing to poor Anders!”

“It was terrible indeed. So terrible, and yet, it aroused me so much I think I may die unless I find some release. A nasty way to go, that is.”

“Well then, I will not let you die on my watch. I am a healer after all.” She grinned, and he began to kiss her passionately.

 

Fenris knocked on the door, and no one answered. He stood waiting for a few minutes, feeling like a fool. Hawke did tell him to come by this morning. Maybe her servants were out and she hadn’t heard him. He decided to let himself in. He would wait for her in her study until she was ready. He really didn’t feel like speaking to the abomination anyway.

He made his way to the study, opened the door, and as he stepped in he saw Hawke, naked from the waist up with Anders hands all over her body. They both turned their attention to him, and he stepped back embarrassed. 

“Oh...I...” he said, looking away, as he began to leave the room.

Anders looked down at Hawke, and then to Fenris. “You don’t have to leave.” he said. Both Hawke and Anders stopped what they were doing, waiting for a response from Fenris. He stood in the doorway, his back turned to them, his hand on the door. He stayed there for a few moments, when suddenly he whipped around, slammed the door shut, and strode over to them, claiming Hawke’s mouth. 

“That took less convincing than I thought it would.” Anders smirked. Hawke pulled away from Fenris and gave Anders a look of disbelief.

“You little sneak! You planned this didn’t you?” Anders laughed softly, and stroked her hair.

“Don’t for a second tell me you didn’t enjoy yourself last time. I know you did. But last time, the focus was on us, today, it should be on you.” He began to nibble on her earlobe. “Tell me, love, wouldn’t you like to be pleasured by us both?” Hawke could only answer with a moan, as Fenris sucked on her neck, the opposite side Anders was. She was sitting upright, her legs off the couch, with one man on each side of her. Anders lowered his hands and began to pull down her trousers, along with her smalls. The two men quickly undressed, and then began to focus their attention on Hawke once again.

Anders kissed her, while he grazed a thumb over one of her erect nipples. As he did this, Fenris kissed his way down her neck, past her clavicle, until he reached her other nipple with his tongue. He lapped at it hungrily, which made Hawke moan into Anders’ mouth. Anders looked down at what the elf was doing, and he grinned. He leaned down, and took the other one into his mouth, so that both of her breasts were receiving the same treatment.

Hawke bucked her hips up and down, unable to control her movements. She had never felt so aroused in her entire life, having the two men she cared about most pleasing her at the same time. She searched with both hands, until she found a throbbing member on either side. She stroked them up and down in unison, making both men groan along with her. 

She felt two hands both reach down to toy with her mound at the same time, when Anders began to push Fenris’ hand out of the way. 

“She is mine, elf. I will be the one to pleasure her first.”

“You have her every night. I believe it is my turn, mage.”

“Is that so? I could very well kick you out right now!”

“Please, stop fighting and somebody touch me already!” Hawke whimpered. Her clit was swollen with arousal and she felt like she would start crying if it didn’t get attention soon enough. Anders quickly moved his hand back to her center and started circling her nub with a finger, and she bucked forward.

“Finally!” she mewled. Fenris wasn’t giving up so easily. He sank onto his knees in front of her, and pressed his tongue into her opening. Hawke thrashed on the couch, unable to keep still. Fenris’ slick muscle pushed in and out of her, while Anders’ experienced digit stroked her in the way that she loved. 

“Oh Maker...” she cried.

“Do you like this?” Anders asked seductively.

“Mmhmm.” she whimpered. Fenris pulled his tongue out of her wetness.

“Tell us, or we will stop.”

“I love it, oh please keep going!” Both men smiled and went back to work. Anders index finger tapped at her bundle of nerves while Fenris’ tongue darted in and out of her tight entrance. Her arms flailed all over the couch, desperate to grab hold of something - anything, when her climax erupted. She began to cry out louder than she ever had, panting and praising the Maker. Her legs shook uncontrollably, and Fenris had to pin them down in order to keep penetrating her with his tongue. Finally, the waves of pleasure started to subside, and her breathing slowed. Fenris reached up and pulled her down for a passionate kiss. She could taste herself all over his tongue. She reached forward and stroked his member, as her other hand searched for Anders. He grabbed her hand and led it to his cock. 

“Hmmm, I think you boys deserve something in return for that special performance.” She slid off the couch and sat on her knees, motioning with a hand for Fenris to sit down. The elf cautiously sat down, trying not to get too close to the mage. 

Hawke stroked them both at the same time, but it was Anders who felt her hot, wet mouth first. She circled her tongue around the head, and then enclosed her lips around him. He sighed, and fisted her hair. He assisted in bringing her head back and down as she sucked his member, all the while stroking Fenris.

She came off of Anders’ cock with a loud pop, and then moved her lips to Fenris’ shaft. She gave him the same treatment. Her soft tongue glided along the underside of him as she bobbed her head up and down on him. Fenris panted loudly, and Hawke looked up to stare in his eyes. Her crystal blue eyes were dark with desire as she sucked him and made him squirm from under her.

She teased both men for a few minutes, switching from one to the other, until Anders decided it was enough. He got up from the couch, as she was sucking Fenris’ hard cock, and he positioned himself behind her. Without warning, he slammed into her hard, making her moan loudly onto Fenris, who was in her mouth. 

“You’re so wet. You love this, don’t you my naughty girl?” 

She could only respond my moaning loudly into Fenris. Her head bounced up and down on him, following the rhythm of Anders’ deep thrusts. She moved a hand down, and played with Fenris’ sack as she quickened her tempo on him. He looked down at her, watching her face, seeing how much pleasure she was experiencing by submitting to them. He thought that seeing her with Anders’ would hurt him, and although it felt uncomfortable at first, he loved the look she had on her face. He would do anything for her. 

“Don’t make him cum in your mouth, love.” Anders chuckled, and she pulled her mouth off of Fenris. Anders removed himself from her tight channel, and sat on the couch, bringing Hawke with him. She sat in front of him, his erection pressed into her back, slick with her juices. He grabbed her legs, and pulled them apart, displaying them to Fenris. She felt powerless being held down by Anders like this. It made her desire grow.

“Tell him what you want.” Anders growled in her ear. She looked deep into Fenris’ eyes.

“I want you to fuck me. I want you to impregnate me. Please Fenris, give it to me.” she begged, and he was all too happy to oblige. He bolted from his spot beside her, and kneeled in front of her open legs. He plunged deep into her, and she screamed out.

“Hawke,” he gasped, deep in his throat, as he began to fill her deep with his shaft. “You are so tight.” 

She whimpered as he snapped into her wildly, and every time she tried to move her legs, Anders held them tighter.

“Oh you’re not going anywhere, love. Not until he’s done with you.” She began to feel that familiar coil deep in her loins. The mixture of Fenris’ thrusts, along with Anders’ dirty words were enough to bring her over the edge. 

“Make me cum,” she cried out, her inner walls gripping Fenris as he fucked her. He slammed in and out of her, drawing out her orgasm as long as he could.

When she came down from her climax, Fenris sat back down on the couch, bringing Hawke with him. He pumped into her tightness, as she leaned over and sucked Anders’ cock. It didn’t take the mage long to fill her mouth with his seed; he had been so worked up holding her to his body, it only took a few thrusts in her mouth. When he had finished pumping into her mouth, he brought her lips to his, and began to kiss her. She moaned into his mouth, and soon Fenris began to spill inside her.

“Yes, take it,” he growled, jets of his semen shooting deep into her womb. 

She could feel the warm liquid inside of her and it made her smile. Every time Fenris had cum in her, she had the same reaction. Hawke slid off his body, and lay down on the couch. Her head was in Anders’ lap, and her legs draped over Fenris. She had no words, and for once, she remained quiet.

“Silence is unlike you, Hawke,” Fenris teased. 

“Don’t worry, she’ll be good to go again in a few minutes.” Anders chuckled.

“Again? Oh Maker, you two will be the death of me!”


	6. Urgent News

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Onto the main plot now! All aboard the angst train.

“Hawke....Sweetheart?” Anders voice rang in her ears. She groggily rubbed her eyes. 

“What is it?”

“You never sleep in this late. I just wanted to let you know I’m off to the clinic now.”

“Mmmmph,” she groaned, and rolled back over, pulling the sheets over her head.

“Are you sure you’re alright?” Anders sat on the edge of the bed, and rubbed her back. She huffed, and pulled the blankets off of her face.

“I’ve been so tired the past few days. I just want to sleep all day.” She groaned.

“Hawke,” Anders, began. “You are aware that increased fatigue is one of the first symptoms of pregnancy, don’t you?” 

She sat upright quickly. “Well, I do now!” Anders chuckled.

“I suppose a proper examination is in order. And just your luck, too; you have a doctor in your house. Lay back again.” Hawke giggled, and rest her head back on the pillow. Anders lifted her night shirt up, and applied a bit of pressure on her stomach. He summoned a spell, to see if he could detect a heartbeat within her womb. Hawke’s pulse raced, and she wished he would hurry up. Anders pulled his hand away.

“Well, don’t keep me waiting!”

He looked her deep in the eyes, and broke out in a smile. “You’re pregnant.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, love.”

At that, Hawke jumped up and leaped into his arms. He held her close, kissing her hair as he did so. When she pulled away, tears were running down her cheeks. Anders used the pads of his thumbs to wipe them away.

“We’re going to have a baby.” she said, her voice shaking with emotion. Anders spun her around in his arms, and then lay her back on the bed, kissing her gently.

“Stay in bed. Rest. I’ll be back later.” He stroked her face as she grinned up at him. “I’ll be thinking of only you.” He gave her one more quick kiss on the cheek, before he departed. Hawke was too giddy now to go back to sleep. She bathed quickly, then got dressed and headed out the door to tell Fenris the news.

On the way to Fenris’ mansion, she wondered how he would take the news. Would he be excited, nervous, or would be be sad that their affair would now have to end? Suddenly, her heart plunged within her. She was so thrilled with learning she was pregnant, she hadn’t had the time to reflect what it would really mean for her and Fenris. It had been two and a half months now, since they started sleeping together. As much as Hawke longed for this baby, a small part of her wanted to prolong the experience. She was a damn fool, she had started to fall for Fenris all over again. She made a promise to herself, and to Anders as well, that it was strictly for the purpose of making a baby. But when they were alone together, they shared little moments of affection - the way he would sometimes brush her hair off of her face, the way Hawke would laugh at his dry sense of humour, even the way they confided in secrets that they dare not speak of to another soul. She had no idea if Fenris felt the same way, but she felt an emptiness hit her, and she knew that losing that intimacy with Fenris was going to hurt. 

Hawke knocked on his door, and waited for several moments. It appeared he was not home. She grabbed a piece of paper and a quill from her sack and wrote him a quick note.

Fenris, 

I have some urgent news. Please meet me at the estate.

-Hawke

She slipped the note under his door. It would also serve as a reading exercise, but she was positive he would be able to make out the words. He had come a long way since they had resumed their lessons. Hawke went back home, to await for his arrival.

Less than two hours later, there was a knock at the door. She knew it was Fenris right away, just from the way his fist hit the door. She opened it, and he stepped inside.

“Is everything alright, Hawke? You said there was something of importance in your note?”

“Well...as a matter of speaking, yes.” she said, and smiled up at him. “You did it: I’m pregnant.”

“You are certain of this?”

“Yes. Anders examined me this morning.”

“That is good.” Fenris said with a small smile. “I am happy for you.”

“Thank you so much.” She said, and pulled him into a tight embrace. She felt his strong warrior arms wrap around her petite frame, and could feel his breath on her neck. With a gentle hand, he tilted her chin up to look at him.

“I would do anything to please you, Hawke.” he said, and his lips softly brushed against hers.

 

Anders stood in the doorway and froze at the sight before him. Fenris was kissing Hawke. His blood boiled. It wasn't uncommon to see them in the throes of passion, he had walked in on it several times over the span of two months. But for one, she was pregnant now, and two - this wasn't a lust filled kiss as they had always shared; this one was tender, sweet. The way two people would kiss when they were mad about each other. He slammed his staff down on the marble floor so his presence would be known, and the two of them scrambled away from one another. 

He just stared at them, unable to find the words. He felt sick to his stomach.

“I was so looking forward to coming home to you. I even brought you this.” He lifted his arm, and tossed a child’s stuffed animal at her, which she willingly caught, and looked down at it as if it had just broke her heart. “I shut down the clinic early, because I wanted to surprise you.” Anders murmured, with a lump forming in his throat. “Care to tell me what’s going on here?”

“Anders...I didn’t mean to...I just told Fenris to news and...”

“And you let him kiss you like that.” Hawke hung her head down in shame, and Fenris kept his eyes on her all the while. 

“I have seen what’s been going on here. I have watched it myself. Look at me, Hawke.” She brought her eyes to his, and he could see the guilt in them.

"You love him, don't you?" The words flew out of his mouth, and as soon as they did, he immediately regretted saying them. He didn’t want to know the answer, he dreaded it. And yet, her silence was all he needed to know the answer. She went pale, and her eyes cast downward. Fenris’ mouth went agape, as he stared at her in disbelief.

“Hawke?” Fenris asked her, and her eyes welled up with tears.

“I didn’t mean for...” she whispered, but Anders cut her off abruptly.

“I knew this would happen.” He said bitterly. His biggest fear was that Hawke would leave him for Fenris. And why wouldn’t she? The baby was his afterall. Why put a middleman into the equation? He looked at her one last time, before he turned away. Better beat her to it, he told himself.

“I love you, Hawke, but I will not bother you anymore. Goodbye.” He choked back on that last word, and left the estate, a single tear rolling down his cheek as he did.

 

Fenris watched Anders leave, and a huge wave of relief came over him. The mage left her, and even more, she didn’t deny that she loved him. He felt confused and tormented, but thought that perhaps this was fate. After suffering for years, the Maker was finally granting him a chance at happiness; a chance at redemption. Hawke was that redemption. He yearned for her, ached for her, every night for three years, and now, they could be together at last. 

"You...you love me?” he finally asked.

Hawke looked at him, wide-eyed. He cupped her face tenderly and she let a tear fall. “I didn’t mean for any of this... it wasn’t supposed to happen like this.”

“Shh,” Fenris wrapped his arms around her, bringing her close. “I will take care of you, Hawke. I am yours.”

“But....Anders,” she whimpered, and the mage’s name tore at his heart. He backed away from her slowly.

“What of him? He is gone, and I am here, as I should be.”

“That doesn’t mean I love him any less than I did before, Fenris.”

“Is that so? So you do not love me then?” he said, feeling dejected.

“I do love you.” More tears fell from her eyes.

"So you love both of us half as much as you should."

"No, I love both of you completely and totally. The thought of losing either of you kills me. I have never loved anyone as much as I love each of you."

“That's not how it works, Hawke." 

"Maybe it does. Maybe my heart just got bigger when you walked into my life."

Fenris threw a hand through his hair and shook his head. “No, this is wrong.” He began to pace back and forth, aggravated at the situation.

“Fenris, please calm down.”

“Calm down? How am I supposed to ‘calm down’ when you just confessed that you love me? And the abomination; you love him too! This is nonsense, Hawke. It is either me or him. Which is it?”

“I will not choose.” she said firmly.

“I....I have to go.”

“Fenris, please,” she begged him, but it was no use. He quickly stormed through the front door, leaving Hawke to fall to her knees and weep. 

Her whole world felt as if it had fallen apart. Just that morning, she was given the news that she would be a mother, and now, she was left to raise the baby by herself, all because of one damn kiss. She had no family left, no one to hold her hand. She had never felt more alone in her entire life. 

 

Anders sat at the bar, downing drink after drink.

“Another, please,” he lifted his hand, but his eyes were glued to his empty mug in front of him that he ordered not five minutes earlier. Corff filled up another mug, and passed it to him. Anders brought it to his lips, drinking half of its contents in one gulp. He lazily wiped his mouth with his arm.

‘It is good that she is gone. Now you can focus on the task at hand.’ Justice’s voice played in his ears.

‘I love her. It’s not like I can just forget she exists. It’s not that simple, Justice.’ Anders thought.

‘She was a distraction and you know it. She was not your purpose for being in Kirkwall.’

‘She became my purpose. You couldn’t possibly understand what she meant to me. Do you really think I can just move on and forget, when she is with the elf? I will be distracted more than ever now.’

‘Let her move on. You knew this day was coming. I heard every doubt in your mind about her. The time to act is now.’

“Hey Blondie! When did you get here?” Varric smacked Anders on the shoulder, and hopped up on the bar stool beside him.

“About an hour ago, give or take.”

“Why so glum? You have that same look on your face the last time I saw you in here, only now I think your face could put Broody to shame.” Anders took another swig of his mug, his stomach turning at the mention of Fenris’ nickname.

“I don’t really want to talk about it, Varric.”

“Come on, we can have a card game in my suite. Take your mind off whatever's bothering you. I’ll even put you on my tab.”

“I suppose one game couldn’t hurt.”

An hour later, Anders had spilled his guts about everything. He knew there was a good reason he didn’t drink. He told the dwarf about how Hawke and him couldn’t conceive, how they used Fenris as a donor, and now how she had fallen for him and how he left. He even told Varric that he was at the Hanged Man the last time so that her and Fenris could sleep together. Anders palmed his face, feeling the lowest he had ever felt in his entire life.

"Shit, Blondie. If it makes you feel any better, I'm married to a crossbow." Varric said as he pat him on the back.

"But the woman I love is with another!"

"You're breakin' my heart. I'm only gonna say it once more: crossbow." The next thing Anders said was completely mumbled, his head falling lower into his lap. It was obvious to Varric that the mage had drank his limit, and was about to pass out in his suite. 

“Okay, that’s enough for you. Let’s get you home.”

“But I don’t have a home anymore.” he whimpered. Varric sighed.

“Alright, you can crash here tonight. But not in my bed -” Before he had even finished the sentence Anders had plopped himself over onto the bed, his legs hanging over the edge. Varric simply shook his head and went down the stairs, to tell Isabela all about what Anders had just told him. 

 

Fenris paced in front of his fireplace, downing a bottle of wine. He had already smashed the one he finished a few minutes prior, plus he knocked over two plants and there was a new hole in the living room’s wall. His knuckles were raw and bleeding, but he hadn’t even noticed. Nothing compared to the pain that he felt in his heart. Not even the torture Danarius subjected him to, day in and out held a candle to what he was going through now. 

He didn’t want a piece of Hawke’s heart, he wanted it all. And if she loved him like she claimed, why shouldn't he be allowed to have it? He waited three desperate years to touch her again, and that abomination left her! Why would she deny him now? She was going to have his child. If she loved him and she was having his baby, she should be with him. Why should the mage even be involved at all? He was becoming downright furious with Hawke, and the situation at hand. How dare she put him in this situation? How dare she tell him that she loved him when they couldn’t be together? That damned woman and her stubbornness, her flawless skin, her luscious lips... 

Fenris became lost in his thoughts of adoration for her as he began to reflect on all of the passionate nights they recently shared together. Long ago he accepted that he was going to spend his life alone, die alone. But she opened his heart and he thought just maybe he could be happy. He sunk to his chair and shook his head. He needed Hawke, he felt empty without her. Fenris didn’t know what his next move was going to be, all he knew was that the thought of living without her was unbearable and he would rather die than be without her gentle touch and beautiful smile. She owned his heart, even if he only had half of hers.


	7. A Reunion

Three days was torture enough for Hawke to finally seek out the two men. She was confused and torn. Her heart wanted both of them; two very different, complex men who did not care for one another. Neither Anders nor Fenris had come to her, and being inside of her mind another minute was too much to bear. She had been holed up in her mansion, pacing back and forth during the day. At night she was a crying mess, feeling lost and alone. Not to mention her morning sickness had kicked in, which seemed more like all day sickness to her. 

Varric came to check up on her the day after Anders left. He told her about the mage’s drunken night in his suite, and that the truth was out in the open now. She felt ashamed, thinking that her friends would shun her, but Varric was nothing but supportive. He informed her that Anders was staying at his clinic.

No one seemed to know anything on Fenris however. Hawke assumed he would be locked away in his mansion, just as she was. Probably drowning his worries with a bottle of wine. She would talk to Fenris first, as he was closer, and then she would go to Anders. She needed to know that they were both alright, for peace of mind. 

She knocked on Fenris’ door, and it wasn’t long before he opened. 

“Hawke? What are you doing here?”

“What do you think I’m doing here? Can I come inside? Please.” Fenris stepped aside and let her in. “I think we need to talk.”

“Hawke...”

“I’ve been going out of my mind the past three days. Please say something. Anything.”

"I've already told you how I feel about the situation. I am unhappy. What more do you wish to know?"

“I don’t know. I feel like I’ve just made a big mess of everything. I don’t want you to hate me.” He looked up at her, with eyes that held a painful expression.

“I could never hate you. Do not think such things.”

“I didn’t mean to drag you into this. If I had known...if I had known what would have happened, I would have never asked you to do it in the first place.”

“So you regret it then?”

“Yes...I mean no! I...I don’t know.” She stumbled on the words. Did she regret it? She certainly regretted what she did to both Fenris and Anders, but all those nights with Fenris, all those times he held her close in his arms, she could never regret those moments. They would always be dear to her heart. 

"If you don't know, then there is nothing more to discuss." Hawke felt dizzy suddenly, and her heart seemed to stop. His words felt dismissive, almost as if he didn’t care anymore. She knew in her mind that he was probably just hurting, but so was she. So much that she could hardly stand it. But if he wanted her to go, she would not pester him any longer. 

“Very well then, Fenris.” Hawke turned to leave, but before she did, she turned her head over her shoulder. “Just know that I am truly sorry for any pain that I’ve caused, and if you never want to see me again, I will understand.” She left his mansion, feeling an icy cold grip on her heart. Her feet led her to Darktown, much longer than it would have normally taken her. She had to force herself to move, her entire body felt as if it were glued to the ground, each step heavier than the last. 

When she arrived at the clinic, the lantern was on, which meant he was accepting patients. She opened the door to see that he was alone, writing on a piece of paper. She closed the door behind her and he turned to see who had entered. When he noticed her nearing, he looked back down.

“So you tore yourself away from Fenris long enough to come and give me your pity?” 

“I came to see how you’ve been. I’ve been a mess without you.” Hawke admitted, feeling her body tremble at his cold demeanor. She had never seen Anders in such a way. His hair was a mess, he hadn’t shaved for days, and he had dark circles under his bloodshot eyes.

“I’m sure he’s been there to pick up the pieces.”

“I haven’t been with Fenris. He left right after you did.” Anders finally looked up from his seat, his eyes staring into hers.

“You mean, you’ve been alone these last three days?”

“Yes. I have. And it’s not been easy. Anders, I thought that getting pregnant would have brought us closer together, not tear us apart. I am really sorry for what happened.”

“Maybe you should go, Hawke.” He said, looking down again. She felt defeated. She would be raising this baby all alone now, and it suddenly felt like a curse. Hawke turned to leave, but then felt his hand on her arm.

“How have you been feeling?”

“I beg your pardon?”

“Your pregnancy. I’m still a healer, Hawke. Tell me, how has your body been reacting?”

“Oh...well, I have been pretty nauseous. And I haven’t been sleeping well, but I think that’s from everything else that’s been going on.”

“Nor have I. Here, let me properly examine you. I didn’t get the chance to last time. I want to make sure everything’s okay.” He took her hand and helped her onto a cot, and she laid back. Anders walked to the entrance of the clinic, opened the door briefly, and blew out the lantern. He returned to her. He stood by where her head was, placing his finger tips under her jaw.

“Glands feel normal. Not swollen.” He said, matter-of-factly. “Pulse seems fine as well.” He walked over to a table and grabbed a blanket, and placed it on top of her. “I need you to lose the clothes. I won’t look.” He said, turning away.

“Anders, it’s me. I’m not just one of your regular patients.”

“Hawke, please,” he said quietly, still facing away. She huffed and quickly tossed her robe, and smalls to the floor. She didn’t wear a breast band on this day, as her flesh was too sore for the restriction. She pulled the blanket to her neck and cleared her throat.

“I’m ready.” Anders came to her side and pulled the sheet down, exposing her naked chest. His hands lightly touched her, and she cringed even at his gentleness.

“That tender?” he asked, palming one breast, moving it in his hands as if he were trying to feel for something. She nodded, and he repeated the same action with the other. Anders moved the sheet lower, now examining her abdomen. He pressed down, his fingers searching for something.

“I’m going to have to do an internal exam now, if you don’t mind.”

“Go ahead. It’s not like you’ve never seen me naked before,” she teased, but Anders kept the serious expression on his face. He covered her upper half again and lifted the bottom of the sheet to her stomach, exposing her to the cool air. Anders grabbed her knees and bent them, spreading her apart. He paused a moment, taking in a short sharp breath. The same sound he made often when she undressed for him. The same sound an aroused man would make. Anders cleared his throat, and then continued in his professional manner. 

“Okay, Hawke, this might feel a little uncomfortable. Try to relax.” With one hand, he pressed down on her pelvis as two fingers entered her. With the hand on her pelvis, it met with the fingers that pushed up inside her. Hawke tensed up a little. His touch was clinical, like a doctor’s, and not like a lover’s.

“Well, you’re about five or six weeks along by my guess. And my guess is seldom wrong.” He said with a smirk on his face. Hawke clutched her hands at her sides, as he removed his fingers from her.   
She expected him to cover her up again, but instead his hand remained on her folds, gently touching her outer lips. She peered up at his face, and saw that he was tenderly staring down at her body.

“Maker, you’re beautiful.” She sighed as he began to kiss her thighs, his fingers stroking her folds, letting one enter her damp core again. This time his touch was gentle and enticing, nothing like his professional probing a minute earlier. “Is this okay, darling?”

“Yes,” she whimpered, feeling tears spring to her eyes. She feared that she would never feel his touch again. He noticed, and he climbed up on the cot, and held her in his arms.

“Shh, I’m here,” he said softly, stroking her hair.

“Oh, Anders.” she sighed, as he claimed her lips. Their tongues meshed together, both needy for one another. His hand found her entrance again and this time two fingers slipped in. She groaned, and began to unbuckled his robes. She slid them off his body and he was quick to assist her with his trousers and small clothes, kicking them off and letting them fall to the clinic’s floor.

“I need you, Hawke. I need you to breathe,” he groaned, as he climbed in between her legs and entered her. They both cried out, as he began to thrust into her, taking her at a slow pace. Anders lowered his face, and pressed his lips to hers again.

He began to move, and it made her feel so full. Hawke's nails dug into his back, and she held on tight as he took her over and over again. She thrust her hips upwards, to meet him halfway. They both sighed with pleasure, and Hawke wrapped one hand around his neck, bringing him close to her.

His tongue moved over her nipples and she hummed in delight. "Ohh, Anders." she panted, her inner walls clenching tightly around his hard member. She moaned into his mouth, feeling his hips meet hers each time he bore down on her.

Their lovemaking was slow and tender. His lips barely left hers, and when she climaxed, he soon followed her. When they were finished, they both quietly got dressed. Hawke wasn’t sure what this meant. Were they back together? He must have read the look on her face, because he grabbed her hand and looked her in the eyes.

“So after I left, you and Fenris never...?”

“No. I think he’s furious with me. He asked me to chose, between you and him and I...I said I couldn’t. Oh, I must sound terrible. I’ve been with you for three years. How could I even say such a thing?” She started to scold herself, feeling terribly guilty.

“So you really do love us both?” She nodded, staring at her feet. “Can I ask you one more thing love?”

“Yes.”

“Can I come back home tonight? I miss our bed. And you.”

“Of course, Anders.”

“Alright. I need to finish up here, but I will see you tonight.”

 

It was getting dark out when Anders left his clinic. He stewed in his thoughts all day. Hawke had given him much to think about. Before she came to see him, he assumed that Fenris replaced him, that she had long since forgotten him, and that they would be one happy family while he was left to himself. Hearing that she hadn’t just moved on, and that she still missed him, it spoke to him in volumes. Hawke was in love with Fenris, it was true, but she still loved him as well.

He thought about the past few months, how he had shared his woman, his bed, and his home with the elf. What if it became a permanent arrangement? How would he feel then? He certainly didn’t mind before, in fact he had rather enjoyed adding a third to their intimacy. Would it be much different now? Fenris could care for Hawke when he was busy with patients, or his plans with the mage underground. As long as Anders didn’t get left out in the cold for the elf, he could see this being a solution to their problem. Hawke had a big heart, she was always helping those in need. Was it so surprising that she could love more than one person at a time? Anders took a deep breath, and headed for Hightown, but it was not Hawke’s estate that he was going to first. No. He needed to confront the elf.

To Anders surprise, Fenris let him inside right away. He stood there in silence for a moment, until Fenris spoke up.

“I assume you wanted to talk about Hawke.” 

Anders laughed nervously. “I suppose you could say that. I’m moving back in with Hawke tonight.”

“And you came to gloat?” he asked coldly.

“No, I’ve come up with a solution for our problem here. Hawke loves both of us. I love her. And I assume you do as well.” He paused a moment, waiting for an answer, but when Fenris was silent, he continued.

“I don’t want to see her hurting. Not for any reason, and I know how much you mean to her. I was able to get over any insecurities I once had about you when we made our arrangement. And I enjoyed it. You seemed to as well. So what I am proposing is to make it a more permanent solution.”

“What are you saying, mage?”

“What I am asking, elf, is if you would be willing to share, Hawke, in more ways than one?”

“You mean share her heart.” he stated, more than asked.

“I guess that’s one way of putting it. Share her home, her bed, whichever. There will be a baby soon, and you will be around then. So be there for her now. Comfort her, care for her. Love her, the way she loves you.”

“Answer me this; how does this not bother you, that she will love another? You have been with her for years. I only have for two months, and I cannot even fathom it.”

“Because, I care about her enough to understand that she is capable of loving more than one person. I wasn’t crazy about letting you into our bed at first, but I grew to accept it, and even enjoy it. Who am I fooling? I loved it. Maybe this won’t be so different.”

“I’m not sure I can do this, share Hawke as if she is just some possession.”

“That’s not what I’m saying.”

“It does not matter. The idea is strange to me.”

“I only came to ask. You don’t need to agree to anything. I’ll be on my way now.”

Anders left and went back to the estate. He mentioned nothing to Hawke. He didn’t want to get her hopes up in case Fenris declined. That was, until a few evenings later. 

He observed Hawke over the next few days. Even though she seemed content that their relationship had mended, every now and then he would see that distant look in her eyes, and he knew that Fenris was in her thoughts. It was then he realised that he hoped Fenris would come to her. He didn’t want to see her suffering any longer. 

They were sitting together in her study, about to retire for the evening, when there was a knock at the door. Right away, Hawke knew who it was. She knew from the knock alone. She glanced at Anders.

“I think it’s Fenris,” she said, standing up awkwardly.

“Answer it. I’ll be in here.”

Hawke opened her front door, and there he was. His eyes set on her right away, and he strode in.

"I have been tearing myself apart for the last week. I'm tired of the pain, Hawke. It's all I've ever known and the thought of sharing you with someone else is like a knife in my chest, but the alternative is so much worse."

“Sharing me?” She asked, completely confused.

“That’s right.” Anders said, stepping towards them. “I asked Fenris if he would join us. Permanently.”

“Wh..what?” she asked, utterly confused. Fenris placed a hand tenderly on her face and looked her in the eyes. 

“I need you, Hawke. Please.” The look in his eyes was loving and she felt herself melting in his gaze.

“But how will this even work?”

“Well, there would be some ground rules.” Anders said, stepping to her side. “Fenris will be here with you more frequently than I. So I would like some alone time with you, naturally. But other than that, you have us both at your disposal.” He said with a smile and a wink.

“Won’t that make either of you jealous? I don’t understand how this could work in the long run.”

“I don’t get jealous so easily these days.” Anders chuckled. 

“Fenris?” she asked, turning her attention to him.

“You are having my child. I want to be here for everything. I will overcome any obstacles necessary to to have you at my side.”

“You’re really both okay with this?”

“Let us show you.” Fenris growled, claiming her lips quickly. She sighed into his mouth, and soon felt Anders behind her. He kissed the back of her neck, and then pulled her to him, his lips on hers now. Hawke felt two pairs of hands, caressing her body. Two sets of lips, grazing her skin. She didn’t know how she made it to her bed or who carried her, but soon she was naked, and making love to the two men she cared about more than anything in the entire world.


	8. Boys Interrupted

Hawke was bathing in the afterglow of the wonderful bliss she just experienced from her two men. Hers. That’s what they both wanted to be. She closed her eyes and pleasantly exhaled, making a small contented noise as she did. Anders laughed.

“Happy, are we?”

“Very.” She opened her eyes and witnessed Fenris quietly putting on his clothes. “Fenris?” she asked. “Where are you going?”

“I thought you would require me to leave now.”

“I did ask you to stay with us permanently.” Anders replied, matter-of-factly.

“Stay here?” Fenris asked, his eyes directed at the bed, staring at it as if it were the lion’s den. Hawke caught on to this, and she sat up.

“Would you like me to set up a room of your own?”

“That would be most appreciated, if it is not too much to ask.”

“Your servants are taking up all your spare rooms, love.” Anders interjected. Hawke looked at Fenris, a man who loved her, even if he had not said it in such words. He was doing something huge for her, so she decided to do something for him in return.

“You can have my mother’s old room. Not like it’s being used for anything else.” Hawke hadn’t the heart to so much as go into her mother’s room since her passing three years prior. It had been too painful. Her servants kept it clean, washing the sheets every so often and dusting the surfaces, but up until now, Hawke could not fathom changing anything about it.

“Are you sure?” Fenris asked.

“Yes, I am positive.” She got out of bed, and threw on a housecoat, before taking Fenris by the hand, and leading him to the room across the hall. She paused a moment, staring at the big wooden door before her.

“Hawke, this is unnecessary. I do not need this room.”

“No, Fenris. Let me do this for you. Please. It’s only a room.”

“I will treat it with the utmost respect, I swear of it.” Hawke smiled at him and gave his hand a squeeze. She opened the door, and stepped inside the room for the first time in years. The room was exactly as she remembered it. It was just slightly smaller than her room, with a double bed. The shelves were covered with knick-knacks and little antiques that her mother adored, along with some books.

“I’ll go get Bodahn so he can get a fire started. It’s cold in here.”

“Nonsense, Hawke. I will not have you making a fuss over me. I can start my own fire.”

“If you insist.”

“I do.” He said, and pulled her in for a kiss. His lips were warm and moist against her soft supple ones. “I will be here if you need me Hawke. Go rest now. You had a busy night.”

Hawke felt a little guilty, leaving him in her mother’s old room. But it would do for now. Fenris was a man of his privacy, and she knew he would appreciate the space now and then. She hopped back into bed with Anders, and he wrapped his arms around her.

“Everything settled now?”

“Mhmm.” She closed her eyes, and lay her head on his chest. Anders kissed her forehead and smiled.

“Good then. Sweet dreams, sweetheart.” 

 

Hawke awoke in the middle of the night, with one thought on her mind: Fenris. Was he doing alright? Did he think that she favoured Anders for going to bed with him? And what if this was too much for him, and he left in the middle of the night? She couldn’t put these thoughts out of her mind. She quietly got out of the bed, and walked across the hall. She stood in front of the bedroom door a few minutes, and started to second-guess herself. Disturbing him in the middle of the night wasn’t what she wanted. She knocked on the door quietly, and heard some rustling of sheets and then the door opened. Fenris’ hair was pointing in different directions, and he looked half awake.

“Hawke, is everything alri -” She claimed his lips with hers, and pushed him back into the room, closing the door behind her. He was still there, still hers. Her arms wrapped around his neck, and she rest her face against his bare chest.

“I missed you.”

“Already?” he chuckled. “But it’s only been a few hours.”

“I know.” she smiled. She crossed over to the bed - her mother’s old bed - and laid down on it with him. She felt a little strange being in her bed with him, Hawke’s lover, and he could sense her stiffness right away.

“You don’t have to be here with me tonight. You have a more than comfortable bed across the hall. I’m not going anywhere.”

“But I want to be with you.” she said tenderly, as she nuzzled her head into his chest again.

“Alright. That’s it.” He said, lifting her into his arms.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m coming to bed with you.” She began to giggle, then stifled her laughter when they entered the other room. He gently placed her on the bed, and she climbed in next to Anders, Fenris following her so she was lying in between the two of them. Anders was in a deep sleep, and was snoring loudly. Fenris stared at him, with an amused look on his face.

“Is the mage always so alluring when he sleeps?”

“Afraid to break it to you, but I’m not much better.”

“Wonderful. I find myself in a bed with two mages who saw logs in their sleep. Anything else you’d care to tell me?” He teased. As if on cue, Anders began to mumble in his sleep.

“No, you’ve got it all wrong. The dwarves only wear dresses on Sundays.”

Fenris raised an eyebrow at Hawke and she quietly giggled again.

“He also talks in his sleep. And occasionally wakes me up with his nightmares, being a Grey Warden and all.”

“I have to question why you haven’t slept in that other room before. Just thinking about all this is giving me a headache.”

“I guess I got used to it.” She shrugged, laying back down, and turned her body so she was facing Fenris. They stared at one another for a few moments, when a sleeping Anders threw his arm around Hawke and was now snoring directly in her ear. Fenris shook his head and a smile crept on his face. Hawke grabbed one of his hands, and intertwined her fingers in his.

“Thank you for doing this for me.”

“For sharing a bed with the most obnoxious mage ever?”

“For everything.”

Soon after, Hawke was able to close her eyes and fall back asleep. It took Fenris much longer however, now that there were two people snoring instead of one. He eventually threw a pillow over his head to drown out the noise, and that’s when sleep came to him.

 

Hawke woke up before the both of them. To her left was Anders, and on the right was Fenris. Both men were sleeping peacefully, and she decided she wanted to do something nice for them; breakfast in bed. She tiptoed out of the room and went down to the kitchen to prepare their meal.

She began making eggs and it occurred to her that she had no idea how Fenris liked his done. Anders loved scrambled, and she wondered if Fenris would be okay with it as well. She would have to ask him later. She knew he was not a picky eater at all, as long as it wasn’t fish. She gathered up the scrambled eggs and toasted bread on two plates, and made her way up the stairs. When she opened the door, she almost dropped the food all over her floor at the sight before her.

Apparently, neither man had fully woken up and realised that she was gone. They were embracing each other in their sleep, their limbs intertwined. Anders had his arm wrapped around Fenris, and the elf’s head was snuggled onto Anders’ chest. It was as if she were watching a horrific scene about to unfold before her. But try as she may, she could not look away. Hawke bit down on her lip, trying her best not to laugh. They were not going to take this well, she knew it. She cleared her throat loudly, and when they both slightly stirred, she spoke up.

“Uh boys...am I interrupting something?”

Anders opened his eyes and looked down, while Fenris slowly came to. It was as if someone threw a bucket of venomous snakes at the two; their eyes both went wide at exactly the same time, and they both bolted away from each other as quickly as possible, Anders falling off the bed and onto his naked ass. Hawke began to laugh hysterically, having to put the plates down on the nearby table, for fear of dropping them. 

“I hardly find this funny, Hawke.” Fenris growled, sitting at the far edge of the bed.

“Oh Maker...” she said in between laughs. “You both squealed like....little girls!” she was holding her sides, tears streaming down her face.

“Well, thank you very much for letting me know he joined us last night.” Anders said, now smiling a little. He was able to laugh at himself, but Fenris however, was much more embarrassed. His cheeks were turning red and his eyes narrowed.

“I do not enjoy being mocked, Hawke.” 

She tried to stop laughing, she really did, but the image of them scrambling away from each other with Anders falling right out of bed was too much.

“I’m not...mocking..” She burst out laughing again, even more now. “Oh I can’t breathe, it’s too much.” The tips of his elven ears went scarlet, and he hopped out of the bed, striding across the room to leave.

“Oh, come on now, no sense of humor?” Anders chuckled.

“Fenris please...don’t...go!” Hawke said, still giggling. They both heard the front door slam shut and Hawke finally stopped her laughing fit, fear now taking over. Anders saw the look on her face.

“Oh, he’ll be back. He doesn’t even have a shirt on.” 

Hawke groaned. “Well, no breakfast in bed for him!”

 

Later that afternoon, Hawke was back in bed, curled up into a ball. Shortly after Fenris left and Anders ate his breakfast, he made his way to the clinic. That’s when her morning sickness hit her. She had spent a good chunk of her day being sick, and now her entire body ached. She heard her bedroom door being opened, and only groaned at the sound. She couldn’t even lift her head to see who it was.

“Hawke?” It was Fenris, and she felt him sit on the bed beside her. “Are you alright?”

“Pregnancy is kicking my arse right now. Let me die in peace.” She whined, and buried her head in her hands.

“Have you been suffering like this alone?”

“Anders had work to do.”

“I should have been here. I am sorry.”

“Where did you go, Fenris?” she mumbled, still covering her face with an arm.

“I brought a box of my things over from my mansion. I didn’t mean to leave like that. It’s just - “ He took a deep breath. “I was often laughed at, and ridiculed when I was a slave. It brought uncomfortable memories.”

“Fenris,” Hawke sighed. “I wasn’t mocking you.”

“I know. Forgive me?” he asked, and picked up one of her hands, giving it a few quick kisses. Hawke simply moaned, still feeling terribly. Fenris laid beside her, and began to rub her back gently.

“Is this helping?”

“A little,” she smiled weakly. “Thank you, Fenris.”

“Anything to please you, Hawke.”

 

Hawke felt ill for the rest of the day, and Fenris never left her side. Again that night, he stayed in their bed, even when Anders returned later that evening. She woke up in the middle of the night feeling much better, with Anders snoring beside her on one side, and Fenris breathing quietly on the other. There was just one problem with this scenario; she was terribly aroused. 

Hawke noticed since she became pregnant, she was having lusty dreams. But usually when she awoke, she felt sated. But now, oh it was unbearable. She was already naked, as she had to take off her clothing before bed, as she was feeling warm. Both her lovers were fast asleep, and she did not have the heart to wake them. She would be quick, and quiet, she told herself. She let her right hand snake down her body, and closed her eyes as she began to rub her clit. She sighed quietly, feeling completely relieved of the uncomfortable pinching that was persisting a moment ago. 

Her mind drifted to the two men beside her who were sleeping away. She thought of Fenris’ gentle touch, scaling down to her core, and Anders’ experienced lips, kissing every inch of her. She began to pant quietly, drenching her fingers, when she felt a pair of lips kissing her neck, and a tongue lapping at one of her nipples. Her eyes shot open, to see it was Fenris tending to her breast and Anders kissing her. She suddenly felt embarrassed.

“You have two capable men in bed with you, Hawke,” Anders teased, and moved down to take her other nipple in his mouth.

“Oh Maker.” she groaned, and closed her eyes, enjoying the feeling. She could feel Fenris twitching beside her, and when she looked at him, she could see his was stroking his erection, while moaning into her breast.

“Let me help you with that.” she smirked, and then took his cock into her mouth. An animalistic grunt came from his lips, as she bobbed her head up and down on his member.

Anders kissed his way down her stomach, until he reached her sopping wet mound. He breathed in her scent, before running his tongue along her lips. She shuddered beneath him, and he could hear the slurping sounds her mouth made as she sucked Fenris. He felt his own erection twitch as he began to lick her clit.

Hawke moaned loudly into Fenris’ hard member, and thrashing under Anders’ ministrations. She had a hard time focusing on one or the other, her pleasure was so great. Fenris turned her head sideways, and began to make shallow thrusts into her mouth, so she could lay back and enjoy what Anders was doing. The mage now had two fingers plunging in and out of her entrance. Tasting Fenris on her lips, while Anders tasted her was making her all the more aroused. It was such an erotic act to her. She could feel the way Anders was moving at the edge of the bed as he went down on her, and she knew that he was masturbating as he pleasured her. He did it so often, so many times he would get himself off while making her cum. Anders loved to please, just as much as he loved to dominate. Hawke knew she was a lucky girl indeed.

Fenris’ movements became a little more frantic, as he jerked into her mouth faster now. She moaned around him, and each time she did, he sighed.

“So good, you’re so good, Hawke.” He told her, stroking her dark locks. Her inner muscles clenched up, she could feel that she was getting closer to completion. Anders suddenly stopped what he was doing, and she whimpered at the loss of his mouth on her most sensitive spot. That soon changed, as he drove his cock into her, and rubbed her nub with a finger. He was on his knees, in a kneeling position as he swayed his hips back and forth into her tight hole.

“Cum on my cock.” he groaned, making it sound more like a demand than a request. His aggressive voice along with the tension that was already built up inside of her brought her release forward. She groaned as she coated his throbbing member with her juices, and he soon followed her, crying out her name. 

Fenris thrust into her mouth, the tip of his member pressing against her slippery tongue each time. Hawke heard how his breathing quickened, and she knew he was close. With a hand, she gently massaged his sack, and as soon as she did, he pulled out, and jets of his semen dropped onto her heaving chest. She moaned at the sensation, feeling the warm liquid coat her breasts. She playfully rubbed it in a little, and both men groaned. 

Anders grabbed a nearby cloth and tossed it to the elf, who wiped her clean. Hawke stretched her arms, and rest them under her head and hummed a delightful noise.

“Content now?” Anders asked, settling in beside her again.

“Oh yes. Much better.”

“Will you revert to your own hand next time, or are you a little wiser after this experience?” Fenris teased, laying down next to her.

“Oh after tonight, I am sure I will be keeping you boys up often. Especially if I keep having such sexy dreams.”

“It’s the hormones.” Anders chuckled. “Eight more months of this to go. I think somehow we will manage.”

“Okay, enough talk. I’m tired now.”

“You’re tired? I’m the one that has to be up soon to open the clinic.”

“Shut up mage, and let her sleep.” 

“Shh!” Hawke giggled, and found their hands on either side of her. She intertwined her fingers in both, and drifted off to sleep.


	9. Cherries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A bit of Toppy Hawke in this chapter, plus, some more drama, cause that's how I roll :P

“No no, the nail is supposed to go over here.”

“I don’t care what you say mage, I am looking at the picture. It goes here.”

“If we follow your ‘directions’, we will end up with a drawer, not a crib!”

“Will you two stop already?” Hawke groaned. She was now four months pregnant, and was just beginning to show. A tiny bump protruded from her small frame. She sat across the bedroom, in her new rocking chair, attempting to supervise Fenris and Anders while they built their baby’s crib. It was a near deathmatch when they made her the rocking chair. “I’m pretty sure Fenris has the right idea Anders, but hey, what do I know?”

Fenris smirked and Anders pouted as the elf grabbed the hammer from him and began to hit down at the nail. Anders stood up and strolled over to where Hawke was sitting, and kneeled before her. He ran his hands over her calves, and began to knead them. She closed her eyes and hummed a pleasant sound.

“Still sore?” He asked.

“Won’t be for long if you keep that up.” He chuckled, and Fenris shook his head, still working on the crib that Anders had abandoned to dote over Hawke. He grabbed her hand and planted a kiss on her hand.

“I must be off to the clinic soon.” 

“So when you said you wanted to make a crib, what you really meant was you wanted me to do it.” Fenris growled.

“Hey, I helped. Not my fault that there are sick refugees.”

“Go on. It will be fine.” Hawke assured him, more or less to stop their bickering before it turned into a full blown argument once more. Anders stood, and leaned forward, placing a small kiss on her forehead. 

“I will return tonight.” He glanced at Fenris. “Take care of her.”

“I always do.” Fenris responded, with a smirk on his face, implying that all of Hawkes needs were taken care of while he was away. Anders shook his head, and left. 

“You know Fenris, it’s not a contest. I wish the two of you wouldn’t egg each other on so much.” 

“I have been trying. He just infuriates me so.” Fenris said, his cheeks turning pink. Hawke strode over to him, and cupped his face. Her hands were cool on his face. 

“I know you have. And thank you for being so patient.” Fenris pulled her down onto his lap, and began kissing her passionately. She wrapped her arms around his neck and held him closer. She nipped at his lower lip, tugging on it with her teeth. Fenris groaned, and Hawke lightly bit down his neck, lifting his shirt off. 

“But the crib...” Fenris began.

“Fuck the crib,” she panted, kissing his lips again. “Fuck me.” Fenris instantly grew hard, and Hawke pushed herself down against his erection, grinding her hips against it. She stood up, grabbing his arm, pulling him up with her. Hawke shoved him backwards, striding confidently, until the back of his knees hit the bed and he fell onto it. Fenris stared at her, bewildered.

“A new side to you I haven’t seen.” he grinned. It was true, she had actively been the submissive participant in their sex life, but she had the sudden urge to be in control.

“Must be the hormones talking.” she said, sinking to her knees in front of him. She unlaced his leggings, and tightly grabbed ahold of the waistband, pulling them down along with his smallclothes. Firmly, she stroked his erect member up and down, unleashing a moan from within him. His eyes rolled back and she smiled.

“Hmmm, like this, do you?” She asked, as she took the tip of him into her mouth. Hawke sank down into him, and Fenris gripped firmly onto the sheets. Her tongue swept against the underside of his cock, as she moved her head up and down on him. 

“Hawke.” he groaned, his breathing becoming more laboured. She gazed up at him with her bright blue eyes, and slowly pulled her mouth off of him.

“I don’t want you to finish yet. Not until you’ve earned it.” Hawke winked, standing up. “Undress me.” she softly requested, to gauge his reaction more than anything. She was relieved when a huge grin plastered across his face, as he stood to satisfy her request. His skilled hands gently opened her robe, unlacing it and letting it fall to the ground. He kneeled in front of her, his head in front of her belly, as he pulled her underclothes to the floor, and she stepped out of them. His face was so close to her heat now, she could feel his breath on her.

“Taste me,” she demanded, and right away he complied. He stuck out his tongue, and lightly licked her slit. Hawke grabbed a fist full of his hair, pushing him forward so he was further buried into her. He groaned, as he licked her faster, running his slick tongue up and down her swollen nub. His hand reached around to grab her ass, as he pulled her forward, pushing his tongue into her dampness.

“Maker, Fenris, don’t stop!” she squealed, as he fucked her with his tongue. Each time he pressed into her, his nose hit against her clit, bringing her closer and closer. Finally, she felt her knees go weak, and she held onto his shoulders for support as her orgasm swept over her. She called out his name, soaking his tongue with her juices, as he moaned and continued to push his tongue in and out of her entrance. Her breathing slowed, and she looked down at the elf, who was still busy pleasuring her, waiting for her to tell him otherwise. She smiled at this, and gently pushed his head away. 

“Lie on the bed.” she directed. Fenris did as she said, laying his head against the pillows. Hawke climbed into his lap, hovering above his stiff member. With her hands on his shoulders, she lowered herself onto him, as he sunk all the way into her in one movement. They both cried out simultaneously. 

“Hawke.” he said again, it was more of a plea than anything.

“Yes, Fenris? Is there something you want?” She toyed with him.

“I need...you to move.” 

A mischievous grin spread across her face. “Maybe if you ask nicely, I will.”

“Please.” he begged immediately. 

“Please what?”

“Please fuck me.”

“Good boy,” she sighed, and began to bounce up and down on his shaft. Fenris moaned loudly, as she bucked her hips wildly into his. Her hands found his nipples, and she began to pinch them, causing him to hiss through his teeth. She leaned forward, and kissed him again. Their tongues danced together, both softly moaning into one another. Hawke gripped onto his hands, and lead them to her breasts. He gently squeezed them, knowing how tender they were lately. 

“Fenris,” she sighed, grabbing one of his hands and placing it to her nub. “Touch me here.” He started to rub her once again swollen clit, and she cried out. As he watched her, he began to shake from beneath her. As soon as she saw this, she grabbed his member at the base, and held it tightly.

“Hawke!” he groaned, unhappy with what she had done.

“Not yet.” she said firmly. “You can cum when I tell you.” He hissed, and began to rub her nub quicker now, hoping she would allow him relief if he got her off once more. It worked, because as she felt her release building, she let go of his member.

“Cum for me Fenris,” she cried, and he did. Jets of semen poured into her, as he let out an animalistic sound, thrusting his hips recklessly into her. Together they found their bliss, moving their hips in synchronized movements, ending their session of passion. She slowly rolled off of him, laying on her back, gasping for air. She heard him chuckle beside her.

“Was...was that okay?” She finally asked, turning on her side to face him. 

“It was more than okay.” he responded by stroking her cheek. Hawke let out a sigh of relief.

“Oh good. I don’t know what came over me. I wanted to make sure it didn’t bring any unpleasant memories. About your past.”

“Hawke, there is no way that making love to you could be unpleasant.” He said, resting his head on a hand. His eyes were intense, and Hawke felt as if he could see right through her. “I would travel to the end of the world and back again if it would satisfy you.” He ran his hand over hers, and clasped it close. “I...I love you Hawke.” he said, his eyes casting downwards. She sat upright, her heart thumping in her chest. Fenris never spoke those words to her before, and although she knew how he felt, she never thought she would hear the words leave his lips.

“You...you do?” 

He peered up at her behind a curtain of white hair. “For a long time now. I was only too afraid to admit it to myself, let alone anyone else.”

“I love you too.” She smiled, and climbed atop of him, kissing him with more passion, more velocity than she ever had before. She could feel herself growing lustful again, and the same could be said for the elf underneath her, as he grew harder each passing moment. Fenris thrust his hips up, and slid right into her waiting entrance. This time their lovemaking was slow and tender. To Hawke, it was perfect. 

 

They spent most of their time in bed that day, taking full advantage of her never ending desire. When they were both good and spent, it was beginning to become dark outside. Fenris redressed himself, and began to work at the crib again. He hadn’t spent any longer than a few minutes on it when Hawke began to groan. He looked up at his pregnant love, round with his child, and already knew what was on her mind. She was craving food this time, only Hawke wouldn’t have the gall to flat out ask him for something.

“What is it you wish to eat now, Hawke?” He chuckled. 

“Am I that transparent?” she whined. She lay her head back on her pillow and huffed. “I really want some fresh cherries, but of course there’s none in the house and the market has long since closed.”

“Your neighbors have a cherry tree in their yard, do they not?” He half-grinned, and she sat upright in the bed.

“You have to be joking. Do you know the royal fit the Faraday’s would have if they caught an elf sneaking into their yard in the middle of the night? To steal, nonetheless?”

“I suppose I will have to be extra stealthy then, won’t I?” 

“You wouldn’t!” Hawke began to giggle. Fenris made his way over to her on the bed, encapturing her lips in a kiss.

“I’d do anything for you.” He shot one more look at the unfinished crib and sighed. “If I do not finish that tonight, I know the mage will never let me hear the end of it.”

Hawke laughed. “Probably not.”

“I won’t be long then.” He smiled at Hawke, before making his way down to the kitchen. He grabbed a wicker basket from a drawer and left into the cool night. The Faraday’s estate was just a few houses down, and was as equally lavish as Hawke’s. 

He stealthily hopped over their fence and landed quietly on the grass below. The tree was right there, the thing towered so tall everyone who walked past the house could see it. He reached up and grabbed a couple handfuls of cherries, and dropped them into the basket. There - he thought to himself - no harm done. He held onto the basket, and jumped back over the fence. 

As soon as his feet hit the ground, he was welcomed with a blunt hit to the head. He stumbled a bit, dropping Hawke’s cherries all over the street. He quickly drew his sword. He was surrounded by eight men, all dressed in armor. He recognized no one.

“So you’re the lyrium elf they so desire in Tevinter.” One of the men said. He seemed to be the leader of this band of thugs.

“Where’s that Champion of Kirkwall, elf? She ain’t around to protect you, is she?” another laughed.

“Shame, I’m sure we could get a good price on her, too. Maybe have a few rounds ourselves before handing her over.” 

At that, Fenris lunged towards the offender, his fist immediately driving through his chest, crushing his heart. A blade slashed into his shoulder, and he whipped around, his sword clashing with the enemy’s. He spun around, decapitating another man. Blood splattered across Fenris’ face. An arrow shot into his shoulder, and he howled out in pain.

“Keep him alive. He’s worth nothing if he’s dead!” The leader yelled at his men. Fenris swung his sword like mad, deflecting blades and armour left and right. He took another man down by stabbing him directly through his trachea. The falling enemy gurgled on his own blood as Fenris withdrew his sword. Another arrow pierced through his other shoulder. He could feel an odd tingling sensation on it, burning through his veins.

“Feel that elf? Laced with a potent poison. You will be sleeping like a baby in no time. So why don't you give up now?” 

Fenris growled. He ran full speed at the closest man, and tore through his chest like a wild animal, perhaps the wolf he was named after. He felt the heart combust in his hand, but this outburst only weakened him now, the poison spreading everywhere. He dropped to his knees, his vision blurry. His head hit the hard ground, and he saw the leader’s feet walk towards him.

“Why?” he gasped.

“Ever since your former master perished at your hands, there have been many magisters that wish to attain a slave of your abilities. I think we will be greatly rewarded, by whoever coughs up the most gold. Back to the Imperium, slave.” 

Fenris’ mind was frantic, but his body paralyzed. This couldn’t be happening. Hawke was pregnant with his child. His Hawke, the woman he breathed for. The woman he so desperately loved. He could picture the look of worry on her face, when she realised he was gone. His vision went black, as he dreaded he would never see her again, caress her skin, or hold their baby in his arms.


	10. The Dilemma

Anders was utterly exhausted by the time Hightown came into view. There had been a nasty stomach virus going around Darktown, his patients were practically lined half way to Lowtown. He let out a sigh of relief when he opened the front door. Immediately he heard footsteps coming towards him.

“Oh Fenris I’ve been so worried - “ Hawke stopped dead in her tracks.

“No ‘Hi Anders, how was your day’?”

“Did you see Fenris on your way back?”

“Gee, now my feelings are really hurt.”

“Stop kidding around, Anders. He’s been gone for over two hours.”

“Maybe he just went to the Hanged Man. Surely he wants to get out now and then.”

“No, you don’t get it.” She was becoming frantic, her cheeks were flushed. “I had another stupid craving for those tart cherries I like so much and Fenris offered to get some from the Faraday’s tree.”

“You mean steal them from the Faraday’s tree?”

“Whichever. The point is, it shouldn’t have taken him this long. You know what those people are like. I’ll bet they had him arrested! Oh, I’m going to march down there and give them a piece of my mind!” Hawke hollered, making her way to the door. Anders chased after her into the Hightown street.

“Love, you’re in your housecoat. Don’t you even want to get dressed first?”

“No.”

Anders sighed and tagged along with her. She almost ran to the house. They slowed when they noticed six of the city guard in the area. 

“Great.” Hawke murmured to Anders. “They probably reported him.” She walked past the guards, some of them bowed their heads to her in acknowledgement. She marched up to the Faraday’s door and began to pound on it.

“Open up!” she screamed.

“Hawke, calm down.” Anders said gently and she huffed. The door opened to Sir and Madam Faraday, a middle-aged couple, staring at them with fright. Hawke pushed her way past them into their main hall.

“Alright, where is he?”

“Where is who, Champion?” Madam Faraday asked, her Orlesian accent thick.

“You know damn well who I’m talking about. Fenris. Elf, white hair, big sword, very scowly. You reported him, didn’t you?”

“No one’s been reported and there is no one by the name of Fenris here, I assure you, my dear lady.” Sir Faraday answered.

“Fenris! Are you here?!” she shouted, and Anders put his arm around her, to try and calm her. She whipped herself away from his touch, as if he were the reason that she was upset.

“Champion, please.” The nobleman began.

“Don’t you ‘Champion’ me. I know you caught him in your yard taking those cherries. He only did it because of me. Now will you please tell me where he is?”

“An elf, stealing from our yard? We ought to inform the guard now!” Sir Faraday bellowed and his wife looked disgusted.

“Isn’t that why they’re already standing out there?”

“Goodness no! There was a murder. Four men were killed just outside our door.”

“See, love, he’s not here. Let’s get you back home.” She sighed, leaving the house. The door slammed behind them. 

“It just doesn’t make any sense.” She whined and ran her hands through her hair. They noticed Aveline was there now with her guards. She slowly approached them. 

“Hawke.” She said formally, as she always did, despite their friendship. “I’m assuming you haven't heard what’s happened tonight.” 

“Not really.”

“Four bodies were found. One of them had his heart ripped right from his chest.” She said the last sentence slowly, and all parties knew what that meant. Fenris was involved.

“Have you found out any information on what occurred?” Hawke asked nervously.

“We did find this on one of the bodies.” She handed Hawke a slightly blood covered map. She took it in her hands and scanned over it. It was a map of Thedas, with cities circled and a bunch of x’s marked on possible destinations. 

“It seems whoever these men were, intended to make a last stop in Tevinter.” Anders swallowed hard, and watched as Hawke’s face went white.

“No....” She said, her eyes glued on the map. Anders put his arm around her and a tear fell down her face.

“Slavers.” She whimpered. “But why? Danarius is dead.”

“Danarius was a powerful and well respected magister, from what I have gathered. Maybe someone else wanted what was once his.” Anders responded. 

“We need to find him.” Her voice was quivering with emotion. Anders took her by the shoulders, and looked deep into her blue eyes, which were glistening with tears that threatened to fall.

“You are in no condition to go running after slavers, love.” She pulled away from him, her eyes hardening.

“My condition? There would be no ‘condition’ if it weren’t for Fenris! We have to go after him Anders.” She yelled, and pleaded. Looking at her broke his heart.

“I will go after him. I need you to stay behind and take care of yourself.”

“No, Anders. I’m coming with you.”

“I cannot go on a rescue mission with the love of my life in harm’s way. Think of the baby, Hawke. Please. I promise you, I will leave straight away, but you have to make a promise to me, first. You have to promise me you will stay home. I cannot do this if I am worried about you.”

She looked completely torn, and finally after a few moments, she exhaled deeply. “Fine. Aveline, is there anything you can do to help?”

“I can escort you to the edge of the city, but that’s as far as my duties to the city will allow me, Anders. There is a stable just on the outskirt of Kirkwall that will provide you with a quicker means of transportation.” Anders nodded in agreeance, and Hawke bit her lip. He knew that Hawke hated what she was hearing, but there was no use in arguing any further. Precious time had already been wasted. 

The three of them went back to the Hawke Estate so Anders could gather a few necessities for the trip. 

“Could you go grab my coat, love?” Anders asked.

“Of course.” She went up the stairs, and when she was out of earshot he turned to Aveline.

“I need another favor, Aveline.”

“Go on.”

“I need you to keep an eye on Hawke. Make sure she doesn’t come after us.”

“And just how do you expect me to do that, Anders?”

“You’re a big girl. Stop her. By force, if necessary.” Aveline glared at Anders and he sighed. “You know I didn’t mean that the way it sounded. You’re strong, alright. She’s an emotional wreck right now. If anything happens to that baby, she’ll never forgive herself.”

She huffed loudly. “You know I don’t exactly respect what the three of you are doing. But...” she paused a moment. “I do respect, Hawke. You can count on me, Anders. Find that elf, and bring him back. For Hawke’s sake.”

At that moment, Hawke came down the stairs with a heavy cloak and a parcel. “I packed some extra health potions, and snacks.” Anders smiled at that and gave her a kiss on the cheek. Even in a crisis, she was always thoughtful. 

Aveline and Hawke accompanied Anders on the way to the stable. She brought a few of her guards along, as it was dark out and took them a few hours to reach the outskirts. Hawke paid the stable keeper the cost to buy the horse, as they were not sure when Anders would return. She also gave Anders a coin purse full of gold, so he could buy any necessities he needed, should he run out. Before he mounted the mare, he grabbed Hawke into his arms, and held her tightly. He was afraid that he would never see her again. He kept his face masked for not wanting Hawke to doubt him, but knowing that Fenris was not able to take down the slavers himself left a queasy feeling in the pit of his stomach. He had no idea what he was up against.

“Take care, love. I’ll return to you soon.”

“Please do. I couldn’t bare the thought of losing both of you. I love you, Anders.”

“And I love you.” he said, kissing her lips sweetly. Anders mounted the horse, and stared longingly at Hawke once more, before riding off in the distance.

 

The map implied that the slavers were making a stop in Cumberland before taking a ship to Tevinter. That’s what he hoped anyway. Anders had been riding for a few hours now, feeling exhausted. Day would break soon, and he hadn’t yet slept. He lead the horse over to a tree by a stream, and tied her to the trunk. The horse drank from the water that trickled along, as Anders slouched against the tree, completely drained. How did he even get himself into this mess? Months ago, he would have been the last person risking his own hide to save the elf. But then he welcomed Fenris into his home. For Hawke.

His mind started racing. Maybe this was his chance. Fenris was gone now. He could return home in a few days time. Tell Hawke he was too late. In a few months, their child would arrive and the elf would be forgotten. It’s what he wanted, wasn’t it?

No. Hawke would be devastated. To the Void, she’d probably run out to try and find Fenris herself. He couldn’t do that to her, as much as he may have wanted to keep her and their child to himself. But, it was more than just Hawke. Anders had grown to respect Fenris in his own way. They would never see eye to eye when it came to mages, that was certain, but he had given him the gift of a child, something Anders had long since abandoned the idea of. And Fenris loved Hawke, he made her happy. Seeing Hawke happy made Anders happy. It was an ongoing cycle. One that he had grown accustomed to, and even enjoyed. Yes, he would find Fenris. He had to. He only hoped he wouldn’t be too late. Anders then closed his eyes, knowing that being sleep deprived would serve neither of them when he caught up to the slavers. He needed his strength. 

 

Fenris sat in the cage, running his fingers over the red cloth that was tied around his wrist. It had been two weeks now. Or was it three? He was beginning to lose count. The only thought that kept him sane was Hawke, and their child growing inside of her. He kept hoping that someone would come for him, someone would find him. But how could they, when they had no idea where he was? Even if they had an idea of where he was going, Hawke was pregnant. He couldn’t bear the thought of her risking their child to save him. 

He was beginning to give up hope. In two days, they were bound for Tevinter. If he made it on that ship, he would never return. Whichever magister bought him would be just as cruel as Danarius, no doubt. Once he was on their territory, there would be nothing Fenris could do to defend himself. Would they beat him within inches of his life weekly? Would they force him to lay with them? He cowered at the thought. He had been a free man for so long, he never thought he would become a slave again. Every night he dreamt of Hawke. He would wake in the morning, expecting to feel her soft skin against his, but would awake to a sore back, realising he was still caged like an animal, the feral wolf he was named after.

“Hey boys, look who’s up again!” the leader - a man who went by Dagg - said. There was a hint of menace to his voice. He threw a rock hard piece of crusty bread through the cage, smacking Fenris right on the head. 

“Eat up, slave. Who knows when your next meal will be.”

Without a reaction, Fenris grabbed the bread and bit into it. He accepted his fate, there was no point in fighting the inevitable anymore. Maybe if he cooperated now, they wouldn’t torment him as much on the ship. He could only hope.

As he was finishing his ‘meal’, there was a rustling of leaves and the sound of horses hooves on the ground. The slavers all stood up, weapons drawn, but Fenris didn’t even look up. Not until he heard a familiar voice.

“Excuse me? I couldn’t help but hear from the locals that you gentleman were passing through with the lyrium slave. I am a magister from Tevinter. I can save you the time and gold of travelling all the way to the Imperium.” 

Fenris’ heart stopped, and he looked up to see Anders, clear as day. The mage hopped off of a brown horse. His hair was dishevelled and he was wearing a black cloak. The elf suddenly saw the light at the end of the tunnel. Someone had come for him, and that someone was Anders.

“Magister, huh? You sure don’t look like no magister to me.” One of the men grunted.

“Yeah, if you’re really a Magister where’s your fancy clothes? And what the blight are you doing in Cumberland?”

“Well,” Anders said, striding confidently towards them. “I have a dear aunt who lives here. She just buried her husband, and I came down for emotional support. Word spread throughout the streets that you fine men were close by, so I had to see for myself.”

“What exactly are you willing to pay?” Dagg asked, eyeing him down. “I imagine that if we go to Tevinter, a great deal of bidding will happen. He won’t come at no low price.”

Finally, Anders shot Fenris a glance, one that was completely informal so that the slavers would not read into it too much, but it was enough for Fenris to know to brace himself. An attack was sure to come at any moment. He stood in his cage, preparing himself. 

“That’s what I’ve come here to discuss.” Fenris watched Anders closely, and he saw the mage’s eyes land on his greatsword, that was laying close to the fire. He smirked, and turned to Dagg.

“How much do you want for him?”

“I ain’t going any lower than fifty gold. Take it or leave it.”

“Hmm, an interesting offer. I think I can top you.”

“Is that so? With what?”

“With......this!” Anders yelled, shooting a cone of cold across them with his staff.

“We’re under attack!” One yelled. Anders cast his fire magic on the lock of the cage, melting it right off. Fenris broke out within seconds, as Anders grabbed his sword.

“Fenris, catch!” He yelled, tossing the elf his sword. Fenris grabbed it, and lunged forward, gutting one of the slavers. He smiled as he did so, the man’s innards splashing over him. He was stiff from lack of nutrition and movement the past few weeks, but he was still strong enough to inflict some real damage. Anders cast a fireball spell, the flames surrounding the slavers. One slaver rolled out of the way in an attempt to avoid one, but in the process collided into an oncoming flame. He immediately went up screaming in flames. He ran about fifteen feet away, before he succoumed to the pain, and fell over dead. 

Another slaver shot an arrow at Anders, and as he tried to jump away from it, it grazed past his arm. He hissed in pain, and Fenris ran behind the offender, decapitating him when he wasn’t looking. That’s when he saw Dagg trying to flee the scene. 

Fenris ran at him at full force, grabbing a hold of him, and slamming his body against a large tree. The man looked up at Fenris with pleading eyes.

“P...please..”

“I will greatly enjoy this,” Fenris said through clenched teeth. His markings flared, as he plunged his gauntlet into his chest. Dagg gasped, eyes going wide, as he watched Fenris withdraw his arm, heart in hand. He crushed the heart with his fist, as Dagg’s eyes rolled back, falling to the ground beneath him.

Anders came up behind Fenris as the elf turned around. The mage was covered in dirt, sweat, and blood.

“You....look as if you’ve been through the Void.” The elf finally said after a few moments.

“You should take a look at yourself.” Anders said, as he handed him a health potion. Fenris drank its contents in one gulp. He felt the familiar warmth spreading throughout his veins, and slowly began to regain some of his strength.

“How did you know where to find me?”

“The guards found a map on one of the bodies. Hawke wanted to come herself, but I wouldn’t allow it. I hope she has kept true to her word.”

“As do I.”

Anders mounted his mare. Fenris looked up as the mage shot him an amused look.

“You’re going to have to get on behind me.” 

Fenris scowled, and shook his head. “I would much rather walk.”

“You’ll hold us back, and Hawke’s already been waiting three weeks. She’s probably worried half to death.”

At that, Fenris swallowed his pride, allowing himself to grab Anders’ hand that he offered him, and swung his leg over the horse. He felt more than a little embarrassed, not knowing where to place his hands. Anders laughed.

“Hold onto my coat. I won’t bite.”

Fenris awkwardly placed his hands around the mage’s coat, grabbing on to it with his gauntlets.

“There, that’s not so bad, is it?” He said, as he clicked his teeth, signalling the horse to move onwards.

“Speak for yourself.” Fenris said low in his throat. Anders said nothing, as they rode in silence for a few minutes. Fenris exhaled deeply, thinking of what almost became of him. 

“You have impeccable timing.”

“I do, don’t I?”

“You’re not making this easy, mage.” Fenris took a moment, and when he spoke again, his voice was gentle, and sincere.

“Thank you, Anders.”

As they headed back in the direction of Kirkwall, Fenris prayed to the Maker that Hawke had stayed put. He would never forgive himself if her or the baby came to harm. Hold on, Hawke, he thought to himself. I’ll be there soon.


	11. In my arms

It had been six agonising weeks and Hawke had barely slept or ate in that time. Her eyes were bloodshot, her skin pale, and she could do nothing but pace back and forth. There was not a single moment of the day she was left alone. Aveline and Donnic had practically moved in, and during the days when they were working, either Varric or Isabela kept her company. She thought of fleeing at least ten times a day. It was unlike her to sit back and wait, but she had made a promise to Anders, and everyday she hated herself for it. She knew the trip would take at least a few weeks for certain, but it was driving her out of her mind not knowing if the men she loved were okay or not. 

Nights were the worst. At least during the day her friends were around to keep her company. But once nightfall came and Aveline retired for the night, Hawke was left alone in her cold empty bed. It seemed much too big for one person, now that she had shared it with two others. Despite her emotional condition, her hormones were not letting up. She would wake up in the middle of the night terribly aroused. She would try to push it out of her mind, but when it proved too much for her to bear, she would allow her hand to trail down her body and touch her most sacred place, thinking about Anders and Fenris. She could practically smell the musky scent of Anders’ herbs, or the tingle of her magic reacting to Fenris’ lyrium touch. But then the tears would come, and she would stop altogether or cry herself to completion. 

This particular evening, she had an awful feeling nagging her mind. It’s been too long. They should be back by now. She sat across the room from Aveline and Donnic, her friends giving her a worrisome look. 

“Will you please stop looking at me that way?” She snapped. Aveline’s expression softened.

“I’m just worried about you, Hawke. You’ve barely been eating.”

“How in the void am I supposed to eat when they’re out there somewhere? It’s all I can think about.” She said, standing as she began her nightly ritual of pacing the room back and forth. 

“Excuse me, I’ll be only a moment.” Aveline said, as she exited the room. Donnic stood and came by her side.

“I know this may not mean much, but Fenris is a friend of mine. He’s a tough one, you know that. I’m sure everything will turn out fine.”

“And what if they don’t? I’m sick and tired of everyone saying that! What if neither of them return and I’m forced to raise this baby alone?”

“Then you will find a way to survive it.” Aveline said, as she strolled back into the room. “Orana is drawing you a bath now. You’ve had a long day. You should try and relax.”

Hawke sighed out in defeat. She knew Aveline wouldn’t leave her alone until she listened. “Fine. I’ll be upstairs should you need me.”

Hawke made her way to her bed chambers a few minutes later, just as Orana had finished filling the tub.

“I hope the water is to your liking, Mistress.” She said, with a polite bow of her head.

“Thank you, Orana. Now leave me, if you would please.”

The door closed behind the young elf. Hawke stepped in front of the large basin, feeling the steam of the water hit her face. Just as she began to pull on her shirt, she felt a tiny kick in her stomach. She stopped dead in her tracks, as her heart sped up. Another flutter came from her ever-growing stomach. She placed a hand on her belly, and it was as if her babe reacted to her, because another kick came. Tears fell from her eyes. This isn’t right. This baby needs more than just a mother. I have to find them. 

Panic surged through her system. She had to get out of there somehow without Aveline detecting her. She felt as if she were a teenage girl, trying to sneak around behind her parents backs. She understood the woman’s good intentions but this was her decision to make, no one else’s. The window, Hawke thought to herself. She could scale her way down the trellis just beside her balcony. She was positive it would hold her weight. She went to her dresser and pulled out a pack, and gathered whatever necessities in her bedroom she could find. She could stop at a shop come morning. 

Hawke took a deep breath trying to calm her nerves. She opened up her balcony window to step out on the balcony. There was a heavy downpour of rain. She grabbed a hold of the trellis, and was about to swing one leg around as the rain soaked her hair when she heard that voice.

“Really, Hawke? Climbing down a balcony in your state?”

Hawke almost growled, and turned around. “Spying on me, Aveline?”

“Let’s get you back inside. You’ll get sick.”

“No.” She said, her voice firm.

“Hawke, you don’t want to do this.”

“Yes, I do. This is my decision, Aveline. You can’t control me.”

“And what of your child, Hawke? You can’t run off on an impulse.”

“An impulse? Is that what you call this?!” She screamed in her face, stomping towards Aveline. The red haired woman backed away to the point they were both standing back in the bedroom. “This isn’t like making some stupid mistake because I’ve had too much to drink. That’s impulse. This is Anders and Fenris’ lives.”

“And you are also risking the life of their child. You have no clue where they are. By running off on your own, you are only putting that baby at risk.”

“I know you don’t understand, but I can’t sit by and wait anymore, Aveline. Please. You need to let me do this.” She said, tears falling to join the rain that was bouncing off of her damp hair onto her cheeks. Aveline sighed.

“I’ll do more than just let you. I’ll help you.”

“You...you’ll what?”

“Tomorrow morning after the storm has passed, I’ll inform my guard that I am going away for two weeks time. I’m coming with you, Hawke.” 

Hawke began to laugh, more tears falling down her face. “Thank you Aveline. You have no idea what this means to me.”

“Yes, well.” She spoke, a small smile on her face. “I figure I owe you one. Now, how about we get you into something warm before you fall ill, hmm?”

There was a quiet rapp at the door, and when the two women turned, Donnic was standing there.

“I’m sorry to interrupt ladies, but you may want to go down to the foyer, Hawke.”

Hawke couldn’t help but notice the glimmer Donnic had in his eyes. Her heart stopped in her chest, and she bolted down the stairs. She almost tripped over her own feet when she saw standing before her soaking wet white and blonde hair. They were back. She let out a loud cry as she flung herself in both their arms. More tears fell down her face as she began to sob and heave. They stroked her hair, whispering soft apologies in her ears. None of them even noticed Aveline and Donnic taking their leave. 

“I...I thought..” she bawled and Anders wiped the tears from her eyes.

“Hush, love. It’s alright now.”

She kissed him hungrily for a few moments before she turned and threw her arms around Fenris neck, pressing her mouth to his. She took his face in between her hands and looked him deeply in the eyes.

“Please tell me you’re alright.”

“I assure you I am well now that I know you’re safe.”

“You were worried about me?” She asked in disbelief.

“Of course I was.”

“We both were.” Anders answered. She saw her blonde lover staring at her abdomen in wonder. “My how you’ve grown in just a few weeks.”

She smiled, and suddenly at that moment, the baby began to kick again. She smiled wide, more tears falling down her face.

“Hawke, what is it?” Fenris asked, his voice laced with worry.

“Feel.” She said as she grabbed a hand from each man, and slid them under her wet tunic. She jumped a bit, as both of their hands were freezing from the rain. It took a moment’s time, but then her babe was active again, moving about like mad. Anders’ face was filled with awe as he sank to his knees and pressed his face to her tummy. Fenris took the opportunity to claim her mouth, kissing her with a fire that she had never felt before. She yearned for him, for both of them.

“You’re both freezing. Orana just drew me a bath. I suggest you two follow me before it gets cold.”

She stood before the large basin in her room. Anders swept his hand in the water that had chilled since it had been drawn. With a wave of his hand, the temperature rose again.

“One of the many upsides of magic.”

“You mean one of the few.” Fenris said sternly.

“Please, no fighting tonight.” Hawke interjected.

“I suggest you find a way to distract us then, love. How about losing those clothes?”

She smiled at Anders, and was about to lift up her shirt when she froze. In the time that they had been gone, her pregnancy had claimed her body. Her abdomen was now covered in long purple lines, as her skin stretched and accommodated for her babe. She suddenly felt insecure. Before they had left, her skin had been flawless, and now it was scarred. If they had been there for the gradual change, saw it each and every day, maybe it wouldn’t have been so bad. But now, maybe they would think it was ugly and flawed. She bit her lip.

“What is it?” Anders asked, seeing her hesitation.

“It’s just that...well, I’ve changed. My body is different. I have these...these ugly scars.”

“You mean stretch marks?” Anders asked, and she nodded. “Sweetheart, you knew your body would change. It’s perfectly normal.”

“I...I know that. I just feel embarrassed is all.”

Fenris placed a finger under her chin so she turned to face him. “What do you think of my markings Hawke? Do you think that they are ugly?”

“Maker no! They’re beautiful.”

“Then you have no reason to feel ashamed.” He said warmly as he grabbed the bottom of her shirt and pulled it over her head. He knelt down before her, and delicately rubbed her stomach over where her body had been marked. “Just as I suspected. These too, are beautiful.” He said kissing each one tenderly with love. Hawke felt her cheeks flush as he watched him adore her new body. Anders stood behind her, massaging her tender breasts.

“These have grown as well.” He whispered in her ear, his voice needy. He pressed into her from behind, and she could feel his arousal. She stepped out of her remaining clothes, and sunk into the warm tub. She shot both of them a playful smile.

“Theres room in here for two more.” She did not have to repeat herself. Anders and Fenris rid themselves of their clothing in mere seconds. Anders sat behind Hawke, Fenris in front. They both hummed delightfully as they sank into the warm water.

“Maker, you have no idea how good it feels to have a proper bath again.” Anders said contentedly.

“Well, I wasn’t going to say anything, but you both certainly smelled like you could use it.” Hawke chuckled. 

“You try being out in the wilderness for weeks at a time, Hawke. I assure you that you would not smell pleasant either.”

“Well, let me help you wash, then.” She grabbed some cleansing lotion and rubbed it between her palms, warming it up. She spread the clear liquid across Fenris’ shoulders and chest, and worked it in like a massage. She felt Anders’ hands on her back, doing the same to her that she did to Fenris. She let out a soft sigh.

“Oh that does feel nice. I have been rather sore.” Anders chuckled from behind her and planted a chaste kiss behind her ear.

“Good.”

Fenris leaned forward and kissed her tenderly, his hand reaching out to stroke her stomach again. Hawke couldn’t help but beam down at him. They had both been lavishing her belly with affection. It felt wonderful to have them back in her arms, but it amazed her at how much they adored her blossoming bump. She felt all her insecurities wash away in the tub.

“I think it’s my turn.” Anders whispered in her ear. Hawke turned so that she was now facing Anders, and Fenris was at her back. Anders pressed his lips to hers in a needy fashion, as she rubbed her hands over his broad chest. When she pulled away his eyes were narrowed and smiling. She gathered some of the lotion in her hands, and began to rub him down just as she had done a minute ago with Fenris.

“You’re right. This does feel nice.” He said. Fenris was kissing her shoulders softly, as his hands ran down her spine. Lower and lower they went, until they delved in between her legs, cupping her sex. She let out a pleasant gasp, and when she looked up at Anders, he had mischief in his eyes.

“I bet you missed this more than anything.” He said, his voice hinting that he too was becoming aroused.

“Definitely at the top of the list.” She responded quietly, as Fenris had found her clit and was tapping away at it. Anders grabbed her hand, submerging it into the water until she found his cock, hard and ready.

“Feel how much I’ve missed you.”

“Looks like you’ve missed me a lot.” She bit on her lip, as she pumped her hand up and down his shaft. Anders groaned, and Hawke cried out, feeling a single digit press into her entrance. Fenris began to stroke her inner walls, finding that delicious spot that made her mewl with pleasure. A second finger joined the first, as he spread them, opening her up.

“Just a preview of what is to come.” He said, his voice low and gravelly. 

“Don’t keep me waiting, Fenris. For Maker’s sakes, I haven’t had either of you in over a month.” She whined. Both of the men laughed, as she felt Fenris shift behind her. “On your knees.” He demanded, which she readily complied. She still stroked Anders as she felt the tip of Fenris’ cock seek her entrance. With a quick push, he was inside.

“Oh, of all that is holy!” she gasped, and Fenris began to pound into her with earnest. She felt her body trying to accommodate his length, as it had proven to been too long since the last time she was taken.

“I think you’ve gotten tighter.” He growled into her ear, as the sounds of his body slapped against her ass and the water.

As Fenris surged into her while she stroked Anders’ cock, the mage sought out her nub. Once it was found, he began to stroke her gently, causing her to whimper and shake.

“Oh, I’m going to cum!” she all but yelled. Hawke’s eyes shut, as her orgasm gripped her entire body. She could practically see stars behind closed eyes as her tight walls convulsed around Fenris. Anders kissed her as her body came down from its high.

“Hurry up will you?” he pestered the elf. “I am dying over here.”

“You can wait until I am sated, mage.”

“Is that how I’m treated after rescuing you?”

“I see this will be held over my head for years to come.” Fenris growled, as he continued to thrust into Hawke hard.

Their arguing was one of the few things she did not miss. “Oh will you to shut it. If one of you gets out of the tub I will please whoever with my mouth while the other takes me.”

This apparently was enough for Fenris to withdraw from Hawke. He climbed out of the tub, almost slipping on the ground as he did so. Hawke laughed.

“Guess that sweetened the deal.” She moved so she was partly leaning over the tub, as much as her belly would allow for it anyways. Fenris stepped towards her, pushing his erection into her mouth. She could taste herself on him, moaning as she took him in deeper. Anders pushed his member into her warm entrance, his hands firm on her hips. He began to buck into her wildly, each thrust met with one of Fenris’. She groaned, feeling the best kind of pleasure as one man fucked her core as the other fucked her mouth. It didn’t take long for Fenris to finish. She hummed onto him, her tongue swirling over his sensitive tip. He came with a roar, spurting jets of semen onto her tongue. Hawke swallowed it down, enjoying the flavour that she had so missed. 

Fenris slumped to his knees, and sank a hand into the cooling water to find her clit once again. He masturbated her until she was crying out to the Maker once more. She came loudly, which brought Anders to his end. The mage groaned her name as he filled her with his seed.

Once they had calmed down from the aftershocks of their intense lovemaking, the three of them dried off and climbed into the large bed. None of them bothered with clothes.

“I daresay this feels even more exquisite than the warm water.” Fenris said, as he snaked an arm around Hawke, closing his eyes. 

“Would be a safe guess.” Anders answered, holding her hand as he lay to her front.

“Nothing in this world feels better than having you two in my arms.” Hawke replied, a huge smile spread across her face. For the first time in weeks, she slept soundly.


	12. Family

Fenris laid awake at an unholy hour, as he had a great deal of trouble staying asleep that night. He gazed at Hawke’s face, as she dreamt soundly. He had been too caught up in his longing and worry for her while he was away to consider what would happen when and if he returned. If one group of slavers came looking for him, more were bound to come eventually. It was no secret amongst Kirkwall’s inhabitants that Fenris was living with their Champion. He wasn’t sure if more than just Hawke’s close friends knew of their special kind of relationship, but he wouldn’t be surprised. Not with Isabela’s incessant yapping at the Hanged Man, whining about how it was somehow unfair to her. 

The idea of leaving once again pulled at Fenris’ heart, but how could he be so selfish when it came to Hawke? Was his being happy really worth the life of the woman he loved and his unborn child? Certainly not. He could never live with himself if harm should come to them. He quietly climbed out of bed, so as to not wake the two mages who slept in it, put on his clothing, and headed for the room that held his belongings.

The few boxes he used to bring his things in were still in a corner of the room. Fenris went over to a dresser, and began to empty it of it’s contents in a fast manner.

“Just what are you doing?” Fenris quickly turned and saw Hawke, in a silken robe, standing at the doorway. A mix of worry and anger spread over her features. Clearly he did not do a very effective job in remaining unheard. He ran a hand through his white hair, his glance cast at the floor.

“Hawke,” he exhaled. She rushed over to him and grabbed him by the shoulders.

“You’re filling a box with your clothes. Fenris! Why are you packing your things?” She was practically yelling already, and he wouldn’t be surprised if she had woken everyone in the estate.

“You are not safe with me here. Neither of you are.” He answered, referring to the child within her womb.

“Oh, for fuck’s sakes!” He finally looked into her eyes, and her face was bright red. He had never seen Hawke this angry before, and if he were honest with himself, Fenris was a little frightened. “I’m not some innocent maiden who doesn’t know how to defend herself. Will you stop acting like I’m a delicate flower already?”

“You are with child, Hawke. My child. I will not allow myself to be the reason that either of you come into harm.”

“There are bad people out there, Fenris. A whole whack load of them living just outside of these walls. Why, I could walk out on the street tomorrow and find myself mugged at knifepoint. You don’t know what the future holds, but I’ll be damned if I’m going to sit by and watch you walk out that door for the third time. Do you have any idea what kind of personal Void I’ve been through since you were taken from me?! Do you have any idea..of..the...” Hawke went from yelling to bawling her eyes out in mere seconds. His heart fell into the pit of his stomach. Fenris was never comfortable with displays of strong emotions, but this was Hawke. He reached out to pull her into his embrace, but she pushed him away. So hard in fact that he almost lost his balance and fell over. He looked at her with surprise written all over his face.

“Don’t you start. Do not comfort me if you’re only going to leave!”

“What would you have of me? I only wish to see you safe.”

“Please don’t leave. Fenris, I couldn’t..” She was sobbing between words. “...bear it if you..le..left again.” 

That was all it took for him to fold. Fenris wiped her tears with the pads of his thumbs, and kissed her forehead tenderly before holding her close to him.

“I’m sorry. I will not do any such thing. I am here.” Hawke buried her face into his chest, as he stroked her hair and whispered sweet words into her ear. He felt her body relaxing as her breathing slowed. “Let’s get you back to bed.”

“Promise you’ll stay?” She asked, peering up at him through teary eyes.

“You have my word.”

He scooped Hawke into his arms and carried her back into the other bedroom. Anders was sitting up, looking concerned.

“Anything I should be worried about?” He asked. Fenris shook his head as he laid Hawke on her back and climbed in next to her.

“It has been dealt with.” he answered. 

“Are you alright?” Anders asked Hawke, ignoring Fenris.

“Yes, I’m fine. Let’s just get back to sleep, shall we?” And they did, with no further objections.  
***************************

Fenris awoke hours later to an empty bed. As he sat up, he could hear a familiar voice carry throughout the estate. It unmistakably belonged to Carver. He wasn’t aware that the templar was expected to visit. As Fenris walked down the stairs, he slowed his movements and listened to the nature of the conversation for a few minutes, before making his presence known.

“I knew you were pregnant. Everyone in Kirkwall does! But to hear from that dwarf about whose child you’re really pregnant with? You’re...you’re...”

“I’m what, Carver?” Hawke challenged.

“You’re acting like some floosie, that’s what! Do you have any idea how disturbing this is?”

“I will not have you in my house talking to her that way!” Anders yelled at the younger Hawke.

“Your house? This estate belonged to my grandparents you daft son of a - “

“Carver!” Hawke yelled back. 

“If you really do care for my sister like you confess, how could you allow this?”

It was just then that Fenris stepped into the kitchen, and Carver seemed to stutter on his words as he did.

“Fenris...oh...I uh, didn’t know you were standing there.”

“I do live here now.”

“Yes,” he laughed nervously, rubbing the back of his neck with one hand. “I heard.”

“I am guessing you disapprove of this from your choice of words.”

“No...no...that’s not what I meant.” 

Anders smirked and Hawke rolled her eyes. It was no secret to anyone, not even Fenris, that Carver looked up to him. Before he became a templar he was always trying to get on the elf’s good side.

“Then what exactly is the problem?”

“It’s just not something a brother wants to hear about his sister. It’s...well...scandalous.”

Fenris never considered how Hawke’s remaining family would react upon hearing the news. He didn’t have a family of his own, aside from that treacherous sister who tried to betray him. He wouldn’t know how he himself would react if the roles were reversed. He imagine he would feel a little upset, like Carver was now. 

“You should know that I care for your sister, a great deal. This was not an easy arrangement to make, by any means. You have my word Carver, that I have no ill intentions. I only wish to remain by her side, and raise this child. Is this acceptable to you?”

Anders began to laugh. “Oh, come on now. You don’t need his permission!”

“Well that...I...guess that’s alright. Yes..I’m...fine with it.”

“So there will be no further yelling at Hawke? She is carrying your nephew after all.” Fenris said, a hint of a smile playing across his lips. His tactic clearly worked because Carver’s face softened.

“That’s right. I guess I’m going to be an uncle soon. When is the baby due?” he asked Hawke.

“In about three and a half months.” she said, rubbing a hand across her belly.

“That soon? Wow.” he was smiling now, as was Hawke. 

Fenris spent the rest of the afternoon at Hawke’s side. Anders headed out for the clinic, as he would no doubt have much work to catch up on after being gone for so long. Carver stayed a little longer, and hounded Hawke with dozens of questions about the child. Fenris was relieved when he finally parted ways, but he noticed the look of disappointment on Hawke’s face.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“I never get to see my brother anymore. I just..miss him is all.”

“Are you certain you’re well?” he teased, and she playfully smacked him in the arm.

“I know, I know. Carver is a royal pain in the arse, but he’s the only real family I have left.”

“That is not true.” Fenris said, pulling her close. “You have me. And soon this babe will arrive. You are my family, Hawke, and my entire world. Do not ever doubt for a second that I don’t cherish every moment spent by your side.”

She smiled from ear to ear, and attacked his mouth with hers. His intention was only to comfort her, but it this was the thanks he got, well, that was only a bonus. Her tongue pushed into his mouth desperately, as her hands ran through his hair.

“Make love to me, Fenris. Now.”

“Here?” he asked, looking around the kitchen.

“Yes. Here.” She smiled, and hoisted herself up on the table, dropping her skirt onto the ground.

“Are you certain? What if one of your servants walks in on us?”

“They’re out for the afternoon, and so what?” She smiled devilishly. “It will only add to the thrill.”

Fenris felt his leggings become painfully tight, completely aroused by her naughty suggestions. He dropped to his knees in front of her, pulling her smallclothes off of her legs.

“Oh my.” she giggled, but Fenris soon hushed her as his tongue sought out her clit. She gasped, pushing his head further into her, as he lapped at her center. She tasted sweet and tangy, as his tongue devoured her essence. Fenris pressed two fingers into her, pushing them in and out, as his other hand worked at his laces, frantic to free his erection. As soon as he pulled himself out, he began to jerk himself, groaning into her sweet mound.

“Oh Fenris, don’t stop,” she urged. His tongue darted across her nub, as his fingers worked faster, curing upward towards her belly, hitting that delicious spot inside of her. She came undone around his fingers, screaming his name. He withdrew his fingers from her heat, and pressed them to her lips. She took them into her mouth, swirling her tongue over them hungrily. Fenris couldn’t take it anymore. He positioned himself between her legs and thrust into her. They both moaned loudly, feeling her tight, wet heat swallow him whole.

“Fuck.” he hissed through his teeth.

“Fuck me.” she said playfully, a twinkle in her eyes. Fenris smiled, before his lips crashed with hers as he began to buck into her with great fervor. He muffled a moan into her neck, as she wrapped her legs tight around his waist, forcing him to surge deeper into her core.

“Hawke.” he chanted her name.

“You’re getting close, aren’t you?”

“Yes.” he sighed deeply.

“Fill me up, Fenris. Oh Maker, give it to me.”

And he did. Her words were his undoing as he felt his orgasm hit him instantly. Her name left his lips, followed by a string of curses as the hot pleasure consumed him. His member slipped out of her, and he opened his eyes to see Hawke smiling up at him.

“So, we can mark kitchen sex off of my to-do list.”

“There is a list?” he asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Oh yes. You were gone for so very long. We have lot’s of hot, gratifying sex to catch up on. That and...well, the baby will be here soon. I’m not sure how often we’ll get a chance to do it once the little one arrives.”

“Then we better take every opportunity we have.”

“My thoughts exactly.” Hawke said, as she pulled him in for another passionate kiss.


	13. A wonderful thing

“It’s...it’s lovely Aveline.” Hawke said, as she unwrapped the gift in her hands. She held up what had to be the ugliest outfit Anders had ever seen. It looked much like a burlap sack. Hawke was a much better actor than he was, and he snickered.

“Something wrong with my gift, Anders?”

“No no...nothing at all.” he chuckled.

“The gift is just fine.” Hawke said, shooting him a dirty look.

Aveline, Merrill, and Isabela had come, showering Hawke with gifts for her child. She was due any day now, and by Anders’ judgement, it wouldn’t be long. The baby had dropped and was already in position. Anders decided to stay, as he might have some rare alone time with Hawke when the women left. Fenris was out doing a job with Varric and Sebastian, and there was no way the mage would let the possible opportunity go to waste. In the past few months, he began to feel left out. It was no one’s fault but his own, he knew that much. He’d been diving deeper into the mage underground as the outlook for Kirkwall’s mages became more and more grim. Hawke was the light of his life, and he already loved this baby more than he knew he could possibly love anything. Justice would not relent, however. So he stayed late at his clinic, hunched over his desk, working at his manifesto. Some nights he didn’t even have the energy to return home. He was beginning to feel negligent, and it tugged at his conscience. He once caught Fenris rubbing Hawke’s belly, and the damned elf said “This is how I know you’re mine.” Anders seethed in anger, but said nothing. The area he did put forth all of his efforts, however, was the bedroom. He felt it was a constant competition, trying to one up Fenris. Before the elf came into the equation, their lovemaking had often been tender and slow, passionate and gentle. Now it was as if he had become aggressive to drive a point home. It was a feeling Anders didn’t like, he hated feeling possessive.

 

He sat in his chair across from the women, observing Hawke. Her belly was round with his child but the rest of her was unchanged.. She was the same, albeit a more moody version. He didn’t love her any less. Hawke pulled out a book from a parcel Merrill gave to her, her eyes set on the gift.

“It’s a book of spells for young mages.” the elf explained.

“Merrill, we don’t know that the baby will be a mage.” Hawke said.

“Oh, I know that. It’s just with your genetics, as well of Anders’...”

“Sweet thing, we’ve been over this. It’s not really Anders’ child.” The pirate said, sweeping a strand of hair off of Merrill’s face.

“Only biologically.” Anders snapped.

“Let’s change the subject, shall we?” Aveline interjected.

“Here, open mine.” Isabela said, plopping a bag into Hawke’s lap. Hawke pulled out the gift, her eyes wide and cheeks blushing. She was holding a see through night shift in her hands, that looked like something the workers at the Blooming Rose would wear.

“It’s for after the baby comes. Seeing as you have two gorgeous men in your home, I figured it would not go to waste with you.” Isabela said with a chuckle to her voice.

Anders grinned as he saw the negligee in Hawke’s hands. Maker, she would look stunning in that, he thought to himself as he pictured the way it would cling to her body. When he saw the look on her face, however, he became worried. Her eyes were downcast, even as she smiled and thanked Isabela. He knew Hawke like the back of his hand, and knew when she was putting on a charade for everyone else.

Soon after, her friends left, leaving the two of them alone at last. Hawke was tidying up when Anders approached her. He ran his hand down her face, and her eyes met his.

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

“Nothing’s wrong. Why would you think that?”

“Hawke,” he said firmly, but not unkind. “You think I can’t see through you? Something’s bothering you. What is it?”

She let out an exasperated sigh, and lowered herself to the couch. “Isabela’s gift.”

“What about it?” He sat beside her and took her hand in his.

“I’ll never be able to wear something like that again.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Okay, I know this is going to sound incredibly self-centered, but there is no way I am going to feel confident after this. I mean, I’m going to be a mother. My stomach will be completely stretched out and marked up and I know it’s selfish of me to be worried about such trivial things but...how could you possibly be attracted to me? I’m going to look nothing like I did before, and this gift only reminds me of that.”

Anders kissed her forehead. “Is that what this is all about? You know I think you’re beautiful. The female body is a wonderful thing, don’t I know it.” He grinned, and began to rub her swollen belly. “If you think for a second that mother’s can’t be desirable too, you are mistaken, love.” 

Anders nudged his lips against hers. Her mouth opened instantly, inviting his tongue inside. He ran his hands down her sides, stroking and caressing her body gently. Hawke moaned into his mouth as Anders cupped her large breasts.

“You want to...right now?” she asked as she pulled away.

“Is there a problem with that? We are alone after all.”

“This is true,” she smiled at him. “You’re going to have to help me up the stairs though.”

“But of course.” Anders shot her a charming grin as he stood to his feet and stretched his arms out to Hawke. She took his hands, allowing him to hoist her to her feet. He assisted her up the stairs which proved to be more challenging for her each passing day. When they reached the bedroom, Hawke flopped herself down on the bed.

“How is it that a set of stairs is workout for me now?” She groaned, rubbing her hand over her stomach. “You hear that child? You will be the end of your mother before you’re even born!”

Anders chuckled as he came to her side. “I’m not sure I’d want to come out if I had such a comfortable home, myself.”

“Can’t you just...I don’t know...force it out?”

“Sorry, love. These things have to happen on their own.”

She flopped her head on the pillow, letting out a deep breath. Anders pulled one of her legs into his lap and started to massage her swollen feet.

“Oh...that’s good.” she groaned.

“Massage has been known to induce labor in some cases.” He said as he pressed his thumbs into the sole of her foot.

“Well then, massage away.”

Anders cast a small grease spell, adding moisture to his hands so he could better work at her sore muscles. His fingers kneaded up her calf, rubbing and soothing the aches she had been feeling over the last few months. Hawke groaned, similar to the sounds she often made during lovemaking. It was a joy to hear them. Anders took her other leg, repeating the process all over again. 

“That feels so nice.”

“I am glad to hear it.” he laughed, enjoying the tender moment they were sharing.

“Is there anything else you can do to speed things up?”

“There is perhaps, one more thing,” Anders replied, a sly grin coming to his face. “Sex has been known to induce labor, in many circumstances.”

Hawke let out a short laugh. “Is that an actual fact, or an ‘I’ll say anything to have you now’ fact?”

He climbed up beside her and took her into his arms. “An actual fact. Although, the second one sounds pretty close to how I feel right now.”

“Alright, alright. You’ve convinced me. Just help me out of these clothes, will you? I’m comfortable and it’s hard to sit up.”

Anders smiled, as he unlaced her robes. He kissed her collar bone as it became exposed, and ran his hands over her stomach. He could feel the little one responding to his touch, which made him grin even wider. Anders reached around her back, undoing her breast band and pulling it away. Her breasts were swollen, and he made extra care to be gentle when he caressed them. Hawke moaned softly, her cheeks now flushed. He ran his hands down the length of her body, peeling away her smallclothes when he reached them. Anders kissed her thighs, gently nipping and sucking at her tender flesh.

“Maker, Anders! Get on with it!” she complained.

“Patience, love.” he said, his voice low and needy. He placed two fingers at her opening, slowly pushing them inside. Hawke cried out as he curled them, stroking the sensitive spot within her that always granted him those delicious noises from Hawke. Anders kissed her outer lips, teasing her before he took her swollen nub into his mouth and sucked. She tasted tangy and sweet. He flicked his tongue over the bead as he sucked, causing her to buck her hips forward. His fingers continued to move within her, spreading and preparing her for him. It had been a month since Hawke had been taken, and even longer since it was Anders. She had been sore and moody and just generally not in the mood, but now she pulled his hair and screamed his name, as she came undone from his mouth and fingers. He continued to lap at her until her fingers pushed his head back, signalling that she had enough.

“How was that?” Anders asked, confident in himself.

“Do you even need to ask?” she laughed. “Now, are you going to make love to me, or what?”

“I thought you’d never ask.” he groaned. Anders divested himself of his clothing. He got into a kneeling position in between her legs, cautious not to place any pressure on her belly. He shifted his hips forward, entering her slowly. They both moaned at the connection, and Anders shut his eyes, reveling at the feeling of being engulfed in her heat once again. He moved in and out of her with ease as she was well lubricated from his earlier efforts. His hands grabbed onto her thighs as he surged in and out of her tight sheath.

“You look so good opened like this for me.”

“I love you, Anders.”

“I love you, too.”

Anders felt his heart swell, his emotions taking over in the moment. The intimacy between them was overwhelming. He felt so much love for her and their child. He gazed at her body, watching her breasts bounce up and down as he pumped into her.

“Let me see you touch yourself, love.”

She ran a hand down her body, teasingly slow, giving him a show. Her finger found her pearl, and she began to circle it with a practised ease.

“Oh Maker, keep doing that.” he moaned, feeling his end nearing. The sight of her pleasuring herself as he made love to her was almost too much. “Help me take you there.”

Her eyes snapped shut as her breathing grew more ragged. Anders knew she was close now, just as he was.

“Anders, I’m going to…” the rest of her sentence was cut off as she let out a loud wail of completion. Her muscles clamped around his member, squeezing and tightening around him. He thrust into her a few more times before releasing inside of her. Wave after wave of pleasure consumed him as he filled her with his seed. Slowly he slipped out, and lay across the foot of the bed idly staring up at the ceiling as he caught his breath.

“I keep forgetting how good you are at that.” Hawke said after a minute of silence.

Anders laughed and rolled onto his side to face her. “Which part?”

“All of it.” she said with a grin, meeting his eyes with hers. Anders sat up and began to dress himself. He helped Hawke get back into her robes. She stood from the bed as Anders wrapped his arms around her. 

“I’ll make us something to eat. You relax, love.”

“If you insist.” She said, kissing him once more. Anders turned around and began to exit the room when he heard a yelp coming from Hawke. He turned to see her bent forward staring at the ground. He noticed immediately that the front of her robes were wet and her face was red.

“I...I don’t know what happened...did I just...?”

He came close to her, examining her briefly, even as she tried to cover herself up.

“I do believe your water just broke.” he answered, half amused and half in disbelief.

“Oh, so long as I didn’t just wet myself.That would have been embarrassing.” She said with relief. Anders couldn’t help but laugh.

“Well, looks like there will be a baby soon.” Anders put a new set of sheets on the bed, and a handed Hawke a fresh set of robes to wear. He arranged the pillows on the bed so that she would be more comfortable. She laid back as he gathered a few things from various drawers that he brought over from the clinic in case this very scenario happened in their home. Hawke had a sense of calm on her face, which pleased Anders to see. He however was feeling a bit panicked now that the time had come. He had delivered dozens of babies before, but now that it was Hawke, the woman he loved, the dangers of the situation sobered him. Childbirth, however natural it was, did have its risks. It was not uncommon for a woman or child to die during the birthing process. He was a skilled healer, he knew that much, but it did not stop the fear that gripped his heart. He sat on the edge of the bed, leaning down to kiss Hawke.

“I love you. So much.”

“I know,” she said gently. “I love you too, Anders.” Not a moment later she hissed out in pain, experiencing the first of many contractions to come. The baby was well on it’s way, and Anders hoped he was prepared for whatever was to come.


	14. Thank you

Fenris wiped his brow as he finally made his way to the estate. The sun had long since set, and after trailing the Wounded Coast all day with Varric and Sebastian, the elf was completely drained. He shut the front door behind him, and took a few steps forward when he heard a scream that froze him dead in his tracks. Hawke. Unsheathing his sword, Fenris bolted all the way up the stairs into the bedroom where he heard her cries. He swung open the door loudly, seeing Anders’ hand clenched in Hawke’s as he whispered soothing words to her. She was in her nightgown, beads of sweat trickling down her temples. Anders shot a look towards Fenris, whose weapon was still drawn.

“Nothing to panic about. She’s been having contractions for several hours now and is a few centimeters dilated. It shouldn't be long now.” The realization of the mage’s words dawned on Fenris and he lowered his sword. “She was worried you wouldn't be here in time.”

“Fenris,” Hawke whimpered, her arm stretched towards him. Hearing her weakened voice snapped him out of his state of shock and he came to her side, sitting at the edge of the bed. He tossed his gauntlets aside, before he took her free hand in his, squeezing it tightly for support.

“I am here.” He said, as he brushed a damp strand of chestnut hair away from her forehead. “How are you faring?”

“Oh, just peachy. It feels like a small ogre is wrecking havoc on my insides.”

Fenris almost laughed at that, but the pained look in Hawke’s eyes stopped him. Her grip on his hand tightened and another whimper left her lips.

“Another contraction coming?” Anders asked, and she nodded her head right before letting out a sharp cry. She wailed out, her fingers bruising Fenris’ hand. His heart plunged into his gut, seeing his strong, brave Hawke in such a state.

“Do something, mage! She is in a great deal of pain.”

“You think I would allow her to suffer? There is nothing I can do, Fenris. All women go through this. It’s perfectly natural.”

“It certainly doesn’t feel that way,” Hawke groaned as she writhed on the bed.

“Shh...sweetheart,” Anders said but she glared at him.

“Don’t you go shushing me!”

The mage looked as if he were going to say something but closed his mouth and kissed her hand instead.

“Oh Maker, how much longer is this going to last?” Hawke groaned, completely exhausted. 

“With the way things are moving, I’d say it shouldn’t be much longer.” Anders reassured her.

But he was wrong. Four hours later, as the sun was beginning to rise in the sky, Hawke was still in labor. Drops of perspiration trickled down her temples and her hair was soaked and clung to her skin. Fenris took a cool wet cloth, and pressed it to her forehead as Anders examined her for what seemed like the tenth time. The mage’s mouth was set in a tight line, and Fenris felt panicked, seeing his fingers covered in blood. Hawke’s blood.

“What is it? Is she alright? What of the child?”

Anders looked at Hawke and squeezed her calves. “Alright Hawke, the baby is ready. I need you to start pushing.”

Hawke nodded and Fenris climbed behind her, as they had planned prior. His legs were on either side of her torso, his fingers intertwined with hers. He felt her grip tighten, and somehow Fenris knew she was afraid. He had grown to know every single bit of her, whether she spoke the words or not, they were not needed. Fenris placed his lips beside her ear and whispered “I am here.”

With that Hawke let out a deep breath, and began to push. Fenris assumed once she had started pushing, it would soon be over and done with, but that wasn’t the case. She was pushing for nearly an hour, when she began to scream even louder than she had been.

“Oh Maker, it hurts!” Her grip on Fenris became tighter, his knuckles white from the pressure. It was then as Anders was examining her that his gaze met Fenris’, and the elf could not miss the panicked expression set on his face. An icy grip squeezed at his heart.

“Hawke, we need to get the baby out now. I can feel that the chord is around it’s neck. I need you to push again. I’m going to help pull the baby out, love. Push, now.”

“Oh please…” she sobbed, trembling in Fenris’ arms. Fenris could barely breathe at the thought that their child was in danger, and there was nothing he could do to help. He knew he had to be strong, if for no one else, for Hawke. 

“You can do this,” Fenris murmured, and with a nod of her head, she began to push again. She yelled loudly, straining to push and bear through the pain, as Anders inserted a few fingers inside of her to assist in pulling the child out. Fenris’ chest was soaked with her perspiration, and he felt warm himself as his own anxiety was getting the best of him. There was blood, a lot more than he expected there to be, and although he was often covered in blood, it was Hawke’s blood. His heart thumped rapidly in his chest, and he began to feel overwhelmed with worry. 

“One more time.” Anders said, his voice calm and collected. Hawke did as he said, whimpering and groaning through the process. Moments later, a sharp cry rang out, and in Anders’ arms was a squirmy, tiny human. Half-elven human, to be exact. Anders laughed, his voice quivering with emotion.

“It’s a little girl, Hawke,” he spoke, his eyes watering with joy. “She made it.”

“Let me see her.” Hawke sounded exhausted, but the desire to hold her baby outweighed everything else.

“Just a moment, sweetheart. I need to examine her briefly.”

Anders cut the umbilical cord before taking the child over to a table, and looked her over. As he did this, Fenris climbed out from behind Hawke, and sat at her side, kissing her softly. “You are a mother now.” 

“And you’re a father.” she answered as she stroked his cheek. Anders came over, baby in arms, with a huge smile on his face.

“She’s a perfectly healthy little girl. See for yourself.” He put the tiny baby in Hawke’s arms, and Fenris felt her quiver with emotion beside him. He peered down at the child, his child, for the first time. She had dark hair like her mother, but definitely had many elven features; there would be no doubt who her father was. Her eyes were almond shaped, although they were hazy and it was unclear as to what color they really were at this point. Her little ears pointed ever so slightly at their tips, and she had a narrow nose. Her lips however, were round and full like her mothers. Hawke wept joyously beside him, and in that moment, Fenris was taken aback by the overwhelming love he felt instantly for this tiny baby he had never seen before. His child, his baby, his daughter. This little life was a part of him, and he knew from that very moment, he would do anything in his power to protect her. 

“Would you like to hold her?”

“I...I don’t know how.” Fenris said. She was so tiny and fragile.

“Here, it’s okay.” Hawke placed the baby in Fenris’ stiff arms. She felt as if she weighed nothing at all. He noticed that her eye shape and nose were almost identical to his own, and a smile spread across his face. His daughter was beautiful, half of him and the woman he loved. Suddenly, all the doubts he had a year prior, when he first agreed to his arrangement with Hawke and Anders, all the pain and heartache were worth it. He had a family now, even if it did involve the mage. “Thank you, Hawke.” he said quietly, the emotion weighing heavily in his voice.

“No, thank you Fenris.” Anders answered.

 

They named the baby Sadie Leandra, and she certainly was a spirited one. Fenris was positive all of Kirkwall knew of the child, for it seemed she cried endlessly for hours on end. Two weeks had gone by since the birth of their child, and the Hightown mansion was filled with gifts from their friends. On this particular day, Sadie was especially cranky. Anders was gone for the day, but Fenris stayed to assist Hawke with their child. She had tried feeding her, changing her, singing her ridiculous songs, but nothing soothed her raging temper. Her face was a deep shade of scarlet and her shrill cry rang throughout the bedroom. 

“What do you want from me?” Hawke sighed, rocking the baby in her arms. “You are not hungry, you are not wet, you have been burped. Do you wish to torment me? Is that it? Why are you crying?"

“Hawke, your child will not see reason.”

“She’s your child too! And it certainly shows with her temperament.” She said with a deep sigh. Fenris’ face was set in a scowl. He envied the way Anders was always able to soothe Sadie. He could just scoop her into his arms, and whisper in her ear and the child would stop any signs of fussing. Fenris still to this day was not able to pick Sadie up without having her handed to him. He was terrified of hurting her, and he had no experience with infants. Hawke placed the baby down on the bed, and buried her head in her hands. “Could you please take her for a few minutes? I just….I can’t right now.”

Fenris froze, as he stared at the squirming child on the bed. Her cheeks were wet with tears and her arms and legs were flailing about. He took a step forward, but then froze dead in his tracks. Hawke looked up at him with a questioning eye. “What is it?”

“Could you hand her to me?”

Hawke raised an eyebrow, then exhaled deeply. “You still won’t pick her up by yourself? Fenris, you’re her father.”

“But what if I injure her?”

Hawke stood up with a smile. “Trust me, you won’t. Come here. I’ll tell you what to do.”

Fenris moved to where Hawke was standing in front of Sadie. “Place one hand gently under her neck to support her, and just cradle her with your other arm.” She took his hand in hers, and placed it under Sadie’s neck just as she instructed. Hawke removed her hand to allow Fenris to lift her on his own. He carefully scooped the baby up, his heart pounding aggressively within him. He held Sadie close to his chest as she cried. “Shh,” he tried to soothe her, and rocked her gently as he had seen Hawke do many times before. To his surprise, her wails became sobs, and she opened her green eyes to peer into his own, her lip in a pout.

“Well, would you look at that,” Hawke said with a short laugh. “Why is it that she only listens to her fathers? I’m the one that gave birth to her, the little traitor.”

Fenris chuckled, and gently ran a finger under Sadie’s pouted lip. The baby reached up, and wrapped her tiny hand around his digit. “You look tired Hawke, get some sleep. I will handle it from here.”

“Are you sure?” She asked, hesitantly.

“Yes. She is my daughter, and I will see that she is taken care of. It is my responsibility too, after all.”

Hawke planted a chaste kiss on his lips before plopping down onto their bed. “Oh, I’m going to enjoy this,” she said with a yawn before closing her eyes. Fenris chuckled, glancing at her once more before leaving her to get some well deserved rest. He bounced his little girl in his arms as he walked down the hall, and soon, she too was fast asleep.


	15. Patience

“You know darling, my finger isn’t a chew toy,” Anders said as he held Sadie in his lap. At three months old she had already started to chew on everything. .

“She’s probably teething,” Hawke said gently, as she sat beside Anders on the bed. Sadie looked up into her father’s eyes, and gave him a toothless grin, before clamping down in his index finger once more. Anders winced.

“Yep. I’d say you’re right about that.” He removed his finger. Sadie stuck out her bottom lip and began to whimper. Anders sighed, surrendering his finger once again, and the infant immediately resumed her sucking. “You Hawke women, I can never say no to you.”

“I’d say she already has you wrapped around her little finger,” Hawke chuckled, running her fingers through Anders’ messy locks.

“Well, she’s certainly taken a liking to mine,” he pouted.

“Here, let me hold her for a minute.”

“But, cuddle time isn’t over yet.” he protested, shooting Hawke the most pathetically adorable look she’d ever seen.

“Well, now we know where she mastered the puppy-eyed look from,” she huffed. “Cuddle time is always over when she starts putting up a fuss, and then you have no issue handing her over to me. She’s my daughter too, you know.”

“Oh, alright,” Anders said in defeat, handing their little bundle of joy over to Hawke. She held baby Sadie in her arms, kissing her forehead gently. The infant cooed in her mother’s arms, looking up at her with big, bright eyes. Sadie began to gurgle and shriek in excitement, making both parents laugh.

“Well, miss Sadie, you certainly have a lot to say today,” Hawke said, stroking her daughter under her chin, to which Sadie responded by babbling more. “Really? Did Daddy really do that when Mommy was away? You don’t say.”

“Tattle tale,” Anders chuckled, stroking his daughter’s tuft of dark hair. Sadie looked excitedly over to Anders, and squealed even louder.

“For a moment, I thought she was upset,” Fenris said, as he entered the room. His hair was a mess, and his sword had blood along the blade.

“Another exciting day?” Hawke asked, clearly unable to hide the jealousy in her voice.

“Meredith has us looking all over the city for three escaped mages. She requested you, but I said you still weren’t ready for battle, should it come to that.”

“Well, I am all healed up now. Perhaps it’s time for me to get back out there.”

“Love, you’ve only just had a baby.” Anders said, stroking her arm.

“Three months ago. And for the past six weeks I have been training with Aveline on her days off. I’m ready Anders.”

“Are you certain, Hawke?” Fenris asked, coming to sit down on the edge of the bed.

“I am. And get off the clean sheets. You’re covered in I-don’t-even-want-to-know-what.”

Fenris smirked and stood. “My mistake. I will go and get cleaned up.”

When Fenris departed the room, Anders let out a deep sigh. “I don’t want to have to worry about you, you know.”

“Then don’t. Come with us.”

“One of us should stay with the baby. Maker forbid something were to go wrong.” His sullen voice made Hawke look up from their child and into his eyes. Genuine concern was laced throughout his features.

“Anders,” she said softly, stroking his chin. “I know you wish I was like other women; that I could be content about staying home and raising a family. I love Sadie, but it’s not enough for me. That’s not who I am.”

“I know that, love, and that’s one of the many reasons why I fell for you. I just need to know that you’re ready. It’s been a long time since you’ve been in a real fight.”

Hawke let out a curt laugh. “Oh, you think Aveline’s been going soft on me?”

“No, I suppose that would be unlike her.” He answered, his voice calm once again. “Look who tired herself out.” he said, motioning to the sleeping form in Hawke’s arms. Anders gingerly scooped Sadie up, and lay her down in her crib in the far side of the room. Hawke let out a sigh of relief when the movement hadn’t woken her. Anders was swiftly at her side again, and began kissing her shoulder blade.

“Your skin is so soft,” he murmured, as he kissed all the way up to her neck, his hands roaming over her torso. Hawke pulled away from him, and tucked herself into the covers.

“Sorry, I’m just not -”

“In the mood. I know. It’s alright.” He finished the statement before she could, clearly having heard it many times. Even as tactful as Anders was, he was not able to hide the frustration in his voice. Hawke’s libido seemed to have died since the birth of their child. For a month and a half, her body had been healed, and she was able to resume sexual activity. As much as she tried to entertain the idea, she just couldn’t get herself in the mood. Anytime Anders or Fenris touched her intimately, she immediately pulled away. It made her feel frustrated and hopeless, knowing she had not one but two amazing men who loved her, and she had no desire to be intimate with either of them. Fenris had stopped trying to initiate anything all together, but Anders wasn’t ready to give up just yet. A part of Hawke just wished he would.

“What’s wrong?” Her thoughts were interrupted by the concern in Anders’ voice.

“Will I ever feel the way I used to?”

“Childbirth can take a lot out of you. It sometimes takes awhile to get back into the swing of things.”

“But what if it takes more than just a while. Surely you’ll get frustrated and want to find...relief somehow.”

“Just what are you saying, Hawke?”

Hawke groaned, turning away from him, unbelieving what she was about to say. “Maybe I’ve been selfish in wanting you two all to myself. You’ve shared me so...maybe I should return the favour.”

She felt the bed shift as Anders sat upright. His hands were upon her, as he turned her over to face him again. “Don’t. That’s not what you want.”

“But it’s what’s fair.”

“I’m willing to wait for you Hawke. Maker, I waited for you for three years.”

“I’d prefer to just allow you to do it now, rather than find out later that you got tired of waiting for me to be ready.”

“Are you trying to suggest that I’d...what? Betray you?”

“You have needs, Anders. I...I’m just saying maybe someone else would be more appreciative of your advances.”

“Name one person.”

“Well, maybe Isabela. I know she wouldn’t say no to you. And I’ve heard the way she talks about Fenris.”

“Absolutely not,” Fenris said, as he strode in the room, his hair dripping wet from his bath. “This is absurd, that you would even suggest such a thing.”

“How long have you been standing there?”

“Long enough. I do not wish to bed the pirate.”

“Nor do I,” Anders chimed in.

“Oh for the love of the Maker, do you two really think I am that dense? She’s gorgeous, experienced, and I have seen the way both of your eyes linger when she leans over.” She said firmly. Fenris looked away uncomfortably and Anders took her hand in his.

“Yes, I may have… glanced at Isabela a few times. It’s a little hard not to when she puts it all out there the way she does. But that does not mean that I would sleep with her because you are still adjusting to motherhood. Hawke, love, I know you’re frustrated. But please, just give it some time.” His hand stroked her cheek and she was forced to meet his eyes.

“Do you really mean that?”

“I do.”

Fenris cleared his throat, and as she looked up, she saw the sincerity in his eyes. “A year ago, I was invited to be a part of this...arrangement. I admit, it has been trying at times, but I would not risk what we have here. If you need time, I am all too happy to wait for you, Hawke. As long as you have need for me, I will remain at your side.”

A smile spread across her face and she allowed herself to relax. “You both have no idea how relieved I am to hear that. The thought of either of you with Isabela…” Her stomach practically turned at the thought.

“Then why would you suggest such a thing?” Fenris asked, his hand finding hers.

“I want you to be happy. If that meant having to share you, the way you do with me, I’d make peace with it eventually. I wouldn’t like it, but I’d rather that than lose you all together.”

“You needn’t worry,” Fenris voice said, soothing her concerns. “I am yours.”

Hawke let out a chuckle. “Just how did I get so lucky?” Just at that moment, the baby started fussing yet again.

“You were saying?” Fenris said, raising an eyebrow.

“I wouldn’t change it for the world.”

 

Upon the next day, it was agreed that Hawke would once again join her companions in aiding the city - aiding Meredith to be precise. Hawke wasn’t exactly thrilled about the idea at first, but Fenris appealed to her that keeping blood mages off the street would make Kirkwall safer, and therefore safer for Sadie. There was some debate between who would stay at home with Sadie, as neither of the men wanted to leave Hawke’s side. She rolled her eyes as the two of them bickered back and forth, as if she were some fragile maiden. Anders didn’t particularly want to help find the escaped mages, as he believed it was in their rights to be free, so Fenris debated that it was the mage who should stay at home. Anders rebutted that it was he who had the healing skills, so if Hawke were to come into harm’s way, he could aid her. Fenris went quiet for a few moments, finally agreeing that Anders was probably right (a statement that left Anders and Hawke both in shock). 

The previous day, her companions had tracked down and were forced to kill a mage named Evelina. That left Hawke with two more mages to find. She decided to start with an elven mage named Huon. They visited his wife in the Lowtown alienage. It appeared that she was not certain where he was, but they decided to return at night, to see if he would come to his wife then. Hawke’s gut instinct was right, but they arrived seconds too late, only to find the elf woman’s body lifeless on the ground. Hawke raged, angry at herself for not having been there to protect the young woman, and furious at Huon for murdering his wife, of all people. Blood mage - that’s what he was, the very thing that made her kind so hated and feared, the reason that could take away hers, Anders, and possibly even Sadie’s freedom one day. Huon unleashed his powers, summoning a few shades in the process. Hawke let out an enraged cry, charging after the elf. 

“Hawke, careful!” Anders cried out to her, but she heard nothing but the ferocious pounding of her heart and her feet slapping across the hard ground. Huon looked at her, his dark eyes narrowed and a perverse smile across his face.

“You bastard!” She yelled, striking him with her staff. She slashed his torso with the bladed end, streams of blood falling to the ground, but if Huon felt any pain, he didn’t show it. He shot forth his arms, casting a force spell that took hold of Hawke and hurtled her into a nearby wall. She gasped as the hard blow left her breathless, her entire body searing with white-hot pain. She felt Anders’ healing wash over her and before she could fully grasp what had occurred, she leaped back to her feet. Keeping her distance this time, she engaged Huon from afar while the others dealt with the demons he summoned. She hit him with a blast of ice, enough to freeze him in place. By then, the shades were defeated, and Aveline jumped in front of the blood mage, killing him with one final blow. Huon lay dead, face down, no more than ten feet away from his wife. The sight left Hawke feeling a dark, empty pit in her gut, as she turned away from the blood chilling sight.

“We’ll report to Meredith in the morning. Let’s all get some rest.”

“I’ll tell my men what’s happened here. Someone will deal with the bodies.”

“Yes, let’s not let Kitten wake to find a heap of bodies at her door. The only good place to find a body when you wake up is in your bed,” Isabela chuckled. “It was great to have you back, Hawke.”

Hawke nodded at her friend, but said nothing. Anders crossed to her side, as they made their way back to the Hightown estate.

“Are you alright, Hawke? Do you need any healing?”

“I’m fine,” she said a little coldly. 

Anders didn’t press the issue any further, walking the rest of the way in relative silence. As soon as she arrived home, she asked Orana to draw her a bath, but was surprised to find that Fenris had already taken care of it, awaiting her return. She forced a small smile his way, saying nothing as she walked past him and into the bathing chambers, locking the door shut behind her. 

The water was a little cool by now, but she didn’t care, diving right in and scrubbing herself off with a bar of soap. She had a few dark bruises along her sides and back, and she winced as she passed them over. Her mind began racing. Would Sadie be taken from her loving arms and brought to the Circle if she turned out to possess magic? Anders was safe for now because of her influence, but what if her standing in Hightown and as Champion was no longer enough? Tears welled up in her eyes, and she blinked them away. She hated that she was tracking down mages for Meredith, but as tonight proved, some were indeed very dangerous and needed to be locked away. Poor Nyssa. It was unlike Hawke to get so emotional over a stranger, as she had to harden her heart and deal with death so often, but something about this woman in particular tugged at her. She had been so close to saving her. Hawke let out a sigh, standing from the tub and drying herself off. She left her robes in a basket on the floor, grabbing her bathrobe and tying it around her waist. She headed right to her room, where Anders and Fenris seemed to be waiting for her anxiously.

“Hawke,” Anders said calmly as she walked past him right to where Sadie was cooing in her crib. She picked up her infant, holding her close in her arms as she sat in the rocking chair.

“Sweetheart, are you alright?” Anders asked again. Hawke ignored him, kissing Sadie’s cheeks, and murmuring quietly.

“I won’t let them take you from me. I promise,” she said, her voice breaking. At this Fenris rose, where he had remained quiet. He and Anders exchanged a worried look, before Anders spoke again.

“Love, what’s wrong?”

“You saw what happened tonight,” she answered finally, her voice quivering, and her eyes angry. “They keep giving the Templars a reason to lock us up - to cage us like animals! What if Sadie’s a mage? I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if they took her away from us.”

“I would not allow that to happen,” Fenris said, coming to stand at her side.

“Because she’s your daughter? You’ve always said mages should be locked away!”

“Not you Hawke. Not Sadie. You know the reasons in which my opinions have been formed; I lived firsthand to see what evil mages can do. But you, you have shown me that not all mages are evil. I trust in you, and I will do everything in my power to protect you both.”

“I know you worry about Sadie, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t as well. I have seen the injustices of the Circle, myself. But I promise you, if there is a way to prevent it from happening, I will do what it takes. You have my word.” Anders said softly, as he squeezed her shoulder. She allowed a tear to roll down her cheek, before wiping it away. Fenris came forward, and took Sadie, who was now sleeping, from her arms.

“You need to rest tonight. Let me bring the baby to Orana. She can look after her for the night.”

“No, Fenris. It’s alright, I’m fine -”

“I insist, Hawke.”

Hawke gave him a gentle smile. “Alright. Do as you will.”

When Fenris left the room with their daughter, Hawke hung her head down, burying it in her hands. “Maybe you were right,” she said to Anders. “Maybe I’m not ready to be out there yet.”

“No, Hawke. I was wrong. We need you out there.”

“We?”

“Mages. Tonight proved that there are too many reasons for people to fear us. But you give our people hope that one day, we can be free. The people of Kirkwall adore you. They need you to keep the streets safe. It was wrong of me to think otherwise.” He said, gently stroking her cheek. She trembled at his touch, fighting back new tears that his powerful words invoked.

“I thought my hormones would be back to normal once the baby was born. Just look at me,” she laughed. Anders knelt in front of her, kissing her softly. 

“You’re a mother now, Hawke. You will always feel strongly when it comes to the safety of our child. That doesn’t make you weak, or any less capable of being a strong and courageous fighter. You’re still the same woman I fell in love with.”

Hawke felt a surge of desire, as she wound her fingers into Anders’ hair, and began kissing him feverishly. He was right, she was still the same person. Tonight proved it. She could be a mother, and protect Kirkwall. Nothing had to change. She nipped at his lower lip, causing her lover to stifle a groan.

“I need you,” she whispered into his ear. Fenris returned at that moment, closing the door behind him. She shot a mischievous look in his direction. “I need both of you.”

The elf stood there looking a little confused, so Hawke strode her way over to him, pinning him into the door as she claimed his mouth passionately. She pressed her body into his, feeling him harden instantly.

“This is...most unexpected,” he finally managed to breath out when Hawke had left his lips and was kissing her way down his neck.

“Are you going to start complaining?” Hawke asked, meeting his eyes with hers. 

“Never,” he said, kissing her once again. “I have missed your touch.”

Anders was suddenly behind her, suckling at the base of her neck as his hands gripped her waist. She felt hazy, as her lust for both of them took over all coherent thought. Fenris slipped his tongue into her mouth, and she groaned, massaging hers against it. Anders’ hands pulled at the rope that held her bathrobe together, yanking it from her body and the garment pooled at her feet. Hawke stood completely naked between the two men, feeling the cool air form bumps across her flesh. 

“Your back is completely bruised,” Anders said, as he kissed just below her earlobe, nipping at it gently. He traced his hands to where she had been injured, letting his mana flow him as he healed the area. His hands were warm on her body, and she felt like melting into him. Her eyes shut, as she leaned her head against Anders’ chest. Fenris took the opportunity to palm her breasts ever so gently. His hands felt soothing against her tender flesh. She couldn’t remember why she hadn’t wanted this before - her nerves sang at every little flicker, touch, kiss, and lick they gave to her. Before she knew it, both men were carrying her to the bed. She lay in the middle, completely naked, with a lover on each side of her.

“Too many clothes,” she grumbled, running her hands under both of their shirts.

Fenris chuckled deeply, as Anders kissed her once more. Her eyes shut, revelling in the feeling of giving into her desires. She could feel both men moving about, hearing clothes and belts being tossed to the ground. Anders pinned her under his hard body, kissing and suckling down her torso. Hawke gasped when he reached above her navel, and now it was Fenris who claimed her lips to silence her cries. A pair of fingers began to part her folds, and not long after a searching tongue brushed against her clit. Hawke couldn’t help but buck up against the teasing mouth that tormented her so. She moaned into Fenris’ mouth, as he still gently kissed her, teasing her breasts with his deft finger. Anders lapped at her essences, twirling his tongue over her nub, as she thrashed on the bed from his efforts. She threw her head back, pulling away from Fenris and let out a loud passionate cry.

“You are enjoying yourself I see,” Fenris whispered into her ear, before suckling her lobe. Hawke did not answer in words, only moaning louder as Anders’ tongue worked her fast. One of his fingers teased at her entrance, circling around the area before he ever so slowly pushed it in. Hawke tensed, as she felt a slight pinch of discomfort. Anders stopped, looking up at her.

“Are you alright?”

“Yes,” she breathed. “It just feels...different.”

Anders sat up, as he stroked her leg. “Intercourse may hurt a little the first few times after childbirth. Not much unlike how losing your virginity felt.”

Hawke sighed. “Lovely. Just the experience I’d love to go through again.”

“Do you wish for us to stop?” Fenris asked calmly beside her.

“No, please. I want this.”

“Don’t worry love,” Anders responded just above a whisper. “I promise we’ll take good care of you.” He lowered his head back to its spot between the junction of her thighs. This time she felt his slick tongue toying with her entrance, before he eased it inside. A jolt of pleasure shot through her, as her lover pushed his tongue in and out. She gripped the bedsheets tightly, letting out another moan, as Fenris began kissing her again while he fondled her breasts. Anders moved his tongue back up to her clit, flicking it back and forth, as he pushed a single finger inside of her. It felt better this time, not causing Hawke any amount of pain. Soon after a second finger joined the first, testing and stretching her depths. His digits slipped out with ease, as her desire grew. Her hand blindly reached for Fenris’ member, and when she found it, she began to stroke him eagerly. He groaned at her touch, his fingers winding in her dark hair as he began to whisper in Arcanum. Anders’ lips wrapped around her bundle of nerves, sucking gently, throwing her over the edge. Hawke’s legs clamped around his head as she cried out, her inner muscles squeezing his fingers tightly. Every muscle in her body seemed to shake and convulse with sheer pleasure. He suckled fervently, coaxing every last aftershock out of her body. When she couldn’t take it any longer, she pushed his head away, breathing heavily. Anders chuckled, wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. He leisurely climbed over her, gazing upon her face as she looked up into his soft, honey eyes.

“Ready, sweetheart?” he asked, nudging his erection at her entrance. Fenris removed her hand from his member, entwining his fingers in hers as he studied her face. Hawke gave a nod, and slowly Anders sunk in. She felt the tight pain again, as her body accommodated his length. Her fingers squeezed Fenris’, as she winced. Her free hand wrapped around Anders’ back, holding him tightly. Anders pulled out gradually, and then pushed forward again. He watched her intently, moving ever so gently within her. After a minute or so, she felt her body completely relax, and the first bouts of pleasure blossom within her. Anders thrust upwards just so, hitting that spot inside of her that made her see stars.

“Maker,” she trembled, her body becoming wetter by the second. She turned to face Fenris, her eyes dark and dilated. “I want you in my mouth,” she groaned, as Anders began to pick up the pace. The elf knelt beside her face, slowly pushing the tip of his member past her lips. Hawke wrapped her lips around him and sucked. Fenris hissed through his teeth, and shallowly began to dip in and out of her mouth, as she could not move much. He stroked her hair as he did so, whispering things she couldn’t understand, but from the tone of his voice, she knew they were loving. Anders’ fingers were upon her again, as he lightly caressed her nub as he continue to drive in and out of her. She moaned around Fenris loudly, causing the elf’s fingers to tug on her hair involuntarily. 

“Did I hurt you?” he asked worried.

Hawke let off him with a grin. “No, I liked it,” she said breathlessly, before taking him into her mouth again. Her tongue swirled lazily around the head, making Fenris shut his eyes tight. She loved having him there, being able to pleasure him and make Fenris lose all inhibitions. He was usually wound tight, but in these moments, it drove her mad to see his resolve disappear. After a minute, he spoke again.

“I need to have you,” he growled, and when she looked up she saw that his eyes were narrow, and almost purely black. 

“What do you want, love?” Anders asked, his movements stopping. 

“I want you to switch off now,” she said, excitedly thinking about Fenris being inside her once again. Anders removed himself from her depths, as Hawke turned to face Fenris. “How do you want me?” She asked, running her fingers down his chest. Fenris closed his eyes, letting out a deep breath.

“I would like for you to ride me,” he answered, his voice even deeper than usual.

“Lie down then.”

Fenris lay flat on his back, his head towards the end of the bed. Hawke moved to straddle him when Anders tugged on her arm.

“I have an idea.” He lifted her in his arms, then placed her above Fenris so that she was facing away from the elf and towards him. She allowed Anders to have control over her body. He pushed her down the Fenris’ length, until she was impaled by his hard member. Both Hawke and Fenris groaned at the contact. Anders stood at the head of the bed, his hand resting on the wall for support. His cock jutted before her mouth, so she took him inside as she began to gyrate up and down on Fenris. She moaned as she began to move, the position allowing Fenris to hit new angles that drove her near madness. Both men began to move on their own accord, Fenris gripping her hips, and Anders gently holding her face still with one hand as he slowly glided in and out of her waiting mouth. Hawke completely submitted, letting them direct her pleasure. She flicked her tongue along the head of Anders’ cock, causing the mage to grunt, his actions becoming more frantic.

“Yes love, like that,” he murmured under his breath. Fenris had picked up his pace, his hips snapping up into her frantically. He too was losing what little control he had left.

“Bonum,” he hissed through his teeth. “So tight, Hawke. I will not last long.”

She chuckled around Anders’ member, speeding her movements on the mage. He gripped his fingers through her hair, releasing himself into her mouth. He tasted musky and familiar, as she swallowed his essence down. Fenris had reached his hand around and begun to stroke her clit. She let herself fall away from Anders, laying her back against Fenris’ chest. He continued to pump into her as he pleasured her with his hand. Hawke felt her body convulsing, the pressure in her abdomen building.

“Oh Fenris,” she gasped, trembling above him.

“I want to feel you, Hawke. Let yourself go,” he whispered into her ear. His voice threw her into another orgasm. She screamed out loudly, as her muscles convulsed around his invading member. Fenris pushed up into her, his fingers bruising her hips as he bucked into her with wild abandon. Moments later, he found his end, climaxing with a rasping cry. The room seemed to spin around her as Hawke felt herself being turned to her side. She lay breathless between two damp bodies, all three of them spent.

“Well,” she broke the silence. “Thank you both for reminding me what I’d be missing out on.”

Fenris laughed softly beside her. “You are most welcome.”

Hawke fell asleep soon after. It calmed her to have both men stay the night with her. Fenris liked his privacy, and it was rare that he would share a bed with two others. Hawke usually rotated between bedrooms, not wanting to exclude either one of her lovers. But tonight, he stayed. She slept soundly that night, her inner voice finally calmed.

 

In the dead of night, Anders crept quietly away from the bed. The moonlight cast a glare into the room, allowing him to see the two sleeping forms. Fenris lay with an arm draped over Hawke, as if he were protecting her from something...or someone, he thought. He left the room, heading directly to his private study. The mage slumped forward, going through his many letters from the mage underground. Things were dire indeed. Every day it seemed that more of his fellow mages were being hauled off to the Circle, many made Tranquil for little to no reason. Justice was becoming increasingly impatient. 

“The elf is with her. You are no longer needed.” He would hear, more often than not. And it was true. He needed it to be so. Fenris would take care of Hawke...and Sadie. He loved them both, just as Anders did. Seeing Hawke frantic as she was that day about losing their baby to the Circle finalized the dilemma that had been running rampant in his mind for months. He needed to do something to stop Meredith. He couldn’t bear the thought of his little girl being taken away, of either of them falling to the hands of the Templars. A choice had to be made, and soon.

Anders’ heart felt heavy, as the lump in his throat grew. “At least he’ll take care of them,” he said mournfully, as he stood and left for Darktown.


	16. Darkness

Over the next few weeks, Fenris noticed that Anders was acting especially strangely, even for him. When Sadie was born, Anders had spent most of his time fawning over the little girl he so desperately wanted. Now, when he wasn’t at the clinic, he seemed to be holed up in his private study, until all hours of the night. Naturally, Fenris enjoyed all of his extra alone time with Hawke and Sadie. However, he found himself growing curious as to what had gotten into the mage. It was peculiar, really, that he would even care at all. But in recent months, something had clearly changed in his opinion towards Anders. He couldn’t be sure if it was the daring rescue, or that Anders had allowed Fenris to be as involved as he was, but he no longer felt such a strong distaste for the man. Granted, they would never see eye to eye, but they had become allies. Fenris scoffed when Isabela once asked him if he had ever, how did she put it ‘plundered his booty’. Fenris would never see the mage in that light, that was certain, though he couldn’t help but wonder what was going on, and if Anders was in some kind of trouble.

Hawke strolled into the his bedroom, freshly washed after a long day of fighting. The baby slept soundly at the far end of the room. She flopped onto the bed where he had been awaiting her safe return, curling up beside him. Fenris gazed at her fondly, stroking her damp, washed hair. 

“Mmm, that feels nice,” she responded, her voice laced with sleep. He grinned, and continued to run his fingers along her scalp, lingering over her temples, and massaging in slow, deliberate circles. Hawke let out another blissful sigh, her hands stretching up to cup his face and pull him down in a long, languid kiss. Her tongue stroked against his, and Fenris could feel his body instantly responding to her. Vanilla and lavender filled his nostrils, the remnants of the soap she used during her bath fragranced her silky skin. Before he knew what was happening, she was on top of him, pulling the string that held her bathrobe together. Her breasts came to view, full and luscious. Calloused hands from years of wielding a sword caressed them gently, causing soft sighs to leave her lips.

“We must remain quiet,” he whispered against her ear. “What a shame it would be if the baby woke.”

Hawke giggled, a sound he so loved and began pulling his shirt up over his head. “I will try my best, but you know how much I love feeling you inside of me.” Her words made him groan, already anticipating what was soon to come. Scaling down his toned body, Hawke licked along a lyrium line, careful that her touch was feather light. Her fingers worked fast at his breeches, pulling them and his smalls over his hips and down his legs. Fenris tossed his head back as she licked all the way up his shaft, taking him into her mouth, and sucking on the way back down. Gripping the sheets tightly, he thrust shallowly into her mouth, his body lifting to meet her movements. He would never tire of her attentions; each time he felt a little surprised that she would want to perform such an act on him. Even though they had been together for over a year now, Fenris was still unused to being touched this way. It still felt so new, so forbidden, but it was a feeling he never wanted to let go. All thoughts fled his mind as Hawke sucked tight around his cock, her hand pumping up and down the shaft, her mouth working the tip. She was too good, it would end all too soon if she continued.

“Enough, Hawke,” Fenris growled, pulling her up his body, then he kissed her hard. She whimpered against his mouth as two of his fingers entered her core.

“You are dripping with desire already,” he said against her ear, as he kissed down her neck. 

“Take me, now.” 

“So soon?” He smirked, pumping his fingers in and out of her slowly, using his thumb to toy with her clit.

“Please Fenris,” she gasped, thrusting her hips forward to chase his touch.

“Very well.” He removed his damp fingers, and aligned his member at her entrance. Hawke sank down on him, stretching around him. He sucked a hiss through his teeth. Ever so gently, he caressed her swaying breasts as she began to ride him. He watched her move, their bodies harmonizing as one, as if it were a dance they had performed together flawlessly and perfected many times before. Sweat glistened her pale body, a beautiful contrast to his tawny skin. He placed a hand on each of her hips, assisting her in her movements. He couldn’t take his eyes off of where they were joined, watching himself disappear inside of her. Fenris let out a low, almost feral sounding growl, as he began to pump in and out of her with earnest. Hawke let out a sharp sigh.

“Shh,” he whispered, cupping her face and pulling her down for a passionate kiss. She quietly moaned into his mouth, and Fenris snaked down a hand to toy with her clit. Hawke sucked on his bottom lip hard, as she struggled to remain quiet. She soaked him with her arousal, and her inner muscles began to tighten around him.

“Let go, Hawke,” he whispered in her ear. His fingers circled and stroked her swollen nub, and within moments, she came apart above him. Swallowing her moan with another kiss, he continued to rub her through her orgasm, shifting his hips up into her. Their chests stuck together from their mixed perspiration as Hawke’s breathing became shallow. Fenris grabbed onto her hips once again, and pummeled into her with earnest. The slapping sounds of their bodies connecting echoed in the room. Hawke chuckled against his neck, a breathy joyful sound.

“I want to feel you finish inside of me, Fenris,” she breathed softly beside his ear. “You feel so good.” Her breath was warm against his neck, as he raced to finish. Shaking with pleasure, he emptied inside of her, gasping quietly into her damp hair. Her sheath hugged him tightly, gripping and squeezing him as he climaxed. 

“Mmm, that was nice,” Hawke sighed, as she kissed his neck softly. Fenris chuckled, brushing her hair from her face so he could stare into her brilliant eyes.

“It was.”

Hawke lay in his arms, softly sleeping beside him. He wished things could always remain this way. Unfortunately, it was not to be.

 

It was a week later that Fenris decided to confront Anders about his absence in the Hawke estate. He had bore witness to Hawke frantically pacing in the middle of night, worried for the safety of the mage. Rarely did he come home, even to eat, and he refused to give Hawke an answer for his truancy. The elf decided to take matters in his own hands. This behaviour was unacceptable for a father and spouse. 

He made his way to the Darktown clinic, trying to rack his brain for just what he was going to say to Anders when he arrived. Chances were, if he wouldn’t grace Hawke with an answer, Fenris would not be successful either. But he had not seen the sadness in her eyes, the worry upon her face. He would make him understand the distress it was causing the mother of their child. 

When he arrived at the Darktown clinic, the lantern was out, which either meant Anders was not there, or he did not wish to be disturbed. Fenris knocked on the door, waited, and knocked again when he had been unanswered. He heard some rustling from inside, follow with a grumbled “I’m busy, come back later.”

“It is I,” Fenris called out. 

“Fenris...I really can’t talk right now. Go away.”

“You will open this door mage, or I will break it down.”

Anders did not answer, and after another minute of silence, Fenris had enough. “So be it.” In haste, he grabbed the handle of the door with a tight grip, and pushed against the door hard. It took him no more than two shoves before he was able to push his way through. The door completely fell off its hinges as the elf stood in the doorway. Anders narrowed his eyes, which were sunken and blood shot.

“What in the Void do you think you’re doing?! Now how am I going to keep the Templars out if they come snooping around?”

“If the Templars really wanted to investigate your clinic, that door would do little to prevent them.”

Anders let out an annoyed growl, eyeing down the elf. “Just what do you want Fenris? I’m going to have to fix that door now on top of everything else I was already doing.”

“And what exactly are you doing? Hawke has been sick with grief.”

“Did she ask you to come?”

“No. I came on my own behalf.”

“Why?”

“Because she is everything to me, and I do not wish to see her suffer a minute longer. Tell me what’s so important that you leave her at home with the baby.”

“You wouldn’t understand.”

“Has this anything to do with that mage rebellion of yours?”

“Leave, Fenris. Now.” Anders said, inching his way towards him. Fenris stood tall, glowering at the blonde man before him.

“I will not. Answer me.”

“Why? So you can run to Hawke? Why do you even care? Why aren’t you taking advantage that I’m gone? Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted?”

The words sank in, as Fenris’ expression softened. Of course, things would be ideal if it were just he and the woman he loved, with their beautiful daughter, but something was amiss here. He knew Anders was meddling in something big, something dangerous.

“So you’re giving up, after all this time? You’re the one who wanted a family, who came to me with our arrangement, if I recall correctly.”

“There are more important things that need my energy.”

“You are a fool, mage. To give up Hawke, to give up Sadie….”

“I am doing this for them!” Anders hollered, pushing Fenris into the nearby wall. His eyes glowed, his skin crackling with bright blue light. Justice...that demon was influencing the mage, and he was powerless to stop him. 

“The demon,” Fenris snarled, stalking back towards him, “he clouds your judgement.”

“I am no demon!” Justice boomed behind Anders’ voice. “Leave this place elf! Anders does not concern you any longer.”

“Stay away from Hawke. You are a menace. I knew it was a fool’s notion to place trust in a maleficar.” Fenris growled, turning on his heel to leave. Anger seethed throughout his body, his own markings lighting up in reaction to the turmoil boiling through his veins. He was just a few paces from the door when Anders spoke in an utterly broken voice.

“Please, Fenris. Please take care of them.” The elf turned around to see Anders hunched over a cot, breathing heavily. His skin and eyes had returned to their normal state as his hair hung in his face. A broken sob escaped the man’s trembling lips, and Fenris was loathe to admit it, but he felt sorry for him. Yes, it was true that it was his own doing; that he took a fade spirit into his body, and this was forever changed, but there was no way he could know the torment it would bring him.

“What are you saying?” He asked, his voice calm as he took a few steps forward. “Are you in any trouble? What have you done?”

“No matter what I do now, I will not be around forever. I am a Grey Warden, you know this. Perhaps deep down, that is why I wanted you in the equation. I will not be there to see Sadie grow up. I need you to promise me, Fenris, that...that you’ll take care of them when I’m gone. Whether it be tomorrow, a year, ten years from now.”

Fenris paused a few moments, letting his words sink in. The mage spoke truly, he knew from rumours that Wardens did not live as long as most, but there was more to it than Anders was leading on. 

“Your demon; he plots something.”

“Justice will not rest until I come up with a solution to Meredith’s madness. The taint in my blood, it has corrupted him as well. I...I don’t know how much time we have left.”

“He is a menace.” Fenris let out a sigh of defeat. He had no idea what he was going to do about Anders. He needed to speak with Hawke about what the mage had said. “I promise you, they will be safe with me. You have my word. I will leave you now. Are you sure you wish to remain here? It would please Hawke if you returned.”

Anders looked towards the ground, pain laced throughout eyes. “I can’t.”

“Very well.” Fenris left in the dead of night, to inform Hawke that something was amiss. 

 

“You are certain?”

“Yes. Those were his exact words. Something is deeply troubling him, Hawke. A mage like that - like him, is weak. He is no longer able to withstand the spirit’s influence. I fear he will take action, and soon.”

“I need to find him.”

“I doubt he will be of sound mind to speak with you at this hour. The spirit showed himself in my presence. It was...unpleasant.”

“Come with me, then. Please.” 

“Very well.”

Hawke informed Orana that she and Fenris would return shortly, and headed off in the direction of Anders’ clinic. It was half past midnight when they arrived, and while Fenris was wanting nothing more than to curl up in his warm bed and rest, Hawke was adamant that they confront Anders straight away. Her eyes went wide as she saw the door to his clinic was off it’s hinges.

“I...er, may have taken some extreme measures.”

She let out a sigh of relief, before entering the clinic. “Anders,” she called out softly, then gasped in horror. Fenris looked around the clinic, and saw what caused her dismay. Every cot in the clinic had been overturned, books scattered across the floor, some of their pages ripped and crumbled on the ground. Hawke began to rummage through his things, searching for a sign of where he could be.

“Perhaps he went home.”

“But why is his clinic in this state? No. Something's not right here.” She walked over to the far end of the clinic, bringing a hand to clamp over her mouth. Fenris joined her, and saw what caused her dismay. Anders’ staff. The mage would never leave without his weapon. It became clear to them both that someone had taken him. They destroyed his clinic and captured Anders.

“Meredith,” Hawke spat through her teeth.

“How can you be certain?”

“Who else would have done this? Of course it’s her! After everything I’ve done for her...for this city! How dare she?!”

“It was only a matter of time; everyone knows of Anders.”

“I don’t care. She is going to pay for this. I have to catch up to them, I need to help him!”

“Then we must move fast. Let us make haste to the Hanged Man, perhaps Varric and Isabela are awake and will be willing to help.”

The two ran all the way to Lowtown, all the while Hawke fighting tears that threatened to fall. Fenris couldn’t stop the knot that began to grow in his stomach. Something told him they were already too late, and that he would be unable to rescue Anders, the way the mage had once rescued him. 

 

Anders awoke from the deafening pounding in his head. It took him several moments to be able to open his eyes, one of them swollen shut from the brutal beating he received from the Templars. His ribs were broken, that was for sure. The room he lay in was mostly dark, save for the low light of the lantern across the room. Panic surged through him as he realised he couldn’t move his limbs, both his hands and legs were bound tight to the large table he lay upon. 

“You’re awake,” Meredith’s voice said from somewhere beside him. She stepped into view, a small smirk across her face. 

“Hawke will never let you get away with this,” he spat, his lip burning. 

“And what exactly do you think the Champion can do? She is only free because I have not requested her arrest.”

Justice stirred within him, and his skin burned with his presence. Anders struggled to remain in control, but the spirit would not be calmed. He completely took over, rocking the table as he fought with the restraints.”

“Hold him down!” she instructed the Templars who occupied the room. Harsh gauntleted hands held him down, piercing into his skin. Justice quickly retreated, realising that there was no point in struggling. They were defeated, this was the end. Meredith came closer, the lyrium branded metal poker in her hand. His eyes sagged, as his heart pounded furiously.

“No, please. Don’t do this,” he begged, his lip quivering. “Kill me. Please! Death would be a blessing compared to this.”

“I think not. Perhaps I will keep you in the Gallows, so your precious Champion will forever be reminded of what will happen should she decide to rebel against me.”

Anders tried one last time to fight, to get out of the binds that held him, but it was no use. Tears trickled from the corners of his eyes, as he closed them, thinking only of Hawke and Sadie, and how he had failed them. Goodbye, my loves, he thought to himself, as he felt the searing brand pierce into his forehead. After that - darkness.


	17. Wait

To Hawke’s dismay, she had to wait until the early hours of the morning before a boat was available to take them across to the Gallows. She paced back and forth, cursing while kicking over barrels. Fenris tried to calm her, only to get his hand shoved away. Varric stood uncomfortably beside them, and for once, had very little to say. A few narrow glares from Hawke was more than enough to make the usual chatty dwarf close his mouth. As soon as the first boat docked, Hawke shoved coin at the boatmen as she jumped aboard. “To the Gallows.” Her voice was hoarse from all the yelling she had done throughout the night.

The sun was just rising when the trio arrived at the Gallows. As they passed the main entrance, several Templars stopped them from getting through, one of which was Knight Captain Cullen.

“Let me through,” Hawke grit through her teeth. “I need to speak with Meredith.”

“I’m sorry Champion, but I cannot allow you to do that.”

“And why in the blight not?!”

“I am under strict orders not to let you, or any of your companions through for the time being.”

“Oh you’ll let me through alright,” Hawke stepped forward, and the two Templars at Cullen’s side drew their swords. Fenris grabbed Hawke’s arm, holding her back.

“Hawke, I do not think it is wise to be challenging the Knight Commander or her Templars.”

“Let go Fenris,” she snapped, withdrawing her arm for him. She turned back to Cullen, her eyes narrowed as rage seethed through her veins. “Either you call your Templars dogs off, or they will have me to deal with.”

She thought the Knight Captain would show some sign of anger, that he would accept her challenge, and she would be forced to fight him. Instead, his eyes gave way to what seemed to be guilt.

“Sister.” 

Hawke turned to see Carver, donned in his Templar uniform, peer at Cullen’s side.

“Carver! What’s going on? They won’t let me through. I know they have Anders. They must! Please, Carver.” 

“I…” Carver’s voice cracked as he bit on his lower lip, staring at the ground beneath his feet.

“Why won’t you look at me Carver?”

“I’m so sorry.” He breathed out, the words barely it to her ears. “The Knight Commander says she is free to pass. Please sister, don’t make things worse than they already are. Think...think of Sadie.”

“Maker, no….” she gasped, pushing her way past the Templars. She frantically moved about, her heart rampaging through her chest, making her feel deaf to anything else but it’s maddening beat. Please, let him be okay, please! she silently pleaded with the Maker. Suddenly, Fenris grabbed her pulling her to his chest. She tried to pull away, but he kept her close.

“Don’t look. Let’s just leave. It will do you no good to see this.” Hawke could feel the deep rumble of his voice against his chest. She fought in earnest now, thrashing in his arms.

“Let me go Fenris!” Her voice cracked, as she felt hot tears stinging her eyes. 

“I think you should listen to the elf, Hawke,” Varric finally said, in a tone she had never heard from him before. 

Finally she was able to free herself from Fenris’ grasp, as she turned around to see what they tried to protect her from. Every muscle in her body shook violently, as she stared down the gallows to see Anders, donning the mark of tranquility on his forehead. Her knees buckled from under her, causing her to fall to the ground, letting out a shrill scream. Fenris crouched down behind her, holding her to him as her tears fell freely.

“No!” she sobbed, quivering in his arms. She tried to speak, to yell, but all that came out was another hysterical cry. It felt like couldn’t even breathe, as if her lungs were collapsing in her chest, as if her body hadn’t the will to even live anymore. She once again escaped Fenris’ hold on her, and stumbled towards Anders desperately, as he stared blankly ahead. She cupped his face, turning him to look at her.

“Anders? P..please talk to me. Don’t you know who I am?”

“Yes.” he stated emotionlessly. “You go by the name Hawke. Many call you the Champion. We had relations once.”

His words were spoken matter-of-factly. Hawke’s lips trembled again, feeling as if she had been punched deep in her gut. “No, this can’t be real.”

“I do not understand.” Anders spoke. No, it wasn’t Anders, she told herself. This...thing wasn’t him. More tears fell from her face, as she gripped onto the collar of his new robes.

“Come back to me Anders! I know you’re in there somewhere. You have to be!” She shook him, and for just a brief moment, Hawke thought she saw a hint of emotion in his eyes - remorse. But as soon as it was there, it was replaced by the hollow-empty look he bore before.

“Champion, I must ask you to leave now.” Cullen said, snapping her out of her thoughts.

“No! Did you see that? He looked at me like he used to! He’s still in there.”

“That is impossible Champion, you and I both know that.”

Before Cullen could utter another word, Hawke turned and punched him in the jaw with all of her might. The templar stumbled and fell back, his hand grasping his bloodied face. In mere seconds, three templars were struggling to hold her back, as they prepared to arrest her. She fought in their arms, Varric and Fenris drawing their weapons, ready to defend her to the end.

“Let her go.” Cullen said coldly, wiping his face. Carver stood beside him, looking torn between defending his sister, and fulfilling his duty as a templar.

“Where is that bitch? I’ll gut her myself!” Hawke screamed at the top of her lungs. “Do you hear me you damned coward?!”

“Champion,” Cullen grit through his teeth. “I am doing you a favor by calling my men off. You should be arrested for that little stunt you pulled. Threatening the Knight Commander is not in you, or your family’s best interest.” He stepped forward, looking her dead in the eyes. “Are you going to comply? Or do you need to spend a few nights locked up in a cell, away from your child?”

“This isn’t over.” she growled.

“Sister, please.” Carver pleaded. 

“Call your templars off of me.” Hawke winced, as their gauntlets began to dig into her skin.

“Release her.” The Knight Captain commanded.

Finally the cruel arms freed her from their icy grip. Droplets of blood fell down her arms from where they had harshly grabbed her, but she hadn’t noticed. Nothing could compare to the unbearable pain and anguish that resided in her heart. 

“Let us leave this place,” Fenris whispered in her ear. His words fell on deaf ears. All she could do was look behind her as he lead her away, at the face she had loved for more than three years. She had failed him. There was no way she would ever forgive herself. Anders was stuck in his own worst nightmare. Hawke vowed to herself that Meredith would pay. One way or another, she would make the Knight Commander regret what she had done.

 

It took every ounce of self restraint for the mage to hold back from embracing his love when she pleaded with him to return to her. Seeing her distraught with tears running down her fair skin, pain laced throughout her voice; it nearly broke his resolve. He almost messed up, for a brief second losing his composure. It would have cost him everything had the Templar’s seen it themselves.

Anders was at a loss at what had occurred really; one minute the rite of tranquility was being performed on him, pulling him into the fade, for what he thought would be one last time. But while he was there, Justice began to vanish. “Anders,” he had spoke with fear in his voice, as his spirit form stood before him. “I grow weak. Do something. You must!” Even in the fade, the mage could feel the burning pain of the hot poker branding his skin. He fell to his knees, unable to breath. The pain was great, almost unbearable, causing Anders to release a sharp cry. His eyes tried to open, even through his endural. Justice vanquished right before his eyes, and for the first time in years, he no longer felt the fade spirit’s presence within his mind. He looked around panicked, seeing no sign of him any longer. Anders was suddenly aware of the voices around him. First Meredith, and then Knight Captain Cullen. 

“He will be awake soon.”

“What about Hawke? She’ll come looking for him, no doubt.”

“See to it that the Champion and those who travel with her do not gain entry to the Gallows. Not until my command.”

“As you wish.”

Anders could hear them conversing, but could not open his eyes. He was aware of what they said, and felt a deep anger in him rising. Hawke was a saviour to the city; many owed their lives to her, and this was how she was treated? He wanted to wring Meredith’s neck, now more than ever! But wait...if he were tranquil, why did he feel this way? His thoughts were still his own. No, something was not right about this whole situation. Was it possible that the rite of Tranquility had failed? Justice was gone, for now anyways. Perhaps that’s all the rite had done. Slowly, Anders felt himself being pulled from the fade. His heart raced, as panic flooded his mind. He needed them to believe he was tranquil, his entire fate depended on it. 

Ever so cautiously, he opened his eyes. The room before him was dimly lit, but as his sight adjusted, he could see both Meredith and Cullen standing before him.

“On your feet, mage,” Meredith barked, her face in a tight line. Anders did what was told, noting that his limbs were freed from their tight binds. He could feel that his wrists were badly bruised, and it hurt to stand, but he did so with neither complaint or sign of any pain visible on his face. He attempted to mimic the blank stare he had seen so many times when passing a tranquil mage; that horrible glaze he saw in Karl’s eyes. Meredith circles him, the way a wild cat would it’s prey. She stopped directly behind him, and Anders’ breath caught in his throat.

“You are a Tranquil of the Kirkwall Circle now. You are to do as I, or your Templar betters command. Do you understand me?”

“Yes,” he answered low in his throat, doing everything in his power to make the word sounds hollow, although he was seething with rage inside. 

“Good. Ser Cullen, you are free to tend to your other duties. Ser Carver will see to our new Tranquil.” 

Anders thought being around Hawke’s brother was a test to his resolve, but when Hawke saw him in the Gallows, he knew he was in his own personal void. 

 

Later that evening, Cullen showed Anders to his living quarters. To his surprise and delight, the Tranquil weren’t locked away and confined to their spaces, as the other new mages would be, and it was lightly guarded. Their living area was at the bottom floor. He recognised it right away. It was close to the hidden entrance in which he had met with Gerard many times. Gerard was a Circle mage who Anders had been working with in secret for some time. The two of them helped several mages escape over the span of his residence in Kirkwall. Lights began to flicker in Anders’ mind. This would be his chance. 

Anders waited a time, how long he couldn’t be sure. He lay stiffly in his bed, listening to the soft sounds of the other Tranquil enduring a dreamless sleep. He shared a room with three others, their living space small and cramped. When he was certain they were all asleep, he gently pressed his feet to the floor and peered around the corner of the room.

He could spot the one Templar guard from where he stood, the man fast asleep in a chair in the corner. Gerard had told him before that the guards on Tranquil duty often took their job lightly, making it easier for the two mages to meet. Anders tested the floor, pressing his weight down on it with a single foot. It barely creaked beneath his weight. With his breath caught in his chest, he crept forward, maneuvering around the furniture. When the guard twitched in his sleep, Anders’ heart caught in his throat. He froze mid step, beads of perspiration dripping down his temples. The man resumed his snoring, allowing Anders to let out a breath of relief. He glanced at the spot beside him, staring into a mirror for the first time that day. The man that stared back at him was something that lived only in his nightmares. The brand of tranquility was visible on his forehead, the edges of it raw and beginning to scab. He wanted to throw his fist at the reflection, to feel the shards shatter at the contact of his fist. Yes, he was grateful for his life. He had no idea if the Maker existed, or why he was spared from such a horrid fate, but he felt like weeping at the sight before him. He would forever wear this mark of shame; live the rest of his days without his magic - for the rite had taken that from him too. His thoughts were his own, but like Justice, all traces of his magic had faded away. He hadn’t realized it at first, but laying in the middle of his bed just minutes before, he focused, and could not feel his mana. Anders wasn’t even able to summon the most simplistic of spells. Maybe he should be glad - that he was free from the one thing that plagued him his entire life. He finally looked away from his reflection before he quietly snuck around the corner, and made his way down to the tunnels.

He hadn’t been sure if he would have even seen Gerard there tonight, as it was now public knowledge that Anders was a tranquil. But there he was, at their usual meeting spot, pacing about. The man seemed to be at war with his own thoughts, his silver hair messed and unkempt. Anders took a few steps forward, when Gerard’s gaze met his. The mans green eyes widened in shock.

“You told them about me, didn’t you? You led them right to me!”

“No,” Anders said softly. “Listen…”

“I need to get out of here.” Gerard went to pass Anders, but the blonde mage grabbed the hem of his robe, stopping him.

“Look at me Gerard. I am not tranquil. Their rite failed somehow.”

“But that’s….it’s…”

“Impossible? I thought so myself. Justice is gone, as is my magic, but my mind is my own.”

Gerard’s expression softened, as calm over rode the fear in his system. “So the Knight Commander doesn’t know?”

“If she did, I wouldn’t be here long. Look, I know you have other sources on the outside. I need you to deliver a letter for me.” Anders reached into his pocket and handed him a letter he wrote earlier that night before his privacy had been interrupted when the tranquils returned from their duties. “Hawke needs to see this. She needs to know what happened. It’d be too risky for myself to leave right now. I need more time to think, but she needs to know.”

“Yes, of course.” Gerard placed the letter in his pocket. “Are you sure about this? If I’m caught; if the Templars find me with this letter on me...this could be your only chance for escape Anders.”

“I trust you. Please, just make sure it gets to Hawke.”

Gerard nodded, and made his way down the path that would take him to the others waiting. Anders felt knots in his stomach. Freedom was just at the end of the tunnel, but now was not the right time. No, he had to play his cards right and wait for Hawke. If he escaped now, he put his family in danger before they had the chance to prepare for the attack. It would be better to have the power in her hands, for her to decide the final move. Hawke was not the type of enemy you wanted to have. Meredith would have a world of pain waiting for her, this he knew. Anders treaded back to his room, the guard having known not of his absence.

As for now, the mage would wait.


	18. A Dire Plan

With eyes that stung and a body that ached all over, Hawke slumped down the stairs. She had finally gotten a little sleep, only due to Merrill’s special tea she brought over the night before. Her Dalish friend looked at her with worried eyes, assuring her that everything would be alright, but Hawke could see the panic written across her face. If Anders wasn’t safe from the templars, neither was she. 

Hawke thought that maybe sleep would have saved her from this agonizing pain that was eating away at her soul, but as soon as she drifted off, Anders was all that she saw. It was as if her subconscious took her through every tender memory; all of the soft kisses and whispered proclamations of love, she experienced each moment anew. From the first night he showed up at her door, to the day he delivered Sadie. She could smell the sandalwood on his skin, the soap he used in his hair. She could feel the way her mana reacted to his when they made love, the tiny hairs at the back of her neck standing on end as she rode out the bliss of ecstasy she endured whenever they came together as one. Right before she awoke, he looked at her with kind eyes, the corners crinkling the way they always did when he smiled at her. “Don’t grieve for me, love. I am still with you,” he spoke, as he caressed her cheek. The moment she woke, tears spilled from her eyes, burning the raw skin beneath. 

Hawke sat at the kitchen table, Fenris staring at her with curious eyes as he cradled Sadie in his arms. The infant fussed about in his lap, whining at the sight of her mother. Just looking at her daughter hurt. Her father was ripped away from her life, with not so much as a goodbye. Sadie was young; surely she would soon forget him, and maybe it was for the best. She could have more of a normal upbringing now, but that didn’t make it right. Anders had loved their child endlessly, and just sitting at the table without his presence felt wrong. 

“Hawke,” Fenris said cautiously. “Will you eat something now?”

“I’m not hungry.”

The elf’s brow furrowed as he looked at her with concern. “You will make yourself ill. All this worrying will do you no good.”

“And just what am I supposed to be doing Fenris?” she snapped. “Shall I just forget he even exists? Pretend that I never met him at all?”

“Of course not. I am worried is all. I do not want for you to fall ill. I have seen it happen many times. Worry in the heart can cause a great strain on the body. Please Hawke, take care of yourself, if not for me, for our daughter.”

Hawke let out a deep sigh, her breath still shaky from the weight of her emotions. “Alright.” There had been an extra bowl of porridge laid out for her, and she forced a few spoonfuls into her mouth. The act itself made her want to gag, her mouth being incredibly dry and her stomach in heavy knots. She chased it with a few gulps of water. Hawke stood from her seat, about to excuse herself so she could go back to bed, when there was a silent knock at the door. She presumed it would be more of her friends, as they had all made their appearances known over the last day to give their condolences. She really wasn’t in the mood to hear any more heart felt apologies, only wanted to fall into a deep dreamless sleep. Hawke padded to the door, but when she opened it, there was no one to be seen. Glancing at her feet, she saw a folded up parchment. She picked it up, reading the words written down. At first, she wanted to tear the thing up, thinking somebody was playing a terrible joke on her. But as she read it a third and fourth time, tears fell freely as she knew the words to be true.

Love,

Please hear me out. I know you will be skeptical, but you must believe me when I say I am not a tranquil. My heart broke today when you saw me in the Gallows. I had to pretend, I had to lie! What would they do if they knew their rite had failed? Nothing could have crushed me more than seeing the desperation in your eyes, pleading me to acknowledge you. I almost lost it sweetheart. I almost gave way to my selfish temptation, and that would have caused me everything I hold dear.

I don’t know what to tell you, only that Justice is gone. Their ritual separated us, and I am now as I was before I met him in Amaranthine. I don’t know what Meredith is planning, but I do know she is using me against you. I believe she is looking for a reason to have you arrested. Please do not act in haste. Talk to Fenris, Aveline too if you must. I will be alright, so long as they believe I am tranquil. Together we will find a way to end this madness. Do not send me a correspondence, I fear the Templars will find it. If you need to reach me, send word to Gerard. He can meet you in the Gallows. If not, I will see you again soon. Give Sadie a kiss for me.

Forever yours,  
Anders

 

She almost couldn’t believe it, but that scrawl - that terribly messy writing. She had seen it far too many times while Anders had been hunched over, working on his manifesto. It really was him! Hawke knew when she saw him standing calmly in the Gallows, when he flinched at her words...that a part of him still existed! Only it wasn’t just a fraction of the man she loved, it was all of him. She broke down, laughing as more tears came. All of her excruciating pain; the endless tears and mental void she had been living in was suddenly gone, now hope in it’s place. Fenris came into the room, after having put the baby down for a nap. With a raised brow, he gently touched her shoulder.

“What is it?”

“Here Fenris, read this!” she handed him the letter. It took him a few minutes, as his reading skills were still new. Hawke wiped her eyes with her sleeve, barely noticing the sting of protest her raw and broken skin gave. 

“Are you certain this is from him?” Fenris finally asked, unable to hide the doubt in his voice.

“I would recognise that cursive anywhere!” she beamed.

“What do you wish to do? It’s not as if we can demand that Meredith release him.” 

Before she could answer, another knock came from the door. This time when Hawke answered, it was Knight Captain Cullen. Hawke panicked for a brief moment. Had the Templar discovered Anders’ secret?

“Hawke, I apologize the interruption, but I must speak with you.”

“Of course,” she said cautiously trying to mask her suspicion. She closed the door behind him. “What brings you here?”

“I…” he started as he fidgeted nervously where he stood. “I realise I am not your most favorite person in the world right now, and that things went badly the last time we spoke. But I need your help.”

“My help? Whatever do you mean?”

“It’s the Knight Commander. I believe she’s gone mad!”

“And that’s news how?” she huffed, feeling bile at the mention of Meredith’s undeserving title.

“I am serious Hawke. At night, I can hear her ranting. Raving as if someone is in the room with her, but she’s always alone. And Anders...he isn’t the first to be made tranquil this week.”

Hawke let out a breath, relieved that Anders still was believed to be tranquil.

“She’s been pulling mages from their quarters at all hours of the night, having them put through the rite for little to no cause! I’ve always been a firm believer in the circle, but there’s something very wrong at hand.”

“What are you suggesting Hawke do? She has little power over the Knight Commander’s actions,” Fenris interjected,

“Come with me to see the Grand Cleric. Elthina can put a stop to this madness. You may not have power over Meredith, but she does, and she will listen if we both go to her. Together we cannot be ignored.”

Hawke wanted to throw her arms around Cullen and thank him, because even if the Templar hadn’t realised it, he gave Hawke just what she needed in her moment of desperation. A huge wave of relief washed over her, and suddenly things didn’t seem quite so bleak. Anders was of his mind, and now there was a way to bring Meredith down. She could burst from hope, but maintained a casual demeanor as she looked directly at Cullen.

“Then let’s not waste a moment longer.”


	19. A threat no longer

The sun was beginning to set in the distance, casting an array of breathtaking pink and magenta hues across the slowly darkening sky. On another given day, Hawke would have loved to be sitting on her balcony, taking in the beauty of this warm night, the balmy breeze blowing through her chestnut hair. However, with the Knight Commander in front of her, she did not notice such things. All she could see was a red mist of rage in front of her eyes, blinding her to everything else in view. She stood in front of the Chantry doors; Elthina had thought it would be better than meeting inside of the Chantry, so not to interrupt those who sought out solace in prayer. Across the yard, her dear friends had assembled, watching and waiting in case Hawke were to need them. She had been there for each and every one of them throughout the years, now it was their turn to have her back. Fenris stood faithfully at her side, and Sebastian at Elthina’s. Cullen had gathered Carver and his two most trusted Templars, ones that had sworn an oath to speak nothing but truly of the Knight Commander. It seemed that all in presence were against the Knight Commander, Cullen’s men backing his claims of her recent lunacy. 

“This is an outrage, one that will not be tolerated!” Meredith hollered. She had been yelling for the better part of their meeting, causing a large crowd of the nobles to congregate. For over a year, there had been many hushed whispers throughout Hightown, and it seemed that Meredith had few who would follow her lead. Many thought Hawke should have reign over the city, despite her magic and less than conventional love life. That spoke volumes about how the Knight Commander was viewed. Yes, Hawke was a saviour to the city, but even then, it was a city filled with nobility. Appearance was everything to them, so when an unwed apostate mother was favored, there was definitely something amiss. 

“Calm now, Meredith,” Elthina spoke calmly. She remained unruffled by Meredith’s display of anger, holding her ground. “Nothing has been finalized.”

“It is all her doing,” she glared at Hawke. “What kind of blood magic is this, Champion? What have you done to turn my men against me?!”

“That was your own doing,” Hawke hissed right back. “You have clearly lost your mind. You, Knight Commander, are beginning to sound like the one who is possessed. The second something displeases you, instantly blood magic is the culprit! Enough is enough!”

Meredith stomped forward, murder in her eyes, as she was face to face with Hawke, their faces mere inches apart. “You have only been tolerated on account of your past heroic deeds in defence of Kirkwall. This has allowed you freedom, but no longer. You shall be my next arrest. You are Champion no longer!” she spat in her face. Hawke hadn’t flinched, but Fenris, protective as always, appeared directly at her side.

“I tempt you to try,” he sneered at the Knight Commander, his usual vibrant green eyes narrow and dark with anger. 

What happened next took everyone by surprise- it all happened so fast. Meredith’s arm lowered, her hand gripping the handle of her sword. Elthina acted first, the Grand Cleric not wanting any violence to occur on the footsteps of the sacred Chantry. She stepped forward, placing her hand on Meredith’s arm.

“That is enough -” but before she could finish, the Knight Commander struck her with her free arm, knocking the Grand Cleric to the hard ground. A wave of gasps surrounded them, as bystanders stood completely in shock and horror. Sebastian was at Elthina’s side in a flash, helping her back to her feet.

“You dare!” he screamed at Meredith. 

Meredith drew her sword, finding three more pointed at her, all belonging to her Templars.

“This is not what the Order stands for,” Cullen spoke, his voice stern. “Knight Commander step down! I relieve you of your command.”

“My own Captain falls prey to the influence of blood magic,” she said with conviction, her eyes wide. “You all have! Allowing the mages to control your minds. They turned you against me! But I don’t need any of you!” Her hand gripped her sword tight, and suddenly the blade flared red. The Templar’s eyes drifted down to her weapon, and in that instant she struck, first Cullen, his blade flying out of his hand and across the yard. She turned swiftly, knocking one Templar into the other, with a force that was unnatural. They both fell to the ground, completely stunned. Carver backed away cautiously, not knowing how to act next, leaving Fenris with his sword drawn and Hawke with her staff ready. Sebastian escorted Elthina back to the Chantry as Hawke’s companions neared, ready to face down the Knight Commander. A twisted smile played across her lips as she faced Hawke. 

“You recognise it, do you not? Pure lyrium, taken from the Deep Roads. The dwarf charged a great deal for his prize.” She turned her gaze to her men, who were just getting back to their feet. Cullen, sword back in his hand, began to close the distance between them again. “All of you! I want her dead!”

“You’ll have to go through me.”

Meredith looked from side to side, seeing that she was surrounded, and that none stood with her. Panic flashed through her eyes, but only for the briefest of moments. She drove her lyrium branded sword right into the ground. Hawke and Fenris stumbled back, a red protective aura circling the blond warrior as she began the chant of light. Her head lifted slowly, her eyes shining a demonic red and her smile menacing. And then, she charged.

The first strike Meredith took was at Hawke, the force behind it causing the mage to stumble. The Knight Commander suddenly had the strength of twenty men, the sinister weapon in her hand lending her its malevolent power. Fenris released a loud war cry, swinging his sword at the Knight Commander. She turned, her sword clashing with his. They both held their ground, sword pressed against sword, staring into each others eyes. 

“I think I will have you arrested next, elf. I’ve heard you are not unfamiliar with chains.”

“You shall fall before you even try.”

One of Varric bolts pierced through Meredith’s shoulder, but she did not so much as flinch. Fenris stared at the wooden shaft protruding through her armour, for a moment surprised that it didn’t seem to cause her any pain. Catching him off guard, Meredith pushed forward on her sword with a great strength. Fenris fell flat on his back, his eyes closing through the sudden pain as his head slammed painfully against the ground. The crazed woman stomped forward, bringing her sword high, but stumbled back as Hawke shot her with a paralyzing force.

“You have taken one man away from me, I’ll be damned if you take two!” she screamed, rushing to Fenris’ side. She pulled him to his feet, as he gave her a quick glance of gratitude. There was no time for them to linger, though, because Meredith shook the spell off, then rose back to her feet, now snarling. One of the Templars came forward, striking her arm. Blood splattered out at the contact. Meredith swung back, her weapon coming into direct contact with the Templars neck, decapitating him in an instant. His head rolled across the ground, causing the remaining bystanders to scream and scatter, fleeing to the safety of their homes. 

The battle went on and on, and to Hawke’s surprise, the Knight Commander gave just as good as she got. She was outnumbered greatly, but the strength the red lyrium gave her caused her to barely notice pain. Her adrenaline was at a sky rocketing high. Despite the spells Merrill and Hawke cast, or the blows from Fenris and Aveline, even through out the sneak attacks from Isabela and Varric, Meredith stood her ground. Carver and Cullen had even joined in. The death of his second Templar had been enough to make Cullen lose his temper and shift his loyalties: Meredith was no longer the woman he once held great respect for. Now he wanted nothing more than to have her blood on his hands; on any of their hands. 

The fight had been going on for nearly a half hour, the moon full in the sky. It was then that Meredith finally began to show signs of fatigue. She let out a desperate gasp, swinging her blade in every direction, blindly trying to hit any target. Hawke, tired as she was, had more stamina than Meredith- or perhaps, more determination. She charged forward, letting out a loud cry, as her staff clanked with Meredith sword. Her mana flowed through, freezing the sword. Upon the collision, the lyrium branded sword shattered into a hundred tiny fragments, scattering across the ground. A red mist spread through the air, consuming Meredith. She fell to her knees, shrieking loudly, her eyes glowing an even brighter crimson shade than before. Her screams fell silent, despite her mouth being left open. The mist left a golden sheen in it’s wake, hardening on the Knight Commander’s skin. Everyone stood in utter shock and silence, and before they knew it, Meredith was no longer. She looked like a statue, frozen in time in a grotesque grimace of pain, her form staring up into the night sky. Her entire torso looked rock hard as Hawke slowly approached. With a sturdy tap, she hit the strange sight before her, and it rang hollow. There was no way Meredith was still alive- the red lyrium had consumed her very being. 

“What now?” Cullen asked, looking dazed.

“Go get Elthina. Tell her Meredith is a threat no longer.”

 

It took three days following the battle for Anders to be released from the Gallows. There was a huge debate between Hawke and Cullen, even after their short-lived alliance while taking down Meredith. Hawke hadn’t spoke of the failed rite, afraid that the Templar’s would try again and succeed. Instead she’d brought up Cullen’s confession, how he’d spoken to her of how Meredith had been arresting mages and making them tranquil for little to no cause. She insisted that Anders be released to her, especially now that he were “tranquil” and no longer posed a threat. Elthina was once again brought in the middle of their squabble, and after much thought, she sided with Hawke. If he had no magic (which unbeknownst to Hawke was true), he no longer needed to be held in the Gallows. A disgruntled Cullen sighed, and told Hawke that her brother would deliver the once - mage to her house later that day. As much as Hawke had been thankful for his help against the Knight Commander, she absolutely wanted to deck the man at times, this being one of them.

Hawke paced her living room back and forth, Sadie nuzzled in her arms. Her rocking back and forth had put the baby fast asleep.

“You shouldn’t worry yourself. I’m sure they will be here shortly,” Fenris spoke, interrupting her muddled thoughts. 

“But what if Cullen found out that their ritual failed? What if - “ before she could continue, she heard a knock at the door. Her heart felt as if it leapt all the way into her throat. With Sadie in her arms, she rushed to the door, opening it with her free hand. There stood Anders with Carver, who stood nervously to the side, not knowing what to say. Anders’ eyes met hers, no longer bearing the cold look they had the last time they’d met. No, they sparkled back at her, lifting in the corner as a smile spread across his face. Hawke let out a high pitched sound, before bringing him to her chest, kissing him deeply with the baby cradled between them. 

“What….but he…?” Carver said, puzzled. Anders turned to him and winked, causing the Templar to groan.

“Oh for the love of the Maker. But...how?!”

“Not a word of this Carver. Not yet. Please.” Hawke pleaded with him.

“I didn’t see a thing.” He let out a sigh. “You’re in the clear for now, sister.” 

Hawke barely heard him, as she held Anders close, breathing in his scent.

“I can scarcely believe you’re here,” she let out, a tremor in her voice.

“You won’t be rid of me so easily, love,” he smiled, placing a tender kiss on her forehead. Her eyes welled up, remembering how scared she was, thinking she would never feel those glorious lips on her skin again.

“I best be going. Cullen has been in a foul mood.”

“Keep me updated, Carver. There’s going to be an uproar from the people of Kirkwall, no doubt.”

“I’ll send word for you as soon as I know what happens. For now, Cullen remains in charge. No doubt they will want to appoint a new Viscount. You have little to worry, however. Many saw what Meredith did in front of the Chantry. Very few would put you at fault.”

“After all we’ve been through, the last thing I need is a mob of angry nobles ready to kick in my front door,” she replied with a sigh. “Thank you, Carver.”

The door quietly closed after the Templar’s departure. Hawke smiled at Fenris, who was waiting calmly by the stairs.

“It is good that you have returned,” he said to Anders, causing the mage to lift an eyebrow.

“Do you actually mean that?”

“I do not jest. Hawke was beside herself. As was Sadie.”

Anders peered down at the baby who was still asleep in Hawke’s arms. He scooped her up, holding the infant to his chest as he kissed her forehead. Slowly, she stirred and opened her eyes. For a few moments, the two stared at one another, not a sound audible in the silent room. Hawke was beaming, in awe at the sight before her, when suddenly a smile crept up on Sadie’s face, as the baby let out a loud laugh. Anders gasped, in pure delight, as he cradled her closely.

“That is the most glorious sound I have ever heard.”

In this moment, life was beautiful. Meredith had been defeated, and Anders was safe at home, nothing to show for his ordeal save for the brand that remained on his skin. Hawke had the love of two wonderful men, and a beautiful daughter who was happy and healthy. For as grim as times could be, it was the little moments like this that made it all worth it in the end. She felt like the luckiest woman in all of Thedas. There was no force that could take this away from her. Things were the way they were meant to be, at last.


	20. Silver Lining

Throughout the weeks that followed Anders’ return to the Hawke estate, rumours flooded the streets of his failed tranquility. If Cullen had heard, he had not pressed the matter. His hands were full, as Meredith’s responsibilities fell on the Templar’s shoulders. The nobility of Kirkwall had been meeting to discuss who should take the title of Viscount. Hawke had been asked to give her opinion, but at the moment, she cared not for such matters. Let the nobility decide, she thought. After all her family had been through, it was time to take a break from all of the stress that had been heaped unto her.

Anders was trying to adjust to his free mind. It had been so long since it had belonged to none but himself. He felt a sense of calm that seemed to ease the tension in his mind. At first, he had been delighted by the new developments: Meredith was dead, and while the Circle was still in place, Cullen now ruled it. He was not an unreasonable man, for a Templar. Perhaps there was more Anders could do for his people, now that the tyrant was gone.

But then came the realization that, he in fact was no longer a mage. Even though the Rite had failed in making Anders a tranquil, it had succeeded in ridding him of his magic. During his childhood, he thought it as a curse, something to hate and be ashamed of. It was what made his father send him away from his childhood home. The Templars had treated him as if he were a plague, causing the youth to detest his very being. But as he grew older, he’d come to appreciate his magic. How many had he healed, and saved from death with his own hands? How many times had he protected Hawke from danger? What good was he to her, or the city, now that he had lost his ability to heal? He would no longer be able to run the clinic, not the way he used to. Anders tried to look for the silver lining; he was alive and now perhaps he could give his family the attention they deserved. He knew that like all wounds, in time, this too would heal. Still, it left an uneasy feeling resonating within the mage. He suddenly had this feeling of emptiness, a grown man not knowing who he was or where his place belonged in this world.

Anders was grateful for Sadie. She was a welcome distraction for his troubled mind. The baby had began to crawl, and the residents of the Hawke estate were suddenly increasingly aware of the dangers that lurked around the home. There were countless sharp corners she could bump her delicate little head into, glass objects that could shatter and cut her skin not to mention the staircase. Anders no longer saw this as a safe home for their child - but a veritable death trap. He spent hours removing small objects out of reach, and even put his hands to use, building a gate at the top of the stairs. 

The mage slowly came to enjoy his afternoons at home. His bond with Sadie had grown even stronger than it was before. The baby always wanted him to hold her, and when he wasn’t cradling the small infant in his arms, he was playing with her on the floor. Since she’d began to crawl, Anders had found her to be a constant source of entertainment. He would place her toys on the floor, scattered all about the room, and observe how long it would take her to find them all. For one having such short limbs, it was a wonder how fast Sadie could move. She would laugh and coo as she went about the room, shrieking each time she found a new toy. Her laughter brought such joy the the mage that he often forgot about his ordeal in the Gallows.

However, there were days where Anders wish he could do more. Hawke and Fenris had begun to go about their old duties. The streets were still a danger at night, and someone needed to keep them safe. Anders began to feel restless, wishing he too could be of service somehow. Even at home, he wasn’t sure how well he would be able to protect Sadie if an intruder should enter their home. He had relied on magic for so long, he never thought about taking up any other combat skills. He found himself looking in the mirror, staring at himself. His arms were strong and well defined from years of wielding a staff. Perhaps he was not completely hopeless, after all. 

One afternoon, while the baby slept and Hawke was out for the day, Anders nervously approached the study. Fenris was alone, working on his reading. The mage stood in the doorway, observing for a few minutes. Fenris had a long novel in his hands, which he seemed to be halfway done with. Anders recalled when the elf had first resumed his reading lessons with Hawke, and how he himself had mocked him for struggling with a children’s book. They had both come a long way from those days. Even so, Anders felt uncomfortable as it were he who needed help with something he was unfamiliar with. He cleared his throat, causing the elf to look up from where he sit.

“Is there something you need?” he asked after a moment of silence. Fenris placed the book on the side table, standing to his feet.

“I suppose you could say that,” Anders answered. He was almost as nervous as he had been that day so long ago, when he walked up the steps to Fenris’ mansion, before asking him to father a child with Hawke.

“I am not clairvoyant,” the elf broke his thoughts. “If there is something you need of me, you must ask for it yourself.”

Anders took a few steps closer, than stopped mid stride. He opened his mouth, then closed it again. He really hated asking others for help, especially one he had ridiculed so much in the past. Fenris quirked his eyebrow in suspicion. Anders let out a deep breath, running a hand through his sandy blonde hair.

“Would you teach me how to wield a sword?”

“I beg your pardon?” 

“I would like to learn how to fight properly, as I can no longer rely on my magic. I need to know that I can protect Hawke and Sadie, should they ever need me to.”

Fenris was quiet and contemplative a few moments. Finally, his eyes met the former mage’s. “I will teach you everything I know.”

 

Hawke began to notice that, over the last few weeks, Anders and Fenris had become somewhat closer than usual. She was ready to conclude that the loss of Anders’ magic and the departure of Justice was the cause, but the duo had often disappeared together. It left Hawke feeling a little curious about what the two had been getting up to during her absence. 

One night, while she had been working on her correspondence in the study, she heard a loud thud coming from the garden. Feeling a sense of urgency, she grabbed her staff and made her way to the yard, expecting to see an intruder. Instead, Anders was on his back, Fenris standing over him with his sword drawn. Panic struck her, but she stilled before she was about to interject.

“You erred in your steps. An enemy would take this advantage to deliver the final blow,” Fenris said, helping Anders to his feet. “You must not allow him to have the upper hand.”

“This is pointless. I have no idea what I’m doing,” Anders said in a huff.

“Nonsense. You have greatly improved since we first began. You will adapt in no time.”

Hawke smiled, and disappeared back into the house before they could notice her watching them. It was wonderful to see them helping one another. She never would have imagined years ago, that the two would grow to appreciate one another, and maybe even become friends. For the first time in a long time, there was nothing but joy in her household. It was a feeling that would remain for a long time.

 

It was a quiet afternoon as Hawke lay languidly in bed, falling asleep to the sound of rain pattering against the window. Fenris was out at The Hanged Man visiting with Varric, and Anders had just put Sadie down for a nap. Hawke had a rather late night with the baby, as she had a few teeth coming through and was rather fussy. These moments of peace and quiet were a welcomed break.

Anders silently padded into the room, letting the door click behind him. He joined Hawke on the bed, nuzzling his face into her neck and peppering her skin with kisses. She turned to face him, a gentle laugh leaving her lips.

“You’re in a good mood.”

“And why shouldn’t I be? You and Sadie are both healthy and I’m...well, I’m here with you.”

Hawke ran her fingers through his hair. “You have no idea just how happy that makes me.” There had been so much turmoil in their lives and in their relationship. Hawke had been worried since his return home, as Anders had struggled to come to terms with his new life. But right now, he was looking at her the way he used to. It made all of her senses come to life and every nerve in her being sing and strum in joy. She had missed him terribly. Hawke leaned forward, caressing his lips with hers. Anders groaned immediately at the contact. It had been far too long since the two of them had been intimate with one another. Her fingers found purchase in his hair, tugging slightly as she deepened the kiss. Anders lifted one of her legs and wrapped it around his waist, grinding his erection into her. She stifled a moan at the back of her throat, her vision white behind her closed eyes at how good his touch already made her feel. Without any warning, suddenly his caress was gone. Hawke opened her eyes, seeing Anders blankly looking at the ceiling.

“What is it?” She asked, worry lines appearing at the corners of her eyes.

“I’ve just been thinking. It may be a silly thing to frown over, but...I know how much you enjoyed yourself when I used that electricity trick on you. And well, I won’t be able to do it any more.”

Hawke pressed her palm against his cheek, so he turned to face her. “All that matters is that you are with me now. If you can recall, you never needed your magic to keep me satisfied. Besides,” she trailed off, a devilish glint in her eyes. “You taught me how to do the trick, and I’ve mastered it all on my own now.”

“Is that so?” he asked, the playfulness returning to his voice.

“Mhmm, now get back over here before I finish what you started without you.”

“That’s really not going to persuade me to move any faster you know. Maybe I want to see you use that electricity trick on yourself.”

“That can be done.”

Hawke’s eyes never left his as she began to undress herself, slowly for his sake. He stared at her like a starving man, as if she were something to be ravished. His clothes came off too, leaving the two lovers side by side, staring intently at one another. Anders slid down towards the foot of the bed, idly stroking himself.

“Show me,” he encouraged her with soft words. Her legs fell apart, allowing Anders to view her glistening sex. Hawke bit her lower lip, as she dipped her fingers down her belly, gently prickling her skin with tiny bolts of electric current. She softly moaned, as she spread her lips apart, showing Anders just how aroused she already was.

“Please Hawke, don’t stop there,” he groaned, the stroking of his hand faster than before. She began to wave her index finger just a few centimeters away from her engorged clit, sighing when the sparks jolted through her system.

“Does that feel good love?” Anders asked, the lust deep in his voice.

“Yes,” she gasped. “You were a very thorough teacher.” 

“I am glad to hear it,” he said, inching forward. His free palm stroked her thigh softly, making Hawke quiver with delight.

“I’ve missed your touch, Anders. I need more.”

“Where do you want me to touch you, then?”

“Everywhere,” she groaned at his teasing. Anders smirked at her impatientness.

“How can I say no to you?” Anders pushed Hawke’s finger away from her centre, as he slowly licked along the spot where her thigh met her womanhood. She let out a sharp cry, the sensation of his wet tongue on her skin a shock to her system. Anders teased her slowly, laving the other side with the same attention. His index finger began to circle her entrance languidly, before ever so slowly slipping inside. Her essence dripped from her as her began to penetrate her with one finger, and then another, scissoring them inside. 

“Maker Hawke, you’re so wet for me. I love the sounds you make, telling me just how ready you are,” he groaned, dipping his head forward and placing a quick kiss on her clit. He chuckled when he pulled away, a frustrated groan leaving her lips. “But I won’t take you, not yet. I want to play with you first, sweetheart.”

Anders took her clit in his mouth once again, this time suckling gently. His skilled tongue flicked against her nub as he sucked, causing the woman to shift her hips off the bed as she moaned loudly. She was certainly telling the truth when she told him he’d never failed at pleasing her. The man was an artist at lovemaking, and a master at teasing. His fingers picked up their pace, moving in and out of her depth as his tongue flicked at her clit. Anders removed his fingers from her, and tentatively pressed one against her back entrance. A deep groan left her lips, feeling the sensation there.

“It’s been awhile since I’ve had you here,” he said, ever so carefully sliding the tip of his finger inside. He watched her face, making sure she was ready, before he began to move it in and out.

“Maker, that feels good,” she gasped.

“When was the last time you were taken back here?” 

“I don’t know,” she shivered. “Whenever the last time we did it was. Sometime before the pregnancy.”

“So you and Fenris never?”

Hawke shook her head, amidst her pleasure. A groan left Anders’ lips, a sound caught between pride and arousal. With one finger still inside, he reached his free arm to the bedside table, rummaging through until he found the bottle he was looking for. He twisted the cap off, and applied some of the cool contents of the lubrication to his fingers, pressing two inside of her now. She moaned loudly, loving the feeling of being stretched there. His fingers stroking the nerves in an area that was surprisingly erogenous were enough to send her on the brink, the slight burning making the pleasure all the more intense. Anders resumed licking her clit, two fingers in her ass, when he slowly slid his thumb inside of her other opening. Hawke cried out, her climax tearing through her body without any warning. Her inner muscles gripped tightly at his thumb and fingers, her warm release soaking his digits thoroughly. Anders groaned against her, licking her until she began to shake and couldn’t take the teasing anymore. He sat up, still penetrating her with his fingers. He removed his thumb, instead replacing it with two digits from his other hand. She moaned louder this time, the sensation of his four fingers, two in each hole, testing her limits.

“You look so good stretched out like this. I bet you would feel even better.” They both groaned at the same time. “Would you like that sweetheart, me and Fenris both fucking you at the same time?”

“Maker Anders,” she cried out. “Yes, oh please, just fuck me already.”

“Where do you want my cock?”

“Anywhere, just give it to me now!”

Anders smirked, sliding behind Hawke so that he was spooning her. He nudged the tip of his member against her ass, slowly testing the resistance there. He had prepared her sufficiently, and it did not take much effort before he slowly slid past the tight ring of muscle. Both of them moaned in unison; her at the intensity of being stretched, him at the tight fit. 

“Let me know when you’re ready for more,” he said, his hand gripping her hip so tightly, it left a mark.

“I want more,” she whined desperately. Anders began to thrust shallowly in and out of her. Hawke squeezed her eyes shut, breathing deeply through the movements. She always did like being taken there, the intensity of their rutting bringing her pleasure to new heights. She had been scared the first time they tried it, but just as Anders promised, with enough preparation it didn’t hurt. No, it only made her orgasms even more intense this way. It was something she had greatly missed.

Anders began to circle her clit again, making Hawke keen a loud cry as she felt another climax slowly build. Before she could reach it, the handle to the door began to open. She turned her head, seeing Fenris at the door. He paused for a second, his expression quizzical before closing the door behind him.

“May I join you?”

“Please,” Hawke whined, and Anders groaned at the back of her neck.

“Maybe you’ll get your wish after all,” he whispered.

By the time she looked up again, Fenris had removed his clothing, and was climbing on the bed now. He leaned forward, kissing her as his snowy white hair fell on her forehead. Fingers palmed her breasts making her gasp at all of the sensations she was experiencing at once. It was so much, almost too much, and yet she wanted more. Fenris’ eyes scanned down her body, when suddenly they stopped at where Anders and her joined. He said nothing, looking a bit puzzled. He looked at her face with curiosity, when Anders stroked her clit again. She moaned again, her face flushed with arousal.

“It pleases you, to be taken there?” he asked, unable to hide the shock in his voice.

“Yes, Fenris. Very much so,” she said softly, followed with another cry of pleasure.

“Hmm,” he hummed in a deep voice. “A most interesting discovery.” He kissed Hawke again, pushing his tongue into her mouth. She suckled his bottom lip, pulling it between her teeth. The elf let out a low breath, his hand snaking down her front. With a glint in his eye, he pushed one finger inside of her unfilled hole. 

“Fenris,” she begged. “Oh Fenris. Please.”

Fenris pushed another finger inside, curling them against the spot she liked. She cried out again, her muscles clamping down on his invading fingers.

“Your cock, inside of me. Please.”

His green eyes met hers. “You wish us both to take you?”

“Only...only if you want. But, I would like to try it.”

Fenris pulled his hand away from her, soaked with her juices. He lay on his side, facing Hawke. Anders’ face was still buried in her hair, as he slowed his movements and just lay still so they could adjust. The elf kissed Hawke as Anders grabbed her leg, pulling it back to rest on his hip. Ever so slightly Fenris pushed forward, until he was enveloped in her tight, wet heat.

Hawke practically saw stars when he finally entered her, both men filling her in ways she had never experienced before. She cried out loudly, causing both men to pause their movements.

“Hawke?” Fenris asked with worry.

“I...I’m okay. Just take it slow.”

Fenris kissed her forehead, carefully pulling himself out a few inches, only to push forward again. Hawke gasped, her body clenching tightly.

“That feels nice,” she groaned. Soon, both men were moving in and out of her, stretching and filling her completely. They tried to discover what she liked best. First, they moved alternately, one withdrawing when the other pressed forward, making sure Hawke was never empty for a moment. Then, they worked together, timing their movements at the exact same time, making the stretch a little more intense. That seemed to really get a reaction from Hawke. She moaned louder now, only to find Fenris pressing two fingers into her mouth.

“Shh, not so loud Hawke, unless you wish to wake the baby.” 

Hawke whimpered against his fingers, sucking at them greedily as she tasted herself on them. Now, she truly was filled to the brink. Both men’s movements became erratic, and she knew they wouldn’t last much longer.

“Touch yourself Hawke. Do the electricity thing again,” Anders whispered in her ear, as he pumped eagerly into her ass. Hawke did as he requested, managing to fit her hand between her and Fenris. Her electricity danced from her fingers, sending jolts through her body. The convulsions could be felt by both men, and when Hawke screamed her completion, they joined her in the bliss. They filled her with warm torrents of seed, thrusting in and out of her exquisitely tight openings until they were completely and utterly spent. 

After they carefully withdrew from her, Hawke rolled onto her back, beads of perspiration dripping down her temples. The aftershocks of her climax were still fluttering inside of her, the pleasure gradually fading, leaving her basking in the afterglow. Her fair skin was covered in welts, crescent moon patterns on her hips and love bites on the back of her neck. 

“So love, what’s the verdict?” Anders asked, as he brushed her hair off of her damp forehead.

“Why did we wait so long to do that?” she half laughed, still catching her breath.

“Had I known you enjoyed such acts, I certainly would have pressed the matter myself,” Fenris admitted beside her.

“Was this something you wanted to try then?” she wondered aloud. 

“I hadn’t thought of it, no. But now that we have experienced how pleasurable it can be for all participants involved, I would not deny you the experience again some time, should you ask.”

“Good to know,” Hawke smiled, closing her eyes as her heart rate began to return to normal. “Now, if you both don’t mind, I was trying to have a nap before you interrupted me.”

Both Anders and Fenris barked out a laugh. “All right love,” Anders chuckled beside her. “You get some rest.”

Hawke drifted off to sleep soon after. She wouldn’t wake until morning, to find that her lovers had shared responsibility of the baby all night while they let her catch up on her sleep. Finally, after years or struggling in Kirkwall, the pieces seemed to be falling together. She had a family of her own now. And despite what others might have thought, to her, it was perfect.


	21. Epilogue

The years went by, the Hawke estate ever changing, much like the world around them. Sadie got bigger and bigger, looking much like her mother. The little girl with the raven black hair always found trouble, but no matter the cause, she would bat her eyelashes and her fathers would be twisted around her little finger. Hawke often sighed, remembering how she was with her own father when he was alive. She was always Daddy’s little girl, exactly as Sadie was now. It was usually she who had to be the discipliner of the house. 

It came to no surprise when at the age of six, Sadie had begun to develop magic of her own. It was a subject that had often plagued the household with worry. Hawke, a noble and trusted member of Kirkwall’s society, had been preparing for years. She met with the Grand Cleric often, and protested the ways of the Circle. Yes, she believed that while the Circle was good in some aspects, but it should in no way be the prison that the Chantry had made it into. Her cries and pleas fell on deaf ears, as the Grand Cleric was set in her ways. Once again, a mage rebellion had begun in the Circle, several mages escaping after staging a fight. Both Hawke and Anders knew well that if the Circle had been less strict, there would be less tension among the mages and Templars. But still, Elthina would not budge.

A few years went by, and Elthina grew ill. She passed away from consumption, leaving the title of Grand Cleric to someone else. The woman who eventually replaced her as Grand Cleric was younger, and more open to listening what Hawke had to say. She knew of all the good Hawke had done for the city. Hawke was a mage herself, so the Grand Cleric thought perhaps that spoke in volumes on just what a mage could become if they received the proper training and lessons.

The Cleric met with the nobles and Templars after a petition had been signed. Many of the nobles were worried about setting the mages free, but others, ones who had been saved by Hawke at one point or another, debated how safer the city could become with more protectors like her. It took years, but one day, the Kirkwall Circle changed. No longer was it a prison, but a school. Every mage in the city would be free to return to their families at the end of the day. Some still stayed at the Circle, having nowhere else to call home, but many began to make a life for themselves outside of the walls. When Sadie turned ten, she went to the Circle herself. Her parents had been apprehensive about coming forth that their child had been touched with magic, afraid that the laws would once again change. But with the new rules, the mages of Kirkwall were no longer feared as they once had been. Blood magic was practically unheard of within the city, and many of the mages came forward, helping to protect the city at night from criminals that lurked the streets. The crime rate dropped, and soon, many of the city’s inhabitants became grateful for the new law. No longer were the streets to be feared at night, for someone was always watching.

Eventually, duty would call to Hawke and her companions once again. Sometimes they were forced to leave the city they had called home for so long, but they would always return after a time. Precious friendships had been made there, bonds that neither time nor destiny could force apart. They had all been bound to each other, in one way or another.

As for Hawke, Fenris, and Anders, they lived their lives to the fullest, ever grateful for the time they had been given. They knew just how dreadful the world could be. Hawke swore to protect her family, her loved ones despite whatever life threw her way. It was a promise she would keep. She was not only a protector to the city, but to her home as well. Anders, capable at wielding a sword now, often shared in her responsibilities, whenever she needed a hand at her side. There were times where he and Fenris would still be at each other’s throats, but never like before. Prejudice was erased from the mens’ hearts. Jealousy was no longer an issue. There was a new-found respect for one another, a respect that touched them both deeply, more than they would ever admit.

They knew one day, the taint would consume Anders. It was no longer something he feared, for he had Fenris to look after their family when he was gone. It was thoughts like that which made the former mage incredibly grateful that they had welcomed Fenris into their home, into their hearts.

For now, whatever time they had left together, they would not squander a day. Each moment, each breath they took, was a blessing. Hawke had the family she’d always wanted; no longer did she spend nights alone in the estate, feeling empty from the death of those she’d lost. There were new precious memories to be made. She had built her life from nothing, rising from a refugee apostate to the Champion of Kirkwall. There were no doubts in her mind that she couldn’t have done it without Anders and Fenris, and she vowed that for the rest of their days together, she would show them just how much she valued their love.

And she did.

 

Fin


End file.
